Welcome to Brighton .. .now with 50% more family gambling!

So this weekend was my wonderful trip to Brighton with my BFF from the Northwest of the US, Kim. We'd planned it weeks ago because the train tickets were only 4 pounds - and you know how cheap I am!

Okay, so first of all, I had to get up at an ungodly hour on Saturday morning because our train was at 9am. Seriously, I'm definitely not a morning person - I look horrible and frankly, I'm a complete b*tch unless I have a morning Starbucks.

Thankfully, Kim and I made it to Victoria with time to spare - even though half the metro lines were shut down. Seriously, I don't get how London can do that on a weekend - it’s like they put idiots in charge of scheduling metro maintenance.

But anyways, I got my coffee, a tabloid magazine, and I was good to go. Gotta have the essentials when traveling!

The train ride itself was nice and having flown in and out of Gatwick before, it was one that I've taken before so the views were familiar. But the clouds and general grayness of the sky made everything seem extra blah - and gave some of the London architecture a real 60s USSR feel.

An hour later, we get to Brighton and the weather decided it was going to take a turn for the worse - and down came the rain. Kim, being from the Northwest, said we should just walk it anyways - and we made it halfway before taking cover in a store that used the word “sale” veeeeery loosely!

We managed to make it to the hostel, which, despite its appearance and messed up layout, did its job. We ended up in a room with some girls from Australia who were super nice, but didn’t know how to turn the power switch on, couldn’t find the light switch, and believed in using waaaaaay too much hairspray and cheap perfume!

So, after getting settled, we decided to walk to the pier - and I’ll say it right now, it’s no Santa Monica! Then again, I am biased since I'm a Cali Boy at heart!

And because it was raining, none of the rides were opened so we opted to go into the "family amusement" centre. Frankly, it was just an over-glorified casino that catered to kids - and the kid inside each of us!

All in all, it was fun. I won a few tickets at a slot machine and could have won more had I continued to play. I’m just saying that I blame the wife of Joe Sixpack, aka Footie-loving Francine, for stealing my machine!

And don't worry, I didn't have a "Hold my sh*t!" moment - I want notoriety and fame, but not for getting into fights in a children's casino! Yes, even I have standards!

But I will say that I was a little freaked out by how the pier encourages family gambling. Then again, as I say, in today's tough economic times, the family that gambles together, stays together!

So after seeing the pier, we walked through the streets and hit up some of the vintage stores. Some of the streets had a very Venice Beach feel - small streets, artsy shots, and alt. vibe.

Oh, but big news - I finally found TK Maxx, the UK version of TJ Maxx!

But my elation was short lived because I wasn’t impressed! It's really pricey, poorly laid out, and I didn't find any good bargains - except for a pair of black UGG boots that I really wanted, but somehow talked myself out of spending 30 pounds on them!

I know, j'ai am crazy and tres cheap!

Anyways, after having dinner, we discovered that Saturday night also happened to be Brighton's White Out Event - and yes, I had a field day with that event title!

... you know what I say, it's not right if it's not white!

*snap* Yeah, I went there! *snap*

Anyways, we happened to be walking down a street and I saw a runway. Naturally, I stopped and thought "Cue music, lights, camera, action!"

Then I got dragged back to reality when it turns out it was a fashion show for bicycle gear. And since I'm not a cyclist, I wasn't all that interested. Plus, and let me be honest here - then again, when am I not?! - the show wasn't all that great.

The clothes were blah, the hair was some messed-up, teased, back-combed horror show, and the girls just didn't keep it fierce enough!

Well, except for this one black chick. She had it all down, including the fierce walk, and the coordinated swaying arm movement. I was all like, "You go girl!"

Anyways, we went out for a glass of wine afterward and did some major people watching, one of my favourite hobbies. There was definitely some wacked-out fashion on display - like the plus-sized girl who thought she could pull off fierce triangular-shaped shoulder pads, or the guy who thought wearing a skin-tight gold lame bodysuit was actually acceptable!

But whatever … I don’t judge …

Yeah right!

So anyways, our Sunday was pretty relaxed since we took the bus to Lewes, which I read is the oldest town in the United Kingdom. And it definitely had that feel - it was small and charming with cute little shops, including the artisan bakery we had lunch in.

I will say that I did love this one green space that we happened to visit. It wasn’t anything special but I really liked the fact that kids had a nice, enclosed, secure place to play, go wild, and use their imagination. You know, to just be kids - something that I don’t think many can do anymore given our life.

And it's sad that kids don't have the same opportunities that I had to just do random stuff for hours and hours. But I digress - I'll save that rant for a latter time!

Anyways, after taking the train back, we opted to see a movie - I know, how original?!

We ended up seeing Pixar's Up, which, in my opinion, deserves the Oscar for Best Animated Feature - unless Toy Story 3 blows me away!

The storyline was both funny and touching, happy and sad. I thought Pixar did a great job of weaving a story throughout an entire film - and not losing sight of the main themes.

And given what I've been going through recently, it offered a surprisingly new perspective. I won't give away any plot details, but I will say that the ending made me think twice about my goals and that while there's one way to get there, sometimes you've got to have faith that it will all work out - because it just might!

So I definitely recommend Up. And I also recommend having a meal at Wokmania right across from the Odeon in Brighton. It's good food and frankly, you can't get a better Asian buffet for 5 pounds!

Anyways, sadly we left Brighton Monday morning. But not after saying goodbye to the pier.

And let me just say that the rumours are true - Kim and I did get ‘hitched’.


Naturally, we had our marriage annulled a few moments later - she couldn't handle my day (and night time) career!

Of course, during our divorce, when it came to the equitable division of our assets, we both agreed not to pursue the matter. I mean, she didn't want any of my asset-backed collaterized debt obligations and I definitely didn't want any of her credit default swaps. And then when you factored in our combined negative equity, the LIBOR rate and historical dollar exchange rates, it just got too messy!

And as Kim said so eloquently told the divorce judge, you can't split zero in half!

So we celebrated our quickie divorce by having a game of Dance Dance Revolution.

And contrary to what Kim will say, I totally beat her at it - and no, I didn't have to cheat, she just didn't press the button!

Me and my honed dancing ability, and let’s not forget about my exceptional toe point, managed to score a B overall!

Beat that, hun!

*snap*

And yeah, I’m down for a redo - just tell me when and where!

Happy Diwali! ... but again, no gifts!

So on Saturday, a bunch of us went to the Diwali celebrations at BAPS Shri Swaminarayan Mandir temple in Neasden.

First of all, it took forever to get there since it seemed as though half of the metro lines were closed. And of course, it wouldn't be a ride on the metro without seeing some questionable fashion ... like the girl who dressed up as a cracked-out Sailor Moon character and the guy who tried desperately to rock a full-length pleated skirt - with running shoes!

Frankly, it was just all kinds of wrong!

So after transferring a few times, we finally got there and Neasden has a definite suburban feel - it's just missing a huge Wal-Mart/Ikea/restaurant/movie theatre complex!

Well that, a few SUVs and some soccer moms, but we won't get into that now ...

Anyways, going to the temple was definitely an experience - there were no cameras allowed, the interior was quite ornate, we had to take off our shoes, and they even separated the men and the women.

As an outsider, it was really interesting to see - although sadly, I didn't get any gifts!

I did however get to walk across the length of the prayer room with lots of people staring - you know in my head I was thinking it's a runway!

*cue Bollywood music, lights, and a fog machine!*

And since we weren't allowed to take cameras, I could only take photos of the temple from the outside (where it changed colours every few minutes) and the expensive fireworks display that happened after the prayer service.

So enjoy!

You know you're not a Brit ...

... when you're standing in line at Starbucks jamming to Britney Spears' "Piece of Me" in your own little world. Someone walks into the store and asks if you are 'queuing' to which you politely respond, word for word, "Umm, no I'm not queuing, but I am standing in line for a coffee!" You then put your earphones back in and go back to your own little world while bobbing your head to the song!

... not that this has ever happened to me!?