My Life as an International Student in Europe

Oh Hamburg, how I love thee ...

2009-11-30T10:45:00.000-05:00

That's right, I love Hamburg – not the specialism itself and definitely not the courses – but the city itself is pretty cool.

So naturally, since I’m in London, I had to visit. And since I share my birthday with two hugely "influential" members of German pop culture - my home girl from Hamburg, Angie Merkel, and some drunk from Hollywood, David Hasselhoff - I had to go.

Well that, and I needed a good catch-up session with my home girls Nora and Carmel and my French (secretly American!) homeboy Thomas. And the £15 return flight on Ryanair sealed the deal - you know how cheap I can be!

And just like last year's trip, my weekend jaunt to Hamburg involved shopping and Starbucks!

Sadly, it didn't involve the stripper accessories store on the Reeperbahn – you know, I didn't want to step in on someone else's turf because I hate when someone tries to get all up in Paddington and "the other side" of King's Cross!

Stick to your side hunnie!

Anyways, to get there I had to get up early Saturday morning - 2:30am to be exact. That's right, I was up at 2:30am! Looking horrible, feeling horrible, and asking myself why I booked to take a flight that leaves at 6:25am in the morning from Stansted.

I was soooooo tired, but you know me, I'm so efficient that I already had my outfit laid out so that I wouldn't be trying to coordinate colours while half asleep - that'd lead to some crazy clothing combos! And by now we all know about my "look good" flying policy - after all, it's called "a runway" for a reason!

Now let me be honest for a moment - I'm not a huge fan of Stansted Airport. It's kind of blah, but whatever, if it's where I have to go to get a cheap flight, I'm there.

The flight itself was okay, even if Kim and I had a few "arguments" – you know, since we recently got “divorced”. I think she’s still hung up on the collaterized debt obligation issue! It’s not my fault, Goldman Sachs told me they were solid investment choices!

And side note … somehow, I got disinvited from her wedding! I know, shocking!

Seriously though, I really think some of the people on the plane thought we absolutely hated each other. But that's the nature of our relationship – there’s love and there’s “hate”!

*Luv ya longtime Kim!*

So we touched down in fabulous Lubeck airport (did I just say Lubeck airport was fabulous?!) on time. And let’s be honest, the airport is just a converted hanger – it’s very 1940s WWII inspired and I was totally expecting some Luftwaffe memorabilia!

The immigration people loved me, so much that they didn't stamp my passport - I think it's because I called them out for having a racist terrorism-inspired poster. It did lead to some drama when I tried to leave on Sunday though …

Anyways, we hoped on the bus and finally got to Hamburg – and in typical German fashion, the bus driver easily clocked over 120 clicks and we arrived right on time.

After about 10 minutes, Kim and I met up with Carmel and Albana and we headed for Europa Passage and the Starbucks!

I was very happy and celebrated by talking a bit of Deutsch and being all "Ein cafe latte" – then I followed it up by saying "Please, and make it non-fat with a shot of vanilla"!

Another side note: I've decided that my biggest contribution to the EU will be introducing them to my very own language that’s a mash up of English, French, German, and Spanish.

You know, something along the lines of “J’ai am tres Deutsch yet itch can only hablo de la English”

Anyways, now that I’ve offended pretty much everyone, back to my story ...

With a latte in hand, we all ended up chatting for a good 4 hours with Thomas joining in later. We all did a little shopping, but I wasn’t impressed – I missed the sales from last year!

And weirdly though, to use the bathrooms in Europa Passage, you have to pay. First of all, I hate the idea of paying for public bathrooms – I’m cheap you know! – but I grudgingly handed over 50 cents.

Anyways, thankfully since I’m such a good person, my girl Carmel let me stay with her and she lives in a part of Hamburg that’s totally my style – suburban, family-oriented, green, and right near a prison!

Loves it!

We continued our chat/gossip/bitch-out session while Thomas slept and then had pizza – and for those wondering, yes, I did eat! I let myself have a hi-cal weekend (in many ways) before having a lo-cal week!

Sunday, we just hung out at Carmel's place before Kim and Albana came over for a pancake brunch – again with the carbs and calories! Then we decided to walk along the harbour before grabbing a latte and some cake.

Again let me emphasize the hi-cal nature of my weekend!

Anyways, since Monday was my last day, we headed down to Europa Passage to have a latte and catch-up session with my fellow lo-cal German Nora. We were so efficient that we got through tons of gossip – it probably would’ve taken people days, but for us, just under 2 hours!

Of course, I still had shopping to do so I ducked into C&A and shockingly, walked out empty handed. I blame the strong Euro and the weak pound (see, I'm learning!). There just wasn't anything that did it for me – except for a pair of army green Chuck knockoffs that were at least two sizes too big!

So after my C&A disappointment, we walked around some of the Christmas markets before I grabbed my last German Starbucks and headed to the bus station.

But unlike before, this bus left late - it was soooooo un-German really! I mean, where's the efficiency in leaving on time?

And on the bus, there was the weirdest conversation between this British guy and German girl. Let’s just say that in a nutshell, the woman loudly said that she'd have a baby with a man and they didn't have to be in a relationship.

Ummm, hun, have you not seen the baby daddy drama on Maury Povich?

I mean, yes, we can do paternity tests, but this is like abusing the system!

Now of course, it wouldn't be a trip without some sort of drama – this time in the form of immigration officers who didn't believe me when I said that one of their colleagues was incompetent.

Seriously, it's not my fault they didn't stamp my passport. And why are you asking me why the person didn’t stamp my passport?

Ummm, last time I checked, I can't control people's actions – I tried once but then I realized that X-men was fake and that I wasn't a mutant with powers like Jean Grey!

Plus, even with all the proof that I flew into Lubeck, I don’t get why I needed to stand around for 10 minutes – I mean, I’m leaving the EU zone so who cares?

If I’m an illegal, let Britain deal with it!

Thankfully, 10 minutes later they let me through and I didn't want to have to get all ghetto on them! Well that and I didn’t need to name drop that Angie Merkel and I are BFFs!

The flight back was okay and I cleared Stansted easily – easier than Kim in fact – and then found myself back amongst the mayhem that is London.

It felt weird coming back – it doesn’t feel like home so I wasn’t all “Oh, it’s good to be home!”

But I will be saying that in two weeks when I touch down in Pearson, since I’ll officially be back in Toronto on December 18th.

I can’t wait!

Welcome to Brighton .. .now with 50% more family gambling!

2009-10-27T18:30:00.004-04:00

So this weekend was my wonderful trip to Brighton with my BFF from the Northwest of the US, Kim. We'd planned it weeks ago because the train tickets were only 4 pounds - and you know how cheap I am!

Okay, so first of all, I had to get up at an ungodly hour on Saturday morning because our train was at 9am. Seriously, I'm definitely not a morning person - I look horrible and frankly, I'm a complete b*tch unless I have a morning Starbucks.

Thankfully, Kim and I made it to Victoria with time to spare - even though half the metro lines were shut down. Seriously, I don't get how London can do that on a weekend - it’s like they put idiots in charge of scheduling metro maintenance.

But anyways, I got my coffee, a tabloid magazine, and I was good to go. Gotta have the essentials when traveling!

The train ride itself was nice and having flown in and out of Gatwick before, it was one that I've taken before so the views were familiar. But the clouds and general grayness of the sky made everything seem extra blah - and gave some of the London architecture a real 60s USSR feel.

An hour later, we get to Brighton and the weather decided it was going to take a turn for the worse - and down came the rain. Kim, being from the Northwest, said we should just walk it anyways - and we made it halfway before taking cover in a store that used the word “sale” veeeeery loosely!

We managed to make it to the hostel, which, despite its appearance and messed up layout, did its job. We ended up in a room with some girls from Australia who were super nice, but didn’t know how to turn the power switch on, couldn’t find the light switch, and believed in using waaaaaay too much hairspray and cheap perfume!

So, after getting settled, we decided to walk to the pier - and I’ll say it right now, it’s no Santa Monica! Then again, I am biased since I'm a Cali Boy at heart!

And because it was raining, none of the rides were opened so we opted to go into the "family amusement" centre. Frankly, it was just an over-glorified casino that catered to kids - and the kid inside each of us!

All in all, it was fun. I won a few tickets at a slot machine and could have won more had I continued to play. I’m just saying that I blame the wife of Joe Sixpack, aka Footie-loving Francine, for stealing my machine!

And don't worry, I didn't have a "Hold my sh*t!" moment - I want notoriety and fame, but not for getting into fights in a children's casino! Yes, even I have standards!

But I will say that I was a little freaked out by how the pier encourages family gambling. Then again, as I say, in today's tough economic times, the family that gambles together, stays together!

So after seeing the pier, we walked through the streets and hit up some of the vintage stores. Some of the streets had a very Venice Beach feel - small streets, artsy shots, and alt. vibe.

Oh, but big news - I finally found TK Maxx, the UK version of TJ Maxx!

But my elation was short lived because I wasn’t impressed! It's really pricey, poorly laid out, and I didn't find any good bargains - except for a pair of black UGG boots that I really wanted, but somehow talked myself out of spending 30 pounds on them!

I know, j'ai am crazy and tres cheap!

Anyways, after having dinner, we discovered that Saturday night also happened to be Brighton's White Out Event - and yes, I had a field day with that event title!

... you know what I say, it's not right if it's not white!

*snap* Yeah, I went there! *snap*

Anyways, we happened to be walking down a street and I saw a runway. Naturally, I stopped and thought "Cue music, lights, camera, action!"

Then I got dragged back to reality when it turns out it was a fashion show for bicycle gear. And since I'm not a cyclist, I wasn't all that interested. Plus, and let me be honest here - then again, when am I not?! - the show wasn't all that great.

The clothes were blah, the hair was some messed-up, teased, back-combed horror show, and the girls just didn't keep it fierce enough!

Well, except for this one black chick. She had it all down, including the fierce walk, and the coordinated swaying arm movement. I was all like, "You go girl!"

Anyways, we went out for a glass of wine afterward and did some major people watching, one of my favourite hobbies. There was definitely some wacked-out fashion on display - like the plus-sized girl who thought she could pull off fierce triangular-shaped shoulder pads, or the guy who thought wearing a skin-tight gold lame bodysuit was actually acceptable!

But whatever … I don’t judge …

Yeah right!

So anyways, our Sunday was pretty relaxed since we took the bus to Lewes, which I read is the oldest town in the United Kingdom. And it definitely had that feel - it was small and charming with cute little shops, including the artisan bakery we had lunch in.

I will say that I did love this one green space that we happened to visit. It wasn’t anything special but I really liked the fact that kids had a nice, enclosed, secure place to play, go wild, and use their imagination. You know, to just be kids - something that I don’t think many can do anymore given our life.

And it's sad that kids don't have the same opportunities that I had to just do random stuff for hours and hours. But I digress - I'll save that rant for a latter time!

Anyways, after taking the train back, we opted to see a movie - I know, how original?!

We ended up seeing Pixar's Up, which, in my opinion, deserves the Oscar for Best Animated Feature - unless Toy Story 3 blows me away!

The storyline was both funny and touching, happy and sad. I thought Pixar did a great job of weaving a story throughout an entire film - and not losing sight of the main themes.

And given what I've been going through recently, it offered a surprisingly new perspective. I won't give away any plot details, but I will say that the ending made me think twice about my goals and that while there's one way to get there, sometimes you've got to have faith that it will all work out - because it just might!

So I definitely recommend Up. And I also recommend having a meal at Wokmania right across from the Odeon in Brighton. It's good food and frankly, you can't get a better Asian buffet for 5 pounds!

Anyways, sadly we left Brighton Monday morning. But not after saying goodbye to the pier.

And let me just say that the rumours are true - Kim and I did get ‘hitched’.

Naturally, we had our marriage annulled a few moments later - she couldn't handle my day (and night time) career!

Of course, during our divorce, when it came to the equitable division of our assets, we both agreed not to pursue the matter. I mean, she didn't want any of my asset-backed collaterized debt obligations and I definitely didn't want any of her credit default swaps. And then when you factored in our combined negative equity, the LIBOR rate and historical dollar exchange rates, it just got too messy!

And as Kim said so eloquently told the divorce judge, you can't split zero in half!

So we celebrated our quickie divorce by having a game of Dance Dance Revolution.

And contrary to what Kim will say, I totally beat her at it - and no, I didn't have to cheat, she just didn't press the button!

Me and my honed dancing ability, and let’s not forget about my exceptional toe point, managed to score a B overall!

Beat that, hun!

*snap*

And yeah, I’m down for a redo - just tell me when and where!

Happy Diwali! ... but again, no gifts!

2009-10-19T06:30:00.000-04:00

So on Saturday, a bunch of us went to the Diwali celebrations at BAPS Shri Swaminarayan Mandir temple in Neasden.

First of all, it took forever to get there since it seemed as though half of the metro lines were closed. And of course, it wouldn't be a ride on the metro without seeing some questionable fashion ... like the girl who dressed up as a cracked-out Sailor Moon character and the guy who tried desperately to rock a full-length pleated skirt - with running shoes!

Frankly, it was just all kinds of wrong!

So after transferring a few times, we finally got there and Neasden has a definite suburban feel - it's just missing a huge Wal-Mart/Ikea/restaurant/movie theatre complex!

Well that, a few SUVs and some soccer moms, but we won't get into that now ...

Anyways, going to the temple was definitely an experience - there were no cameras allowed, the interior was quite ornate, we had to take off our shoes, and they even separated the men and the women.

As an outsider, it was really interesting to see - although sadly, I didn't get any gifts!

I did however get to walk across the length of the prayer room with lots of people staring - you know in my head I was thinking it's a runway!

*cue Bollywood music, lights, and a fog machine!*

And since we weren't allowed to take cameras, I could only take photos of the temple from the outside (where it changed colours every few minutes) and the expensive fireworks display that happened after the prayer service.

So enjoy!

You know you're not a Brit ...

2009-10-18T12:34:00.004-04:00

... when you're standing in line at Starbucks jamming to Britney Spears' "Piece of Me" in your own little world. Someone walks into the store and asks if you are 'queuing' to which you politely respond, word for word, "Umm, no I'm not queuing, but I am standing in line for a coffee!" You then put your earphones back in and go back to your own little world while bobbing your head to the song!

... not that this has ever happened to me!?

Time flies when you're having fun ...

2009-10-13T08:05:00.000-04:00

... or frankly, if you're just super busy and you can't have fun!

Seriously, I can't believe that as of yesterday, I've been in London for 4 weeks. Not that it has been easy, but it's shocking how quickly time has flown by!

But before I get into a quick recap of what's been going on, I just thought I'd say thank you to those that read my last post - the feedback has been great and genuinely heart-warming.

Anyways, on to the last few weeks, which seem like such a blur. I can't believe there's just 8 weeks of classes, and 2 weeks of news production, left in our semester.

Now, since it's become a ritual, let me give my thoughts on the classes.

In a nutshell, it's what I expected. The content is business & finance focused and I detect a slant towards the more newsworthy content and less so towards the soft/feature/human interest stories - but that's just my take.

Our semester is like this - for 10 weeks, we are taking 3 different courses - Global Political Economy, The World of Finance, and The World of Business. Then at the end, we have 2 weeks where we work on a newspaper and radio show - and hopefully this year, a television show.

The first course, Global Political Economy, will be where I'll shine as it fits well within my undergrad studies at York - perhaps that one Friday class I took will come in handy as I throw around phrases like 'commodity fetishism', 'devalorization' and 'disintermediation'. If anything, since there's a strong political element, I won't have a hard time motivating myself in the class to participate and learn.

I don't know if I can say that about the other two courses though. Truth be told, I feel as though I might struggle in both The World of Finance and The World of Business since there are many concepts and terms that are completely foreign to me - and I'd prefer it to stay that way!

After all, my brain has limited storage space and I'd rather allocate it to more productive uses - like who's dating who in Hollywood!

But don't worry, I haven't given up on the two courses! However, I am realistic - and unapologetic - about my lack of interest in this area. Frankly, I'm just more interested in the consumer affairs and human interest side.

And yes, I admit that my interests do relate to overall themes of finance and economics, but I don't care about using fancy terminology. What I care about is following a week in the life of a family trying to survive on one less income. Or spending the day at the market with pensioners who have pooled their money together to increase their purchasing power through buying in bulk.

At the same time, even though I'm not overly interested, I'm still eager to learn - you can chalk it up to my fear of failure. So yes, I've been doing tons of reading and note-taking ... and I'm so not loving it!

But like I said, it's only 8 more weeks and then it's on to news production. Hopefully, we'll do something in television and radio - mostly because I need to start adding clips to my portfolio ...

Then again, with all the self-reflection I've been doing lately, you'll be surprised to know that I'm considering taking a break from pursuing my talk show. Maybe it's time to branch out, try a few other things before committing to a life where there's a 99.999999999% chance that I'll only ever amount to a producer - okay, a senior producer position if I'm lucky and flatter and/or sleep with the right person!

Oh well ... on another note, these last few weeks were definitely interesting.

Like two weeks ago, a bunch of us crashed a party held by City University's Cass Business School. Even though I was seriously under-dressed, I decided that if anybody asked me about my fashion choices, I would explain that I was hired to show business graduates how to properly do 'Business Casual Fridays'.

Something along the lines of ...

Business School Nerd (I mean 'Student'): [condescending] Excuse me, but aren't you a little under-dressed. I mean, why are you wearing jeans?

Andrew: [sarcastically and in an "Oh no you didn't!" tone] Well, it's because I was hired to show people like you the Business Casual Friday look?

Student: [bewildered] The Business Casual Friday Look - what's that?

Andrew: Well on Friday, nobody wears a suit and tie anymore - that's so 1990s. Instead, opt for a more casual wardrobe selection but one that still looks professional and presentable. Sadly, that doesn't include your coveted Star Wars sweater from last year's Comic Convention in LA. But don't worry, a nice button-down blue pinstripe shirt with your trusty pocket protector and calculator will definitely work!

Student: [amazed] So much to learn!

Andrew: Yes, now follow me and let's talk about what type of jeans work best with your body type.

Sadly nobody asked me about my fashion, but the party was still fun and I got to pretend like I was a student in the MSc. in Finance program - yeah right, could you imagine me in a Finance program?!

So what else has been going on?

Well, I also went to my first Chinese Full Moon celebration - you know, since I'm so Chinese! It was fun and Chinatown was buzzing and full of people - but I missed not getting a red envelope.

Again, I hate to sound like a broken record, but I prefer to celebrate religious, ethnic, or societal holidays that involve me receiving gifts - preferably cash, but since cash is an unprofitable liquid asset, I think I'll start accepting high-yield bonds, credit default swaps and collaterized debt obligations instead ...

AAAARRRRGHHHH!

See, it's like my brain has been poisoned by these terms and concepts!

Okay, note to self ... buy tons of trashy tabloids tomorrow to get rid of the economics knowledge you're building up!

Anyways, I also went to heavy metal/screamer rock concert - you know, because that's just my favourite type of music! Well that, and I wanted to support Kim's brother whose band, Gravemaker, was playing in London.

It was my first heavy metal concert and it will probably be my last. Then again, it was an interesting anthropological experience because the bands and the audience definitely had some weird ways of dancing and raging it out - like kicking, punching, and running into people.

Seriously, during one song, someone ran into me at full force. No word of a lie, I actually started taking my ring off as I usually would during a "Hold my sh*t!" moment! I think it's now a subconscious action that I do whenever I feel like someone's really wronged me!

But it was still interesting nonetheless - however, I'm still sticking with my Top 40 hits and songs from the 80s and 90s.

So that's about it really. It's been a busy few weeks with school, including extra classes I'm taking, and just going out to see London.

And yes, London is slowly starting to grow on me, but I admit that I was mostly attracted to London after visiting the city as a tourist. And when you live somewhere as opposed to visiting for a few days, you get a much different city experience.

And with London, there are things that I like - Oxford Street, TopShop, and Rowntree's Fruit Pastilles - and things I really don't like - the weather, the class-based societal structure, and the complete lack of personal space on the subway. But then again, you get the good and bad everywhere.

Well everywhere but the suburbs ... you know, because there's nothing wrong with suburban living!

Nothing at all! :P

Arrival ... breakdown ... reconstruction ... renewal

2009-09-26T14:00:00.003-04:00

Just a forewarning ... this post is very honest and personal (and long) as it chronicles many of the issues and stresses that I face. I won't be offended if you decide not to read it, but if you do, thank you!

So, let's start with my arrival in London, which was eventful to say the least. As I’ve maintained from the start, I've been looking forward to my time in London even though I don't care much for business and finance. I thought my studies at City University would make up for the shortcomings of Aarhus and Amsterdam.

Well ... let's just say that things don't always turn out the way you want.

So first off, I arrived last Monday (September 14) at Heathrow. The flight over was great and even though I didn't get to fly first-class, I did have an empty seat beside me which let me stretch out and do some work while watching a movie. Of course, once we hit the ground and I exited the plane I got a nice introduction to the fabulous British tradition of "queuing"!

As soon as I walked into the immigration and control zone, I was greeted with a long line for first-time students. At first I thought I could just use the regular lane, but apparently not, even when I tried the whole, “But I’m Canadian” line! So I grudgingly joined the line - and you could just see the joy on my face.

In the end, I waited 2 hours before I made it to the front of the line. Seriously, at one point, the line didn't move for at least 30 minutes - and it seemed as though everyone was being asked to do an on-site medical check.

Thankfully, when I approached the desk, I was just asked about my previous visits to London, what I did, and how enjoyable I found it. 2 minutes and it was all over ...

That is, until I went to find my bags.

Since my plane had landed more than 2 hours earlier, my bags were somewhere in the baggage claim hall - and nobody could be bothered to tell me where they were. 10 minutes later I finally found them thrown to one side - so unprofessional Heathrow staff!

Already jaded, I headed for the subway which itself was an adventure. With two huge bags and a carry on, it was a balancing act - and one that took time, but I somehow found the patience to make it to Angel station and then to the place I was staying at for the year ...

Or at least planned to - again, it's funny how plans change on a dime.

The first place I was staying I'm convinced was social/public housing, which over on this side of the pond is called council housing.

It was a dingy and depressing building that reminded me of many of the buildings that my mom and I visited during her days as an Avon district manager - in fact, my building had a distinct Markham and Eglinton vibe, if you know what I mean!

When I first got to my room and met my flatmates, everything was good. I was really excited and looking forward to everything.

Then my whole world literally was flipped upside down ...

I don't know what happened, but all of a sudden, I just couldn't cope. And don't worry, I wasn't thinking about jumping from the 10th floor balcony, but I really struggled with everything.

My room wasn't what I wanted, London wasn't what I envisioned, and I immediately began to doubt myself.

About an hour later, I had a complete breakdown and needed to escape. I ended up making a few appointments to view other rooms and quickly left the place I was staying at.

Over the next few days I spent looking at housing options in other parts of London including close to Kings Cross and south of the river. After about 10 viewings, it came down to two places - one about a 15 minute subway ride away in Archway and another that was a 20 minute walk away close to Old Street.

Of course, anybody that knows me has had at least one experience where I cannot make a decision.

Wait, let me rephrase - it's not that I can't make a decision, it's that once I make it, I begin to doubt whether I made the right one. Ironically, I've never had this happen on the job so I guess that's a positive.

Anyways, after writing down a pro-con list, I opted for the room near Old Street since the landlord only needed a three month lease and it was fairly inexpensive at 450 pounds per month or about $800. Of course, I sacrificed on the size of the room as it's about 2m by 3m, but at least the bathroom is nice and new.

But Friday night, after I paid my deposit, the doubt crept in. I just kept thinking that I made a mistake, despite re-assurances from those around me that I didn't.

Saturday was a better day - and I started the day by having something to eat since I was so stressed over the week, I wasn't eating properly. Thankfully, there's a Starbucks about 10-15 minutes away which will be my "safe" place while I'm here.

Sunday started off great. I took the train to see a friend of mine in Eastleigh, which is such a nice little town close to Southampton. We had a coffee, chatted for a good 3 hours or so, and then had dinner. I won't lie, but it was the first real meal I had eaten in almost a week.

And yes, in case you're wondering, I've probably lost about 5 pounds from stress. I'll be trying to gain it back, but you know me and my relationship with food - like everything else, it will take time.

Anyways, I took the train back and arrived back home Sunday night. I called home to check in with my family, and then everything came crashing down.

Frankly, I completely broke down on the phone. I was completely overwhelmed and I'd reached the tipping point.

I told my mom that I was feeling stressed and like I had made a mistake - both in starting the programme last year and in getting on the plane a few days earlier. I was feeling as though I was letting everyone down – at the time, I didn't care about myself personally, but that others around me were disappointed.

And that disappointment was leading to stress, some of which was self-imposed since I know that last year was hard on my family. I've played such an integral role that once I left, there was a huge void that everyone needed to step up and replace.

I then started blaming myself for the struggles that my brothers went through. I believed, and admittedly still do, that if I was home last year, I could have either prevented them from happening or at least helped them through these difficulties from the start.

I know it's foolish to think that way, but you have to understand my typical Cancerian traits. I'm a homebody and value family and work hard to maintain a home and keep everyone happy and safe - and I've been doing this for a long time.

Sure, I could have given up and turned my back on my family when I was 18 and headed off to university, but I didn't. I chose to make the sacrifices I did for my family and I don't regret it.

I have strong family bonds and I derive a sense of purpose, and even part of my identity, from my family - that's why I talk non-stop about what's going on at home. I'm proud of what I've helped achieve, ashamed of the struggles we've had, but willing to put in the effort and work hard to improve.

And a much as I joke about being an SUV-driving suburban soccer mom at heart, it's who I am. Believe it or not, family is incredibly important to me.

That's why I'm also so career-focused at 23. Sure I'd love to win an Emmy for a daytime talk show, but I know there's a huge chance it will never happen - both my talk show and an award of that stature. Yet for me, that has nothing to do with it.

The reason why I'm so driven comes from my desire to have a secure and sustainable career from which I can raise my own family. In fact, I've made no secret that I want to be a stay-at-home dad while my children are young - and if that's not possible, then at least work from home and see them off to school in the morning and pick them up afterward.

And I guess all of that, combined with the fact that I'm at a bit of a career crossroads and trying to determine what I should do, lead to just feeling overwhelmed. Plus, I'm never good when I have nothing to do and without school as a distraction, my mind wanders to some pretty deep and dark places.

And so, slowly I began to feel like I should just go home. There was a large part of me that wanted to leave on Sunday night and take some time off to recharge - as some of my dearest friends have said, I've spent so much of my life taking care of other people that when I need to draw on my own reserves to get through trials and tribulations, I'm tapped out.

Thankfully though, I didn't get in a cab and head to Heathrow - and really, the only thing that saved me was the fact that I didn't have a cab company's phone number in my phone book!

Of course, trying to sleep on Sunday night was hell, but I managed to catch a few hours, which helped me recharge and reassess everything the following day.

And yes, this past week has been a lot better. Having to worry about school has been great and while I'm a little worried about how I'll cope with some of the technical aspects of business & finance, I'm up to the challenge.

Plus, now that I know more about the programme, I was able to construct a rough outline of the next few months of my life - and let's face it, I do like to ensure I've got a plan A, and a plan B, and yes, even a plan C.

So as it stands now, I'll work really hard and get through the classes - and I've already self-appointed myself as the host of the radio programme our class creates in December! Or if not that, at least the senior executive producer!

Then, I'll go home for Christmas, Boxing Day shopping, and yes, a few cross-border Buffalo trips. I'll return for a week in January for the thesis preparation courses and then fly back home to write my thesis.

While this may sound like a cop out, considering the fact that I'm writing on a controversial Canadian topic and that the UK has weird rules when it comes to working and doing your thesis, it only makes sense - both from a financial standpoint and an educational one.

Plus, being at home will give me access to resources to help me decide what I should do next ...

Should I keep trying to get my foot in the door of the Canadian media system even though I’ve had the door slammed in my face for the past three years?

Should I take a diploma in writing and producing television so I can make important contacts and branch out into screenwriting?

Should I go into teaching and curriculum development?

Should I enrol in a PhD programme in communication studies?

Of course, there are about 100 other questions swirling in my head at the same time - that's just a snapshot of some of them.

And so there you have it - frankly, it's been a week from hell.

I know I haven't been my usual bubbly, outgoing, outlandish, out-there, 'oh no he didn't' self - and I'd apologize for that, but I needed to work through some personal issues and emerge stronger.

I also know that this week is symptomatic of larger issues I need to work on - like the stress I put on myself to succeed, my fear of failing and disappointing those around me, and my tendency to put everyone else before me - but I'm hopeful and optimistic that at least by acknowledging these issues, I can start working through them.

As everyone’s been saying, I just need to take it one day at a time and hope for the best!

So thank you for reading all the way through! Hopefully, you’ve got a better insight into who I am ... if not, at least you have some great stories you can sell to US Weekly should I ever become famous!

Touchdown ... and no, not in the Paula Abdul kinda way!

2009-07-02T10:05:00.000-04:00

I'm finally back home!

After 20 weeks in Amsterdam, it feels good to be back in Toronto. Seriously, I missed everything from the Tim Horton's and gas stations on every street corner to the traffic on the 401 and DVP during rush hour - I even missed the soccer and hockey moms who fight over parking spaces at the community centres!

And I apologize for not updating my blog within the last few weeks. Frankly, I've just been too busy with work, school, and side projects. But here's a quick recap ...

Let's start with work, which went well. I was sad to leave and I've definitely learned a thing or two - like how to negotiate the politics of a newsroom. Plus, I officially have a fan in Seattle who e-mailed me via Facebook to tell me he listens to the show and he likes my press review and music segments. I have to say that I love having fans - and I'll be sure to thank them should I ever win a People's Choice Award for Choice Talk Show Host!

My Saturdays changed from my acting class day to my museum and culture day. I tried to visit as many as I could and I think I saw all the big ones. Personally, Van Gogh is definitely overrated - and full of psuedo art critics who believe they are knowledgeable and cool when they flail their plastic black-rimmed glasses as they discuss the psychosomatic tendencies of Van Gogh's sunflower paiting. But, I'd have to say my favourite was the World Press Photo Gallery - and shockingly, there wasn't one photo of a half-decent A or B-list celebrity!

As for school, well let's just say that I had just a bit of drama, nothing major though - or as the Brits say, "may-jah"! And yes, I'm still working on my own Andrew-style British accent that will be a patois of RP meets Manchester meets Yorkshire meets London - and this video is definitely helping.

Anyways, long story short, I got the 8.0 I wanted for the first course. When I went to challenge my class participation grade, the professor said I didn't speak in every class or I spoke at the end of class - obviously, he doesn't know that on the talkshow that is my life, I always have a final thought on anything and everything! And I'm sure we can all agree that me not talking in class would be the equivalent of Iran and the US becoming BFFs - it's beyond impossible!

Of course, I had substantial and concrete examples of class participation that he wasn't ready for and conveniently forgot about. But the best part was when he told me "not to be offended" and then proceeded to tell me I was a "diva", "self-centred", "intimidating" and "arrogant" - plus, he said that in Europe, it's about "we" and less about "me"!

Now, he thought I was offended by this, but let's be honest, I've been called a lot worse to my face and behind my back - and it's no surprise that I totally embrace the "diva" label! In fact, I should've put on my sunglasses and started filling my nails while talking with my best friend, you know, just to complete the look.

And so in true defiance, I told him, word for word as my final thought of our meeting, "Don't confuse my ambition with arrogance! And by the way, it is all about M.E. and in case you didn't know, that stands for my enjoyment!"

So at least that's dealt with. In our other class that certain people bitched about despite their complete lack of professionalism, Nora, Carmel and I won the vote for the research proposal pitch session. I love presentations and was definitely glad to win - ironically though, all the contests I've won in Amsterdam have had food-related prizes ... hmmm?!
*Maybe it's a sign from my doctor who I'm sure would love me to eat more!

So that was school, but let me fill you in on my trip home. It wouldn't be one of my trips without just a hint of drama - and unprofessional people and inefficiency!

I ended up missing a train connection to Schiphol by 10 seconds on account of the ghetto and old elevators in the station. That wasn't the only thing though as the conductor fully shut the doors a minute before the train was supposed to leave. And then the train sat there for more than a minute, so I definitely could have made it on - but I got my revenge by way of a pretty good glare down directed at the unprofessional conductor.

I finally made it to Schiphol airport, which in my opinion is the worst airport I've been to - it's difficult to find your way around and it looks so blah inside. It's so bad that even Aarhus airport is better! And let's just say that 2 hours at the airport was hardly enough time - I couldn't even get a coffee before my flight!

After walking around and looking like a complete idiot - j'ai was tres confused - I found the check-in counter and was told to use the self check-in kiosk thing, which was surprisingly easy. Then I looked around for the bag drop-off line and was told the long long long line I was already in was it - and so began the hour I wasted waiting to have my bags checked.

And we all know what I do when confronted with this sort of thing. I started giving everyone at the desk and all the BA staff my trademark glare down while making very audible, but polite in a Canadian sort-of way, comments about the lack of efficiency.

Seriously, the staff was so unprofessional and inefficient that they had two people serving the entire line of economy passengers and another two serving the one person in the business line. Finally, after waiting an hour, I was able to check my bags - and I used my excellent acting chops to convince the clerk I needed to take three bags instead of the two I was originally allowed!*

*Note: with British Airways, it's all about complimenting the lovely shade of navy blue and how it really brings out their eye colour - and yes, in 99.999% of cases, it's a lie, but acting is all about lying and making it sound believable!

So anyways, the delay, combined with the 20 minutes it took me to leave the Schengen area and the 5 minutes to go through security right outside meant that I literally walked from the check-in desk right on the plane - no time for a Starbucks and you can imagine that j'ai was tres annoyed. And to make matters worse, we ended up sitting on the plane for 20 minutes waiting for takeoff clearance.

Seriously, it was just one unprofessional thing after another in Schiphol.

At least Heathrow airport was better. And yes, the second I got off the plane, I ran as fast as I could to the nearest Starbucks and got a large latte before proceeding to pick up the trashy 85 and 90 pence tabloids.

And note to the Heathrow security staff - I did not have any metal on me and the detector still went off. I swear the guard just wanted to cop a feel - I don't allow anybody to do that until they've bought me a coffee!*
*It's true because my street clients in Aarhus and Amsterdam can attest to that - no touchy touchy until I've had a latte!

Anyways, the only drama at Heathrow was that when I went to get my ticket from the Air Canada desk, I was told that my reservation was lost because the plane was overbooked - I guess I was on standby, despite my bags not having the standby tag. The customer agent was nice enough to book me on a seat, albeit a window seat in the middle of the plane.

I told him that doesn't work because I like to sit at the back and get on the plane last so that I can walk all fierce down the aisle. He laughed and put a note that if an aisle seat at the back became free, I was to get it.

When I got to the gate, I was told again that my reservation was lost and they searched for my ticket indicating I was on standby. I told them if I was bumped to the 7pm flight, they were upgrading me to first class along with a flight voucher - if they are going to screw up my plans, they had better compensate me for it. Thankfully, or maybe unthankfully, they didn't bump me.

Of course the lack of professionalism and efficiency at the check-in gate meant that our flight was at least 30 minutes delayed and we fully left an hour after we should have. But we did arrive on time - I guess in the air, the plane travelled extra-fast, like 130kph, in the fast-lane and wizzed by all those other planes going like 100kph.

So anyways, I'm back safe and sound in Toronto - and counting down the days until London!

Oh, and yes, as soon as I got home, I went for a spin around the block in my SUV and had a catch-up and gossip session with all the soccer moms! You know me, I love SUVs, middle aged women, and talking about other people's kids ...

I'll make such a good stay-at-home dad - hello "Father of the Year" award right beside my Oscar!

Thanks for the memories!

2009-06-26T19:15:00.004-04:00

Just a quick update before I do a more substantial posting.

I thought I'd share our last group photo that we took after our final class.

All I can say is that it has been a blast getting to know some totally awesome people - it will feel weird come September when I won't be seeing everyone in class.

But don't despair, I'll come visiting! Yes, even Swansea that's so small so I might just take the train, step outside, wave and blow kisses to everyone and then get back on - in fact, I could probably make the trip on just a one-way ticket!

And you know I'll definitely be in Hamburg where I know all about the Starbucks in Europa Passage, the cheap and fab C&A just outside the train station, and the 'cheap and trashy but in a classy way' stripper accessories store on the Reeperbahn!

So anyways, to everyone, thanks for the memories, and we'll see ya later!

Luv ya longtime!

A is for Andrew, B is for Bold, and C is for …

2009-05-24T09:47:00.001-04:00

Career crisis?!

Okay, maybe crisis is a strong word – truth be told, I was looking for a little alliteration!

But I’ve realized that … traditional journalism just isn't for me.

Frankly, I can’t see myself doing it anymore. Having to stand outside a courtroom or police station waiting for a press conference where I have to fight with other people to ask questions just isn't my sort of thing. And I just can’t seem to write the way journalists do – I’m definitely not objective enough and it takes me forever to get to the who, what, when, where, why, and hows of a story.

I definitely feel as though I’m leaning more towards creative writing – think screenplays, television shows, and books. And it has been interesting though coming to this conclusion – ironically, half way through a double master’s degree in journalism!

It’s not like I woke up and decided journalism wasn’t for me, but it has been a nagging feeling in the back of my mind for a while. It's something I thought about before which is why I applied and was accepted into a television writing and producing program at the same time the Erasmus Mundus program came along.

Of course, as they say, the grass always looks greener on the other side … but I often wonder where I’d be had I enrolled in that course.

Would I be saying that I can’t see a career in creative writing? Would I look at journalism as a way to salvage my disdain for television writing?

I really don’t know. But point is, I’ve realized my passions lie elsewhere – not that this is the first time though. When I was in grades 9 and 10, I wanted to be a meteorologist and then all of a sudden, in grade 11, I decided working in the media was for me. And we won't even go into the part of me that has always wanted to be a high school media studies teacher.

But anyways, enough about that … so what’s going on here?

Well, for starters, I’m home in about 4.5 weeks. It’s amazing how quickly time has flown by in Amsterdam – it seems like just yesterday I dragged my jet-lagged, Starbucks-craving self off the plane at Schiphol.

Sad news, but my acting class is officially over*

*Cue the single tear I’ve been working on and am actually quite good at!*

This was my first weekend without it and I’ve got to say it felt sort of strange.

Anyways, the second half-term module, The Politics of News, is underway. And yes, for all those York students I took communication studies with, this is the … uhh … third class I’m taking that has that title.

I’m trying a new strategy in this class that I’m hoping pays dividends. I’ve always said one of my best skills is my ability to read people and make solid judgments of character – and I think I’ve read the professor well and determine what works and what doesn’t.

Looking back, I actually think I wasn't on my game during our first course. It's like I let someone knock me off my game and cloud my people reading skills ....

And speaking of the first course, remember how I said that the battle cries have ended? Perhaps I spoke a little prematurely.

They came back in full force recently – mostly because I had requested a full grade breakdown and saw that I got 7.5 out of 10 for class participation!

What’s up with that!?

7.5 for class participation. How can I not score the highest – I’m always talking!

I talk so much that I’m pretty sure that everyone I’ve ever spoken to in my life has at one point or another secretly wished I’d shut up! They’re probably just too nice to say it to my face!

And it’s nothing against the people in my class, but seriously, I spoke and offered my insights a lot more than many of the people who scored a 5.

So, I'm heading to battle over that portion of the grade – frankly, it’s not about the grade, but the principal of the matter. And I suspect why I got that grade I did - seeing their response will let me know if my intuition is true.

And lastly, I thought I’d share with you my new favourite word of the month … unprofessional.

Everything these days is unprofessional. I find it’s an adjective I can use in pretty much every situation. You know, like ...

Late trains are unprofessional.
Long lines at the grocery store are unprofessional.

And my all-time favourite ...

People who arrive late to class ... soooooooo unprofessional!*

*Of course, that’s accompanied by an eye roll and a long mmmmhmmm!*

Uploaded pictures from The Hague

2009-05-11T11:38:00.004-04:00

I have just upload the pictures I took during my day trip to the Peace Palace in The Hague (Den Haag).

Click here to access the photo album or view it below:

I'm all battle cried out ... I think!?

2009-05-10T11:18:00.001-04:00

Seriously! I think I'm battle cried out! I don't know why - maybe I'm just growing up, or maybe I'm losing my Andrew-ness. But either way, this week was definitely a week where I questioned if I'd ever have another "Oh hell no!" moment.

Here's why - let me take you through a fairly eventful week.

Let's start will work, shall we? Overall, it was very productive because I feel like I've meshed right in with the team. I know exactly what I have to do and I'm making sure I'm on top of all the projects I've been given.

But just as I hit my stride, on Wednesday I had to deal with an almost-major disaster. Thankfully I kept my cool!

Originally, two of our lead stories were to be live Q&A sessions with correspondents. 15 minutes before the show went to air, I went down to the studio and told the technician that we would be using two live lines and what numbers I needed him to connect to. Apparently, I needed to tell him about the settings for the connections, so I quickly got them for him and he said everything was fine.

Anyways, 5 minutes before we go to air, I find out that neither of the connections work - keep in mind that I'm an intern acting as the show producer. But with a live show and two presenters in the studio, as clichéd as it sounds, I had to step up. On the fly, I played around with the order, moving packs and pieces here, there, and everywhere!

After going through most of the pre-recorded programme, we were finally are able to connect to both correspondents by telephone, as opposed to ISDN. The quality wasn't as good, but I don't think anybody noticed. Thankfully, the show still had a seamless feel in the broadcast - there was no dead air, just packs that were rearranged.

But after the show, I couldn't help but feel as though I was at fault for not having done more - my Cancerian guilt got the best of me. Plus, all the "Next time, you could've ..." suggestions that I was given implied it too!

And the technician initially outright blamed me for not giving him enough time - he must have completely forgot that he told me everything was okay before the show. But the real kicker was that as he was discussing the situation with one of the producers, he discovered that one of the wires that should have been connected was disconnected - that's why the correspondents could hear us, but we couldn't hear them!

Honestly, between the suggestions and the technician initially blaming me, I felt like shooting back, "Well, it shouldn't have happened in the first place as I'm just an intern!" There was a point when I felt like having a "Hold my sh*t girl!" moment, but I kept quiet because I didn't want to jeopardize anything.

So that was my first almost emergency at work ... and let's hope it's my last.

Anyways, school's sort of back. All these holidays are really messing up my weeks and my usual schedule.

There's not much new, other than we got the grades for our first module. I ended up with a 7.9 after scoring an 8.0 on the final. Converted into the UK system, it works out to a 68% - with the 70%, 75%, and 75% I scored in Denmark, I still have a 72% average, which is enough for distinction in the UK.

Of course, when I first saw my grade, I let out a truly ghetto-fab "Oh hell f*ckin' no!"

Then I began suiting up for battle. I got into the mindset and began putting on my armour - and no, it's not real armour because frankly, I can't pull of the metallic vest look. Instead, my armour is the list of defences I have - such as the lack of transparency in some of the grades.

I also let out a few trademark battle cries, starting with "They do not know what is coming!" and progressively moving my "I hope they're ready because I'm ready to rock their world!”

But about 15 minutes later, the battle cries stopped with my armour only half-ready. My mind returned to work and the article I still had to upload.

At that point, I admitted to myself that in my heart, I already knew that I wouldn't get the grade I wanted and believed I deserved. I had also decided that I need to get over the fact that I'm no longer at the top of the class - at this stage in my career, being close to the top is good enough.

That begs the question - am I still upset about not getting the grade I believe that I should have gotten? That's tough to answer, but ironically, I'm weirdly at peace about it.

If anything, I can say I tried my hardest, did my best ... and if that doesn't work, I still have my personality, style, and imaginary hair extensions* sense to get through life!

*Note: I don't actually have hair extensions - have you seen my haircuts lately? But as Chris Crocker (2007) argues, "Happiness is only a hair flip away!"

Anyways, that's been about it really. An interesting week really - a week where I actually didn't feel like suiting up for battle with people.

Don't worry, I don't actually think I'm losing my edge. I'll still gladly suit up as needed - just think of all the battles I'll fight on behalf of my kids as a helicopter parent. But in the grand scheme of things, I don't think the battles I had this week were worth it.

Besides, I'm okay letting people win battles because I'm all about winning the war.

As I say, history remembers those who win wars, not those who win battles!

There's room for only one Queen around here, hun!

2009-05-03T08:56:00.000-04:00

... that's right! Only room for one Queen in Amsterdam, although I did see a few trying to pull off the look - but, it just didn't work!

So let me tell you about my adventures during Queen's Day in Amsterdam.

Well first things, against my better judgment, I stayed in the city. Originally, I was hoping to travel to Berlin and Prague. But, I had to work the day before and the day after, so it was really pointless to take off - I mean, where could I go for the day?

So I woke up on Thursday and got ready. I already had my outfit pre-selected - orange polo, matching white puka shell bracelet/necklace, jeans, and my orange & blue Phat Farm shoes with orange laces. Along with my big sunglasses, I looked great and matchy-matchy - I figured that even if I hated what was going on downtown, as long as I looked good, everything would be okay.

I set off and decided to take the train downtown. That was my first mistake. The fact that it was a good 15-20 minutes late should have signalled a warning bell.

When it finally arrived, it was full. And I don't mean GO Train at 5:30pm from Toronto Union kind of full, I mean TTC subway kind of full. You know, the kind of full where people are so close that when they move their hands, it's borderline sexual assault - it's one of those times that yelling out "I like you, but not in that way!" is okay!

Oh well ... rather than fight to get on, I let everyone else try and pack on the train before I boarded - I knew it'd be a lot easier if I was standing next to the door. Only some guy had to ruin it by quickly jumping on and taking my spot. He got my first glaredown of the day.

And thank goodness I have my lo-cal days and superb balance from my days tumbling on the balance beam, as I managed to get on, ride, and get off the train without touching anything or anybody. When we finally pulled into central station, I was relieved to get off - mostly because people were just all up in my space and as a typical NA'er, I love my personal space bubble.

Central station would prove to be the first of many battles with crowds. It took me a good 20 minutes to get out of the station. Nobody was walking and everyone was just standing there, yelling at the top of their lungs, and having their photos taken. Naturally, I kept it glamorous and fierce and patiently waited for the hooligans to get their act together.

Outside wasn't much better, but since I was already this far, there was no sense in turning back. So I began walking towards the shopping area and the first thing I noticed was how dirty the ground was. There was everything from beer cars and bottles to chicken bones to feathers. Did everybody forget about throwing their trash in the garbage bins and not on the ground?

Anyways, I decided to head towards Noordmarkt, one of the usual spots I head to after my acting class on Saturday. I passed this dog wearing sunglasses trying to pull off the cracked-out celebrity look - it was a little too wannabe Boho chic sitting in a jazz cafe sipping a latte in Prague.

I also saw an interesting concept for portables, which I'm used to seeing double as classrooms. The police were using them as their lookout points, which I thought was a pretty neat idea. Of course, I felt bad for some of the scantily dressed ladies walking by because I heard a few catcalls - one girl even stopped and proceeded to flirt with this one cop for a good 10 minutes.

I finally made it to Prisengracht and figured I should at least walk part of it to see how crazy it is - and it didn't disappoint. It was insanity.

Near the top of the canal was a group of wannabe Amy Winehouse's trying to lip synch. Sadly, it just didn't work and I swear the girls were fighting amongst themselves for who got to sing the lead.

I also ran into a few drag acts posing as the Queen - one actually had half decent makeup and I was moderately impressed.

One thing I noticed along the canal was the vrijmarkt concept. Essentially, people bring out their old stuff and barter on the street. My grandmother would be proud as I dutifully scanned all the stuff for sale, looking for something that looked valuable and worthy of an appearance on Antique's Roadshow.

Sadly, I didn't find anything like that. But I did pick up an adorable baby-sized Starbucks cup for my future child. The way I look at it, you might as well get them addicted to caffeine when they're young - then they won't turn to drugs or alcohol! Seriously, it's parenting at its best!

At about 4:30pm, I decided to head home because I knew it would take me a good two hours to get home - of course, I'm so cheap that rather than take an 8 minute train ride that costs 1.40 euros, I'd spend two hours walking home for free.

I made the major mistake of deciding to walk through Rembrantplein. It took me about an hour to make it from one side of the square to the other - it was wall-to-wall people.

And it's also the site of my almost "hold my sh*t" moment.

Long story short, this idiot beside me decides he wants to start smoking pot and blows his smoke into my face. Because I hate the stuff, never touched it, and think it smells like ass, I turned and asked him not to do it again. He then tried to start this whole thing with me - you know, the "Oh, you're black so you must do it to!" kind of thing.

Obviously, he isn't aware that I can 'go street' if I have to. I quickly shot back that just because I'm part Caribbean doesn't mean I'm a pot head - of course, I also shot him a trademark glaredown just so I knew he go the message.

I think he was too gone to even know what to say so he took another puff and blew it in another direction. This time, a woman yelled at him and he got the message, put his joint out, and tried to walk in the opposite direction - I could sense his embarrassment and as he walked away I thought it was the perfect moment for a hair flip ... if only I had hair!

So after that, I continued to wade through Rembrandtplein and I saw that a couple were trying to push their baby stroller through the crowd - yeah, big mistake!

All of a sudden, it's lifted up and the stroller is now crowd surfing just like a beach ball. At that point, I was only worried if the baby was still there but thankfully, he wasn't. The parents weren't very happy but there wasn't anything to do - in about 5 minutes, it had made its way to the other side of the square.

An hour later, I finally made it out of Rembrantplein and began walking home. I stopped and took a video on the very-busy Amstel. For my Toronto-based friends, there were so many boats on the river, it was like the DVP/401 interchange at 8am on a Monday morning - just pure chaos!

I made my way through the crowds and towards one of the main streets in my area, Middenweg, and noticed that people were still selling their stuff. There wasn't anything that screamed "Buy me!" so I kept walking.

But then I came across a mound of stuff that was just sitting there begging for me to rummage through it. So in true ghetto fab fashion, I put on my sunglasses, made sure nobody recognized me, and started picking through the pile. I realized soon that none of the stuff was for me - the clothes were too 80s, too big, and too ugly, and the home furnishings were broken.

So instead, I put my skills to use and helped a man picking through the stuff for clothes. I figure if you're going to wear outdated and over-sized clothes, at least be matchy-matchy!

When I finally got home, I was so tired I could barely walk up the stairs. Being around tons of people and having to navigate through a sea of party-goers is tough work - and at 22, I'm too old for that!

So that was my Queen's Day - nothing overly exciting. Even though I contemplated going away, I'm glad I didn't. I've done it once, although I can't say I'll do it again.

Then again, if Queen Beatrix would like to invite me to next year's celebrations to talk about my role in the royal family as an adopted son/next-in-line-to-the-throne, I'd be down for that!

Beatrix, call me hun! You know the number!

Hercules is boring ... Héřçülèß is so much better!

2009-04-30T17:14:00.001-04:00

That's right, I've changed my last name. Frankly, Hercules is just so boring - I'm sick of always getting the "Hercules! Hercules!" Eddie Murphy-inspired clap. And don't even get me started on the people who see "Hercules" and expect me to be some sort of strong man - we all know I'm too skinny, weight-conscious, and lo-cal for that!

But anyways, I've decided to spice up my name. I had so much free time during our two week methods course - which I'll get in to later - that I changed my last name to reflect the vast array of ethnic heritages I have.

It all started when I asked my home girl Nora what the ß sign in German means - I totally thought it was a 'b' sound because it looks like a funky 'b'. Of course, it's not a 'b' sound, but actually a sharp 's' - and it's not just sharp, but sassy and fierce as well! And I love letters with those three characteristics!

So that's what started the whole new last name makeover. Of course, then I got into the whole thing about needing a last name that reflects all my diverse heritages - yes, the real and the fake ones. Like owing to the fact that I imagine that I can fluently parlez de la francais, I added an accented 'e'.

And to coincide with my new last name, I've also recently become a lo-cal German.
Now, for those who don't know about my lo-cal/hi-cal distinctions, it has nothing to do with calories. Instead, I've started categorizing people based on how hyperbolic their nationalism is.

Again, I can thank my home girl Nora for this. We're both lo-cal Germans - we're Eurosceptic, not the biggest fans of Angie Merkel or her fashion sense, and think that the Deutsche mark is the way to go!

Oddly enough I've never actually used a Deutsche mark to pay for anything, but I think it's time for Europe to have a little diversity with its money - and let's be honest, the euro is just so 2004!

And don't worry, I'm still a lo-cal Americ ... I mean Canadian too! I ain't giving up that passport easily - seriously, it's like a free ride 'round the world!

Okay, so enough about my last name and ever-changing ethnic identity. Let me give you a quick recap of the last two weeks.

Two words spring to mind ... methods workshop!

Frankly, it was completely useless for me. The content was fairly mundane and basic - it was a repeat of what I learned reading the first two chapters in the Psychology 101 book I have at home.

At least the teacher was okay - although I definitely have my reservations about one of the lecturers. Let's just say he was on el majoro de l'ego trippo!

And since I'm such a good judge of character, I'll just come out and say it ...

I definitely see issues with him later on. Something just didn't quite sit well with me and it's not that I'm prejudging - okay, technically I am - but it's a gut feeling I have.

Oh and side-note/question to the UvA ... why do you insist on this weirdly paternalistic, patronizing, and parochial relationship with us as Masters students? *

*For some reason, I was in a mood for three words that started with 'p'!

This two week course should definitely have been optional. I would have preferred to work during the two weeks, or even better, to have classes end two weeks early so I could've taken the EW internship in LA.

But whatever, I don't make the rules.

What else? I finally saw Gran Torino last Friday. It's an awesome movie and I'm shocked by its Oscar snub - then again, it's incredibly racist dialogue is probably too racy for the Academy.

* Note to self: Ensure that Oscar-worthy performance and screenplay don't have any racial epithets *

Even though it's a great movie, I still consider Changeling to be my pick for the best movie of 2008. Ironically, both have some sort of Clint Eastwood connection - who knew I'd enjoy movies made by a Hollywood Republican so much?!

And what else? ... hmmmm ...

My theatre class is still going great, although we only have 3 more classes - I definitely want to take something acting-related in London. You know, because I'd love a walk-on role on Corrie Street or East Enders - I'm just that British!

Other than that, I'm back at work and so excited to be back. Frankly, I missed my weekly routine - and honestly, work made time fly by so fast!

Oh, and in a few days, I'll post my Queen's Day recap - let's just say that it was an interesting 5 hours I spent walking downtown!

And yes, there were definitely a few mmmhmmm's, a number of trademark over-the-glasses glares ... and almost a "hold my sh*t" moment!

Stay tuned!

This is why they need to teach Fashion 101 to everyone ...

2009-04-19T17:46:00.000-04:00

Okay ... time for a rant!

I love that it’s finally getting warmer and sunnier in Amsterdam – and that means it's time for summer clothes. But seriously, walking through Amsterdam on a warm day is like wading through a sea of horrible fashion – and I always feel like I'm drowning!

Frankly, I’m sick and tired of walking around and having my eyes assaulted by various crimes against fashion. No joke – every Saturday, as I stroll through downtown on my way to my acting class, I experience at least 20 various visual assaults from both men and women, young and old.

So, we need to cover a few basics – and let’s begin with the most basic of all summer fashion … sandals.

They are, in my opinion, the best part of summer – they’re easy and they go with everything. But wearing them comes with great responsibility.

If you're going to wear a sandal, make sure your feet look good – that's why pedicures were invented! Don't be cheap ... pay the 35 euros and get your feet into tip-top sandal shape – and keep them that way with a pumice stone.

And for the guys, don't think you're above this – take care of your feet. Statistics show that 99.98% of women either openly or secretly hate men with bad feet – and yes, I can prove this with an SPSS frequency table!

Now, let’s get serious for a second and talk about the cardinal summer fashion rule – no socks and sandals! They do not go together – it's like me and manual labour ... they aren't meant to be anywhere near each other! And if it it’s cold enough to warrant socks, then it's too cold for sandals – plain and simple!

Seriously, every time I see this, I want to gauge my eyes out. But then I just settle for giving the offender my trademark glare of disapproval – you know, the one where I look over my sunglasses, do a quick up-and-down and give one long "mmmmmhmmmmm"! It's like my own patented glare of death!

But sadly, this isn’t a problem that only affects the “middle aged father with 2 kids on vacation carrying around an ugly fanny pack” population – I’ve seen students in their 20s trying and pull this look off! Obviously, they've been spending too much time reading Plato – would it kill you to pick up a Vogue now and then, even for five minutes?

Okay ... moving on to the second most basic item for summer – skirts/shorts.

Ladies, don't go too short unless you know you can pull it off – there is clothing out there for women of all shapes and sizes ... so stop shopping in the juniors department of H&M and find something age and body-type appropriate! And remember, let's keep VPL and camel toe to a minimum, shall we?

Now, as for skirts, if you're doing a mini or micro-mini skirt, then for the love of god, please wear underwear – pulling a Britney/Lindsay/Paris-inspired firecrotch look is soooooo 2007! Frankly, I’d like to keep Amsterdam a vajayjay free zone and I'm sure you don't want to get home to discover you somehow got pregnant!

*cue eye roll and a long mmmhmmm*

As for the guys, one simple rule – don’t go for anything shorter than knee-length. If you do, you will feel overexposed (trust me!) and you’ll create the illusion that you have chicken legs. Seriously, let's do the math Andrew-style ...

gangly limbs + thigh-length pleated (kill me now!) shorts = chicken legs

Now, speaking of legs, let’s talk about one key topic – leg hair.

Ladies, don't shave it off – scars, scabs, and blood-stained tissues clinging to your legs as you ride the tram is not sexy! Waxing is a lot better – simple as that!

And gents, leg hair, like back and chest hair is so 1980s. Wax it off! Or, if you're scared that somehow you'll lose your masculinity, then trim it down with a manscaping tool. You can buy a fairly decent trimmer for 20 euros – yes, that will mean having 5 less beers with your buddies on the weekend, but it will be worth it!

And again, for the guys, here's another Andrew-style math formula ...

less body hair = the illusion of more muscle definition = more looks from fellow beach patrons = more potential for a date on Saturday night = ...*

*Well you get the idea!

Now, this last point isn’t so much fashion-related as car-related.

Quite simply, don’t blast the music as you drive down the street – and don't crank the volume as you wait at a traffic light either!

Newsflash ... nobody cares! And frankly, unless it’s top 40 hits, nobody wants to hear it!

It’s just incredibly tacky (and frankly depressing!) seeing all these wannabes in their small, rusted, beat-up cars trying to look all gangster! Seriously, just stop ... you're embarrassing yourself!

So there you have it – just a few of my main fashion and car-related rules for the summer. Take them for what they’re worth – random ramblings from someone who has too much free time and cares too much!

But beware, you never know where I’m lurking and if I’ll magically appear with an eye-roll and an “Oh hun, what’s going on here?”

... because then you're in trouble!

I can hardly wait for ... ugh ... research methods!

2009-04-13T14:17:00.001-04:00

Let me go all Dr. Phil and be honest for a second.

My name is Andrew Hercules, I'm Americ ... I mean Canadian, I care too much and I just love research methods.

*Note my overly sarcastic tone with that last point

But seriously the prospect of a two-week, 3 times/week, 6 hours/day course just makes my day ... no week ... no, it makes my month!

*Again with the sarcasm

Of course, my sarcastic interludes functioned as a commercial break and we're back now with confession time.

The old, nerdy Andrew (circa grade 6 through 10) would have been really excited about this math-inspired course - numbers, formulas and theorems were my drug of choice back then. Sadly, I grew up, gained a sense of style, and decided I wanted to be on TV and so the excitement is gone - plus, my new addictions are long dashes and ellipsis points.

But whatever, I'll grin and bear it for the two weeks. Although I will have to keep my sarcasm in check because it caused me a little trouble during the last math class I took. Not to worry though, I will still offer my trademark "mmmhmmm ... mmmhmmm ... mmmhmmm" with varying levels of loudness, sarcasm, and accompanying eye-rolls.

And as I've said before, the course will be completely useless for me - you know I'm never going to actually use anything I learned. And if I have to, I'll just hire someone to do it for me. After all, that's why credit cards were invented - so lazy people like me don't have to do hard, manual labour or solve complex math equations.

Anyways, back into focus ... the past week went by so quickly - and looking back, I can't believe I've already spent 10 weeks here. Time's really flying by! The week started with me writing my first paper here and I'm not completely happy with it - I was really unmotivated to do it, mostly because I stopped caring.

And despite my protests, I still uploaded it via Ephorus. But note to the University of Amsterdam: review your reliance on the software. For one thing, it can easily be 100% bypassed - if I can do it, anybody can. Plus, it automatically assumes that students cheat and not everyone does - some of us rely on our looks, fashion sense, and charm to get a good grade. And of course, there's major copyright concerns - not about who owns it but whether or not the fair use or fair dealing principles are violated.

But whatever, what's done is done and by handing it in, I go to say "buh-bye!" to more than just the paper!

My internship is still going really well, despite a few teamwork-related issues that I'm not involved with - you know, I'm trying to keep my life a drama-free zone! Anyways, I've definitely found my niche during the press review. I think I'm pretty good at it - mostly because it's a chance to ad lib and converse with the hosts on soft news, which is my forte.

My acting class is still going great. This week was supposed to be our last class, but we are continuing for another 5 weeks. Not that I'm planning on becoming an actor anytime soon, but it's just a fun way to de-stress from the week and learn something new.

And on Saturday, I finally bought myself a new bag, which I'll debut sometime in the next two weeks. I felt as though I'd put up with a lot over the last 10 weeks and I'm way ahead with my personal budget, so I gave myself a treat - of course, I spent a good 30 minutes deciding whether or not I really deserved it. But I bought it and I'm glad I did - I really like it and now I can change it up as my H&M bag is getting a little old.

So really, that's about it - nothing overly exciting or scandalous.

But as a special treat, I will be uploading a special, fashion-inspired posting in the next few days. I've been seeing some major fashion disasters here in Amsterdam as the weather gets warmer.

I definitely be offering my two cents on what's going wrong - frankly, I see fashion crimes happening every day and obviously the Amsterdam Fashion Police aren't doing their jobs properly!

Then again, things like this are better left to professionals anyways ...

Freedom, flip flops, and fame ... my life is complete!

2009-04-04T15:02:00.000-04:00

Alrighty, so it's been a few weeks since I updated this. I really should go back to making a weekly posting - it saves me having to tell the same story over and over again.

And we all know how much I love telling stories ... okay not telling them so much as hearing about them, giving an occasional nod of approval (or the dreaded look de disapproval avec les glasses), and taking strategically-timed commercial breaks!

So what's gone on since my last update?

Well for starters, I've got freedom! Our first module is done and I couldn't be happier. I'm just glad to be done with it. But more importantly, I'm proud that for the last few weeks, I've stopped caring about every little detail and just focused on doing my thing.

Of course, I don't know if that will hold true when our final grades our released. Mine had better be at least an 8.0, otherwise ... I'll start caring again!

And it's ironic that the ending of the module coincides with the weather in Amsterdam finally getting better! I was getting really tired of all the rain, wind, and gray (despite it being my favourite colour). It just made everything so depressing and bleak and blah.

Thankfully, we had a few sunny days here and there. And it seemed that once we changed our clocks and skipped ahead an hour, we entered a new climate. All of a sudden, it was sunny and fairly warm - then again, I'm Canadian and we consider anything about +10 degrees Celsius a heatwave!

But you know what sun and warm weather means ... flip flop weather is coming soon. Just like ellipsis points and long dashes, I love and have an addiction to flip flops - they are easy, they go with everything, and they come in practically every colour! And I think after cramming my feet into shoes that are a size too small for most of winter, my toes could do with the break!

I just hope I can wear sandals at work. Then again, the last time I did, I had a major "don't go there!" moment with a colleague and eventually wrote a blog posting about it - and yes, for those interested, I think she learned her lesson!

But here's the biggest news ... I've started doing on-air work at Radio Netherlands! I'm slowly gaining fame in Amsterdam.

Right now, I'm now doing the music and/or press review segments of the show. It was really just a matter of time until I started - there was something about interns and whether or not they can do on-air work, but whatever. I'm now broadcasting my thoughts on the latest bands or the quirky side of the European press - it's definitely my niche, especially when I have a good 4 or 5 minutes for the press review.

But the best part is that I'm slowly making it in Canada ... very sloooooooooowly! A few days ago, my former Danforth coworker and fellow Asian Sensation Wendy told me that her friend heard my voice on CBC Radio Overnight. And no, I'm not doing some late night sex chat or call-in show (I can only wish!) but they are repeating our daily Network Europe programme.

So technically, I'm already being broadcast on the CBC but they just don't know it yet. And maybe when the economy recovers and they start filling up their schedule with new programming, I can just slip right in and host my talk show - move over Steven & Chris, there's a new show in town!

Anyways, despite my new on-air presence, I still can't get into the CBC. That's right, I'm willing to offer the Canadian national broadcaster my FREE labour for two months, but they don't seem interested. Honestly, three weeks ago I sent an e-mail to HR asking simple questions and still no response.

Seriously, if I ever make it big (gotta hold out hope!), I can't wait to turn around to all the media outlets in Canada that shunned me and tell them, "I told you so!" For the amount of problems I've had trying to break into the industry in Canada, I don't even know if I want my show to be Canadian-based anymore - but don't worry, you won't be seeing me on US-based FOX anytime soon, I'm aiming for a classy late night chat show on the Beeb!

So remember, if you happen to be up at 1:05am on a Tuesday, Thursday or Saturday morning and tuned into CBC radio - for whatever reason, I won't judge you I promise - you'll most likely hear me!

Gosh, I sound like such a fame whore! But whatever, just like Paris Hilton, I'll take whatever I can get - even if it's just a fleeting 15 minutes of fame!!

My name is Andrew Hercules and I care too much!

2009-03-15T12:44:00.000-04:00

So, another two weeks down in Amsterdam ... only, ummm, well let’s just say that it’s still a long time to go.

Again, it’s been fairly uneventful on the school front – nothing really too interesting going on. But for those of you in the know, I will say this … I think that certain recent events have made my point very clear!

And my internship is still going good – I don’t know if it’s the honeymoon phase or what, but I really like the team I’m working with. Everyone’s got their own little special area and thing they do. I’ve been learning lots, but also contributing my ideas – you know me, I’ve always got something to say about everything!

Anyways, the highlight of the last two weeks was our “field trip” to Brussels – seriously, every time I told someone I was going on a field trip, I felt like I was in grade 2 again. You know, having to find partners and hold hands as you board the bus.

Of course, that brought back memories of being the nerd with big glasses and ugly shoes that was so uncool! Nobody ever wanted to be my partner ...

*Single tear*

Anyways, enough of the sad memories from grade school.

Bringing it back into focus ... a group of us decided to go to Brussels on Sunday to check out the city. Of course, we couldn’t leave Amsterdam without a little drama involving my homegirl from Diemen, Carmel, a rainy morning, and a bus driver who's obviously blind and stupid.

Loooooooong story short, the bus driver drove off without picking up Carmel, despite the fact that she was standing with her hand up at the bus stop. But she handled it like a true *DIVA* – I think I had a single tear moment as she cussed out the bus driver.

Anyways, the bus ride was pretty blah. And of course, I forgot to buy a few slag mags and the only magazine on board was The Economist, which I just couldn't wait to read so I could throw around fancy finance terms!

Thankfully I only made it to page 3 of the magazine before we arrived in Brussels. We found our hostel and decided to venture out downtown and see the city. Frankly, it’s pretty bland – it reminds me of Ottawa because it’s all government and everything seems to shut down on the weekend.

But we managed to find this somewhat famous fries place, and yes, I had fries – in fact, the whole weekend was hi-cal. I also had not one, but two Belgian waffles – one with whipped cream and chocolate sauce (major caloric mistake), and the other with butterscotch sauce. Needless to say, I followed up this weekend with two extra lo-cal days!

Now, the real reason we went to Brussels was to see the European Commission and talk to people involved in the media. But the whole visit was mixed at best.

It started out good with a presentation on the EU. Not that I'm in love with the EU, but it's interesting seeing the successes and failures of supranational governance – yet, I’ll probably never see it because I doubt the US would ever give up its power to join a North American Union. Instead, they’d just swallow us up – wait, haven’t they done that already?!

Once that presentation was over, we ended up waiting like an hour in front of the security gates. Originally, we were supposed to see the daily press briefing, but that didn’t happen. Instead, we stood outside waiting for like 45 minutes – although it wasn’t all lost, as I found out that a certain someone reads my blog. Then again, I could care less because my mantra is that whatever I say in a posting is what I’d say face-to-face.

Anyways, the third presentation was from one of the EC’s spokespeople. It was interesting hearing about how long his day is and what he has to do. Sadly, he only talked about print, which I thought was interesting, given that broadcast is a very unforgiving medium.

The fourth presentation though was by far the most controversial. The guy said he was sceptical of social science because its research can prove/disprove anything. Of course, some people took offense, but I actually agreed with him – depending on what you research is, a social scientist can skew their study in a particular way to obtain particular results.

We also had a quick visit the Brussels Press Centre which wasn’t all that exciting. I think by the end of the day, I was just so tired of a trip that was disorganized and hectic. And interestingly enough, we were invited to come back just to see the things we couldn’t (i.e. the press conference) but on the EU’s dime. Even though it’s free, I’ll have to think about that offer and get back to you!

Outside of that, it was a fairly uneventful two weeks. And of course, my acting class is still the highlight of my week.

Like yesterday, we had a class entirely on impulses. It was really weird. We did this one exercise where I felt like I had a massive freakout as everyone watched - think of the type of freakout a mom would have if her kid was missing and multiply that by a few hundred!

Apparently though, I internalized the impulse too much and that meant I had to do it again. For most people, this exercise gets physical and aggressive and you know me, I'm a lover, not a fighter (except when it comes to a war of words) so it was definitely difficult – and it’s not like I could outsource the violence like I do back home!

Honestly, the whole class was so out of character for me that I'm sure if anybody watched it, they wouldn't have recognized me. But then again, that's the main reason why I'm taking this course - I really want to push boundaries and do things I've never done before.

And in keeping with my new after-CREA tradition, I had kung pao chicken and spring rolls courtesy of Carmel and one of my unpaid interns to the intern, Vicky. It was great and it totally reminded me of this great Chinese restaurant in Toronto, Danforth Dragon. And yes, I did eat because I figured that I’d had enough lo-cal days during the week and I deserved to treat myself – plus, I was absolutely emotionally exhausted from my acting class.

So yeah … what else?

On the Toronto internship front, I'm still trying to convince the CBC to hire me. You'd think a broadcast organization facing a financial shortfall and possible staff cuts would be jumping at the chance to hire someone for free for two months. Obviously, the CBC doesn't yet see the value of free labour!

Oh and I've got a new phrase!

This one applies for everything that I don't like and/or spend too much time thinking about. I came up with it after starting a new rehab group with my fellow blonde Californian, Christina. It’s called Caring Too Much Anonymous (CTMA).

And the first step is admitting you have a problem, so here goes …

"My name is Andrew Hercules and I care too much"

But don’t worry, I’m still using “Luv ya longtime”!

And yes, even though I’ve started this rehab group, I’ll still be visiting Promises Rehab Centre in Malibu at least once – I mean, c’mon, I have a full-blown addiction to long dashes (–) and ellipsis points (…).

Seriously, count how many times those things appear in this post!

It’s an addiction I tell ya!

Things are looking better ... and who knew I could write news stories!

2009-03-01T13:31:00.005-05:00

Seriously, they really are. After all, if the internship didn't go through, I'd probably be writing this posting from Schiphol airport as I patiently wait for my KLM flight to commence boarding.

But don't worry - I'm safely writing this from the comfort of my east-Amsterdam studio apartment.

Anyways, this week has been really exciting.

Starting with Sunday - I did a 5-movie marathon at the local movie theatre.

I started with Slumdog Millionaire and I was impressed, but parts of the movie are disturbing. I knew about the poverty in Mumbai, having previously done an essay on Dharavi. But parts of the movie were upsetting and you know I had a ton of questions for my fellow CIC + G members, which they thankfully answered.

Then I saw Changeling, which gets my vote for best movie of 2008. The place in which Angelina Jolie had to get to in order to play the role is truly stunning. And to be able to do that while having her own children is all the more remarkable. While it's a very disturbing movie, I learned a lot about the crimes - and of course, I spent a lot of time contemplating what I would've done if it was my own child, heck, even if it was my 9 year old brother (*knock on wood*). I'd probably have gone even more psychotic, to the point that I'm sure I'd be placed in a medically-induced comatose state.

Frost-Nixon was up next and I have mixed feelings about it. I love the guy that played David Frost because he's the same guy who played Tony Blair in The Queen. I just found it dragged a bit in the middle - I was hoping for something with a little more drama.

The Visitor was a surprising favourite of mine. The plot is interesting and the acting by the main character is great - he plays the grouchy old professor part to a tee, much like one of the professors I have right now. Plus, the movie does not have your typical Hollywood ending, but it's a lot better the surprise thrown at you at the end of Vaughniston's The Break Up.

Finally, I also saw Revolutionary Road, but by that time, I was so conked out, I didn't really pay that much attention. Honestly, I was still focused on the first two movies I saw and I probably spent more time forming questions in my mind than actually watching the movie.

But nonetheless, it was nice to be able to watch all the movies, since it's something I'd do back home. And it was a great way to spend a Sunday and it only cost 25 euros - not too bad!

Of course, I made the mistake of having McDonald's for dinner and I won't be doing that ever again - but don't worry, I had a low-cal day on Monday to make up for it!

Anyways, speaking on Monday, this was my first full week at Radio Netherlands and I'm really loving it.

The people I work with are great. Even though they have to produce a daily show, they've really taken the time to help me learn new things, especially since I've always said that I'd never do news because I'm just the on-air talent. But I think I'm slowly learning the ins and outs of reporting news - aren't you proud of me?!

So far, there haven't been any issues, except for the time I went to see someone in Human Resources. Turns out I didn't pronounce someone's name correctly - and by correctly, I mean with the Dutch accent. This guy had the nerve to actually correct me and so I did what I always do - I flashed my Canadian passport and was like, "Give me a break, I've been here for less than a month!"

Turns out the guy is some high-ranking person in the HR department, but whatever - he needs to understand how I work! And I was thinking of even giving him a little *snap* but I'll save the ghetto fab until I really need it.

But like I said, I really have been learning lots - how to edit audio with Dalet, searching through the news wires on Team News. These are all skills that look great on my resume - so great that I'm pursuing a summer internship at Canada's public broadcaster, the CBC.

The one thing I really like is that they're okay with me focusing a lot on their website. It has tons of potential to be really interactive. Plus, writing news stories is another skill for the good ol' resume!

While I probably won't be on air, I'll still be involved in the show behind-the-scenes. Like on Monday, I produced their 3-minute Oscar segment - which, let's be honest, is right up my alley! I definitely could have gone on-air, but apparently, there's some rule that prevents me from doing so - whatever ... I'm okay with breaking some rules!

For those interested, here are some of the stories I've written - and any feedback (good or bad) is much appreciated!

Billions in bailouts for Eastern Europe

Basque country goes to the ballot box

Russian billionaires feel the pinch

Venice mayor under fire for Coke deal

Anyways, on Tuesday I also ventured out to the Gevleveg area and got to see first-hand what container living is like - and I'm not a fan. I think I'd go crazy - the walls are so thin. You can hear everything and given what my life was like back in Aarhus, I'll take my eerily quiet apartment complex over a livelier, container-inspired one anyday!

And on Saturday, I had my acting class, which I really like. It's nice to have something to look forward to on the weekend and I like my Saturday schedule.

Anyways, in class we did an improv exercise and I think I did really well. In one scene, I played the best friend of the smartest girl in class. I start drama between my friend and this guy she's interested in by telling her that she failed biology because the guy plagiarized her work.

The part was pretty much me in a nutshell - and it turns out that the guy (Chris) actually was pretty pissed off at me. So I guess I really inspired him to get in touch with his inner hatred.

That was highlight one for Saturday. The other highlight was visiting my new favourite coffee store, Bagels & Beans with my homegirl from Diemen, Carmel. We had lattes, she had a muffin, and I had a bagel with bananas, pecans, cinnamon and maple syrup. It was fun and we ended up being the last to leave the store!

So what's been about it for this week - like I said, I really like my internship and it'll make my time in Amsterdam fly by really quickly. I already can't believe that a month has gone by!

And for those at home interested, I will be coming back to Toronto for the summer. Turns out that the UK won't let me intern over the summer, so I'm now turning my attention towards the CBC.

Hopefully, I can land a two-month position with them - because once I do, it'll be so easy to sell my talk show idea to them! I mean, just give me 5 minutes with their VP of programming and it's a done deal!

And if so, that means I'm fully on track for my latest deadline - I'm determined to have my first daytime Emmy and Gemini win by the time I'm 30!

My Oscar win can wait until I'm 35 - you know, because I still have to work on that speech!

I'm back ... not that I ever left!

2009-02-20T13:02:00.005-05:00

I know I haven't updated my blog in a few weeks, and I apologize for that. I've been very busy getting settled. And honestly, I've also been unhappy and just not feeling like my usual self.

So, in true fashion, this posting will be honest - and a little long!

For starters, if you don't already know, I arrived safely. I'm not impressed with British Airways and I don't know if I'd fly with them again - I still like Air Canada better, although only because I get Aeroplan miles!

During my first week here, it seemed like I was running around doing errands, getting settled, and trying to weave my way through Dutch bureaucracy. Like at the office for my housing corporation, they gave me a hassle because I didn't have the correct form filled in and they didn't know that the person I'm subletting from is going on an exchange. And so they refused to sign the lease - of course, this is happening two days before I meet with the immigration authorities.

I tried using my charm (and even waving my Canadian passport) and shockingly, it didn't work! So I resorted to tactic #2 - an all-out bitchfest. That seemed to work and they agreed to sign it, but not before telling me that they were doing me a huge favour that they wouldn't do for anybody else.

I was like, "You're kidding me - I should be honoured that you are doing your job? Give me a break!" *

* Maybe that was a little too sassy, but whatever, they deserved it.

I also saw a bit of the city during my first week. I walked around the city centre a lot, just so I could get acquainted with the stores and where they are. And yes, I've seen the Red Light District and no, I'm not impressed and/or interested in anything that's going on there - but more importantly, I cannot let that part of town cloud my judgement of Amsterdam because it really is a nice city, even if parts of it reek of pot.

Anyways, our classes started in the second week, and it's been a mixed bag so far. I like my Thursday class because I like the content and the professor seems nice - I gave him a 30-second once over and he passed, although he could do with a few style improvements.

But my other class on Tuesday is absolutely horrible. The content is boring, the professor isn't dynamic, the TA seems like she's on a power trip and my group has a shorter assignment deadline than the other group.

As it now stands, our group gets 2 days less to do the same assignment. I brought up the issue in class, but I was told a host of reasons why the deadline sticks - everything from the "We deserve a weekend break!" to the "Well, we do need to print off the documents by 5pm" excuses. Talk about lame - their excuses just flat-out sucked!

But to make it worse, when I approached the programme coordinator about this, she was incredibly condescending to me. In a nutshell, she told me that I don't have a valid argument and that she doesn't know how I have the time to intern for 2 or 3 days a week. According to her, the programme is failing me and/or I'm not trying hard enough.

Excuse me! Since when is it any of your business what I do with my free time. And you're talking to someone who had one of the highest averages in Aarhus, so I obviously know how to manage my time and write a good essay.

Honestly though, her attitude put me in a really bad spot. I mean, I can handle rude people, after all, I have worked in a social services office before. But her tone of voice and choice of words really didn't sit well with me - there was no reason for her to be like that. Part of me wanted to suit up and go to battle with her, but knowing that her and I will never get along, frankly, it's a waste of my time.

So that, combined with the deadline issue, and my general disinterest in some of the cotent made me want to leave. And I know I talked about it before, but given the things I've been working on back in Toronto, it seemed as though I had more opportunities to broaden my horizons if I left the programme and went back home.

And so I decided that I was going to fly home on March 1. I guess I had hoped that Amsterdam would have made up for some of the programme's shortcomings in Aarhus, but it hasn't so far.

But before I made a decision, I spoke some of my friends and one of them asked me straight out, "Are you happy?" Of course, being me, I said I was and tried to change the subject, but she can see through my BS and called me out on it.

Then I admitted I wasn't, but more importantly, I started asking myself some tough questions, which for me is a bit of a role-reversal since I'm usually the one asking the tough Dr. Phil-esque questions and handing out advice.

And so I asked myself ...

Maybe I expect to much?

Maybe I'm too used to the client-patron relationship at my old university and I'm disappointed that the programme isn't meeting my specific needs, as weird as they might be?

Am I being self-centred? Perhaps, although I'd like to think not. I prefer to see it as though I'm just trying to get the most out of this programme and the opportunity, but I'm sure some might see it as an example of a "ME-ME-ME mentality".

But there are two things that saved me from boarding the flight.

One is my acting class on Saturday. So far, the class has definitely been worth the 75 Euros it cost. I'm learning a lot, like how to turn my mind off and just go with it.

The best part though is that the teacher is tough - she knows when you are 'fake' acting and she'll call you out on it. At first, I was really worried, you know, because I've fake acted before - haven't we all? But her feedback has taught me how to get in touch with my senses and just feel without thinking. It's really opened my eyes - so much so that I find myself listening to music with a different mindset now.

But the best thing I've done so far is landing an internship at Radio Netherlands, the Dutch public broadcaster.

Back in December, I contacted RNW and asked them about internship opportunities. A few days later, the head of the English department asked for a resume and he forwarded it to the editor of their arts, culture and politics programme, who in turn called me for a quick chat/interview to figure out how they could best utilize my skills.

It seemed as though things were going to plan until I found out that internships need to be part of your school programme and there is no way that our programme coordinator would support my internship application.

And so I went back to thinking about packing again. And then I got bummed out because I hate when things are so close, yet so far. I really worked hard to get this internship and it seemed as though it was slipping through my fingers. It honestly seemed like that was my life trend - jobs, people, things just slipping through my fingers, despite all the effort and work I've put in.

But luckily, the rules didn't apply because I'm technically on an exchange and I don't really have a home university. Perhaps my life trend is reversed now - and not a moment too soon because I don't want my job as Oprah's replacement to slip through my grasp!

And so, I start on Monday and I'll be working 3 days a week - it's a lot, but I like being busy and it will make the time fly by quickly. Plus, they are willing to train me on systems I haven't used before, like iDalet, and I'll have the chance to produce and do some on-air segments. And I get paid a small stipend which covers my travel, so I can't complain.

So things are looking up, after I was feeling pretty down. I'll be staying put - no flight back home, no summer job, and no Ryerson for me. Getting the internship, and my acting class have convinced me to stay - and now, I'm feeling better, happier, and more like the old Andrew.

And so for all of you who have read my blog, luv y'all longtime!

And yes, I'll start venturing out a night too - you know, to share tips with the ladies of the Red Light District

;-)

The eagle has landed ... in Amsterdam that is!

2009-02-03T13:40:00.000-05:00

It's official ... I have arrived in Amsterdam.

Okay, I guess that should have been my headline a few days ago, but who cares. The point is that I arrived safe and sound, but of course, not without some trademark Andrewisms along the way.

First off, I had a major issue while packing - shocking I know! It's hard packing for three seasons when you're limited to two suitcases. I mean, I can't wear the same thing over and over - and besides, I have new looks I want to debut.

Of course, no matter what I did, I was over the weight allowance, but I hoped that a little charm might help me get over the issue with the agent.

And I wasn't wrong. The desk agent was really nice and she took the time to help me even out the weight since one bag was at 22.9kg and the other at 27.5kg.

After somewhat succeeding in evening out the weight, she let both bags go through without making me pay - plus, she also put through my tennis bag full of even more clothes. And all it took was a compliment about her outfit and work ethic, along with a hilarious story about having to pack three seasons worth of clothes.

I'm telling you, my greatest skill is my ability to talk my way into and out of situations.

Anyways, back into focus, being the ditz that I am, I also forgot my mp3 player in the car. So that meant I had to buy a new one and I managed to get $20 dollar discount - thanks to my world-renowned haggling skills!

Now, onto the flight. Since I got a really good rate, I was taking British Airways. And I thought that BA was supposed to be the cream of the crop when it comes to airlines.

I don't think so!

For starters, the meal selection wasn't good - it was between beef or three-cheese tortellini. Usually, I wouldn't eat either dish, but for some reason, I went for the tortellini.

Honestly, I had one bite and it was horrible - not that I should expect great things with airplane food. But seriously, the salad didn't even look edible and the desert was supposed to be a piece of apple pie ... I think?!

All I ended up having was the dinner roll and the bottle of water. I mean, why get sick on airplane food when I can have a low cal flight? Besides, my meal earlier in the day, along with my coffee, was more than enough.

And so while the meal was horrible, the service was passable, although I personally like people who are friendlier and more outgoing. The two times I've taken Air Canada on transatlantic flights have had friendlier staff - perhaps BA could learn something from AC?

But the real kicker was the choice of movies and television shows. It honestly sucked - everything was so old and outdated, except for Rachel Getting Married and Burn After Reading. I was hoping for something a little more up-to-date ... like perhaps screening all the movies up for Oscars. I guess I'm asking for too much.

But whatever, I took a trip down nostalgia lane and watched one of my favourite movies, Twister. And I found two great shows - on the Australian Open and the other was on gymnastics, so at least I had 4 hours of "entertainment".

Anyways, once I touched down in London, you know exactly what I did - I got a Starbucks venti non-fat extra hot toffee nut latte. Then, like clockwork, I proceeded to WHSmith and got all the 99p trashy Brit tabloids I could.

Oh, and FYI ... rather than calling these magazines an escape mechanism, I now like to think of them as research for my future career on the talk show circuit.

It was my first time in Heathrow terminal 5 and it's pretty nice - it made the layover much more bearable.

And my flight from London to Amsterdam was okay - they served us a small lunch, which I politely declined and watched the man sitting across the aisle from me ask to have my portion.

In all honesty, he definitely could have used a few low cal days himself ...

But whatever, I arrived in Amsterdam, cleared customs with no problems and got my bags. And I somehow managed to make it from the airport to the my studio all while being jet lagged and having to carry two huge suitcases, a tennis bag, a carry-on and a laptop bag.

And yes, I managed to carry all this while still looking great and keeping it fierce as I strutted down the sidewalk.

Anyways, I arrived at my place and it's really nice. I have my own studio and it's small, but it works for me. It came furnished which means I don't have to take anything back home. And it's in a nice area that is really close to the transit lines.

Here are some pictures:

So no complaints here ... it's definitely a complete 180 from my experience in Denmark. And I think I'll like living by myself - it'll give me the chance to do my own thing and get exactly what I need/want from the programme.

And for my first full day in Amsterdam, I walked all around the city with Thomas. We ended up walking for like 6 hours and I've seen a lot of the city.

And yes, I even ventured to the Red Light District because I wanted to do that during the day time. It's not special - in fact, it's pretty bland. I actually think the city should get rid of the area, move it elsewhere, and make a killing off the real estate value of such a sought-after area.

In fact, it's such a great idea that Amsterdam should make me their city planner. I could revamp the city and make it took fierce - and I'd start by harmonizing some of the architectural designs!

Think about it, not only could I be Andrew Hercules, Talk Show Host, but I could also be Andrew Hercules, Executive City Planner.

And frankly, the second title sounds so much more respectable, academic and intelligent, right?

Thought so!

Getting ready for Amsterdam? ... Of course I am! ... [cue eye roll]

2009-01-25T18:35:00.003-05:00

So, it's January 26, 2009 and it's only 6 days until I arrive in Amsterdam. Originally, I was supposed to arrive on Thursday (January 29) but instead, I'll be arriving on Sunday (February 1).

Now don't read too much into the fact that I changed my flight - as some of my dearest friends have already done. I still plan on returning to Amsterdam. But of course, I've grappled with this decision.

In all honesty, since the beginning of January, I've really considered just packing up and heading to LA for a year to try and make it in showbiz. Of course, the rational part of me always maintained I should return to Amsterdam.

It's just that after long conversations with family and some of my best friends, I get the feeling that perhaps the programme isn't right for me at the point I'm at in my career - then again, what career can I really speak of?!

But I also think that I'm just one of those people who has so many interests and potential career paths - and I hate having to choose one. It's honestly very scary when you invest time, energy, and money into one particular career and things don't pan out. Can't I just keep all my options open for the rest of my life?!

Oh well, expect to see me on February 3 ready for some more learning ... and of course, a few "luv ya longtimes"!

Anyways, let me fill you in on how things have been going for me lately.

I (finally) have my own housing confirmed in Amsterdam - and yes, I did it without setting foot in the country. It's a lot nicer than where I was originally supposed to live and I'm excited to live on my own - especially after the disaster that was Norde Ringgade 70.

And for those of you who might come to visit, here's a map that shows where I'm living. And trust me, you'll want to come visit - especially for my 24-hour Oscar Movie Marathon! Although who knows if I'll even watch the telecast this year - I'm really not impressed with the nominees!

*Memo to the Academy ... Stop nominating people just because they passed away and you feel bad! There's tons of talent that gave even better performances!

Anyways, bringing it back into focus ... two weeks ago, I went back to Buffalo - again! Only this time, I found some great stuff - it was like all the stores had everything on sale because they knew I was coming.

I managed to get a few things - sadly, not the dark bootcut denim I desperately needed. But that's okay, I got some great tops (in my favourite neutral ... gray), a great black & white tweed jacket, and awesome shoes!

Most importantly, I didn't have to pay duty when I crossed the border. I guess CBSA feels guilty for always taking my money. I swear in addition to being Canada's #1-ranked professional cross-border shopper, I'm also Canada's #1-ranked victim of border, tax, and duty discrimination.

Obviously the border guards want to say to their grandchildren that years ago, they stopped the Oprah's replacement at the border and made him pay $10.

Well it's either that, or they don't like me because of my colourful and ever-changing ethnic and religious identity!

Anyways, on the work front, my time at home has been really productive.

I've been doing a ton of writing and recently started writing for a new website, Informed Vote. I haven't written anything yet as I'm still feeling out how they assign topics and what their lens/news frame is. But whatever, I'm really excited to be contributing to a website and I'm glad I have the chance to build upon and diversify my portfolio - just in time for all those London internships I want!

And I'm also working on developing content for the website of a new advisory group I'm working with, Research Mob. In fact, last Friday I had a 6 hour, shockingly hi-cal(!), meeting with all the members of the project. Honestly, I really think I missed my life calling - I should soooo be in marketing.

Wait, can you even win an Oscar for marketing? Like Best Actor in a Marketing Campaign?

Ummmm ... I didn't think so - it doesn't have the same ring to it as Best Actor in a Leading Role!

So I guess I'm back to my original goal of being a passable B-list celebrity!

And speaking of the B-list, I've also branched out and started acting!

I know ... it's shocking! But if I want that Oscar I've got to start somewhere - because let's face it, it's not really an award I can sleep my way to!

Actually, I think I'm pretty good at acting - after all, my "I'm so sorry, but ..." routine has gotten me out of tons of problems!

And so I decided to take my 5 minutes of acting experience and audition for some roles. Last Monday, I went to an audition for a commercial and I barely missed the cut - they loved the confidence and maturity of my performance but ...

Get this ... they wanted someone younger! Can you imagine - they wanted someone younger than me?

That's right ... make me feel old - and fat while you're at it! And for all those invited to my 30th Botox Birthday Party, it's now my 25th Botox Birthday Party ... combined with an intervention because you know I'll be having a major quarterlife crisis!

Whatever, I'm now thinking that instead of going to Sydney for the summer - and in the process, taking my dear friend Thomas' spot - I'll go to Singapore and get some cheap plastic surgery!

Anybody care to join? *

*Remember, journalism is a shallow industry and we're all not getting any younger ...! [cue eye roll]

Anyways, that's about it for me - like I said, I'll see everyone in Amsterdam soon.

And don't worry, I promise I'll be there on Tuesday for the start of class!

After all, I have a brand new outfit to debut - and I definitely don't want to miss that!

Okay, I've got a shopping problem ... maybe a few "Hail Visas" will help?!

2009-01-07T23:43:00.000-05:00

So, it's been a while since I've written a posting, but I figured that since I've been home for 2.5 weeks, it's about time I post something new.

But what to talk about?

There's no Mundus drama to report on and it's not like I can complain about anything related to the programme (well actually ...), so instead, let me give you a rundown of what I've been up to.

First of all, I did arrive safely in Toronto. The flight was okay and surprisingly, it wasn't cancelled. And I love Aarhus airport for one thing - it takes like 2 minutes to clear security. Seriously, I was so surprised at how easy it was - I didn't even have to take my shoes off!

And I'm officially a great luggage packer. Seriously, when they weighed my bags, I came in at 22.8kg for each bag - 0.2kg under what I was allowed. Of course, this was after I donated two huge bags full of clothes to the local Salvation Army. But whatever, I was proud of myself and I only had to yell at my bags twice to squish in so I could close the zipper!

Now, about the flights. From Aarhus to Copenhagen, it's such a short flight that I could only play 'Bleeding Love' and half of 'Piece of Me' before I had to turn my mp3 player off. I was able to get through more songs on my flight to London, although I could hear the music of the person sitting next to me. I honestly wanted to lean over and tell him that grunge metal is so early 2000s - we all know 2009 is about whiny emo pop rock and ghetto fab rap and R&B.

Anyways, when I got to London, the first thing I did was buy a Starbucks and visit the book store to pick up some trashy Brit tabloids. You know, because the Brits have the best gossip ever!

Honestly, I think I'll totally fit in if I got a job working at one of the mags. In fact, I'd make a really good 'Agony Aunt' - you know, the people you write to for advice and they offer a witty, charming, and sarcastic response. I mean, c’mon, it's not like it's a stretch from my usual "talk to me, tell me your problems" Dr. Phil-inspired routine.

Anyways, thank goodness my flight from London to Toronto wasn't cancelled. We did have a scare though when we were flying over eastern Canada and the flight attendant said the pilot was thinking of landing in Ottawa or Montreal. I was really bummed out because why would I want to spend a night in Ottawa or Montreal when I could have spent the night shopping in the duty free stores at Heathrow?

And when we landed, I was really happy to get off the plane because the family sitting in front of me were total WHITE TRASH to the max. I mean, the dad had like 4 beers and I swear I heard at least 30y'alls and an in-depth discussion about how to cheat EI while working. They were so trashy, that they couldn't even fill out the customs forms correctly - I had to tell them that 'name' does not mean 'address' and that you don't declare you're bringing a gun into Canada as a joke!

Oh well, you know what I say ... where there's white trash, there's always a landfill!

Anyways, once I landed, got my Tim Horton's coffee and did the obligatory "I'm back and let me give you the 5 minute recap" for friends and family, I spent the next few days shopping for Christmas gifts. Seriously, not even 12 hours after I landed, I was already driving my SUV (with a Tim Horton's in hand) to the local Wal-Mart with my brother for a little shopping.

And, since I hardly did any shopping in Denmark, I really had all this pent up shopping energy to spend - you know, some guys have pent up sexual energy, I have pent up shopping energy!

So, I had my own version of sex - spending money on a shopping spree! And don't worry, it was just a little one!

I mean, at last count, I spent about $2200 CDN (or 1400 Euros) in just over a week.*

* Don't judge me?!

But before you say anything, that figure does include all of my gifts plus my traditional Boxing Day shopping expedition.

Anyways, after spending all that money, I'd say that Christmas was pretty good. Everyone got lots of gifts, thanks to my clever shopping and my ability to take advantage of economic turmoil in the retail sector. And our dinner was good, although you know, I kept it low cal because you've got to watch those holiday cals - they are even worse than regular day-to-day cals!

But seriously, the best part of Christmas isn't the family or the presents ... it's Boxing Day. Now for those of you not lucky enough to have this fabulous holiday, in a nutshell, it's a day of huge sales. I definitely went on a major shopping spree - you know, going four months without the equivalent of a shopping orgasm is tough!

This year, I avoided the clothes. Instead, I decided to buy my parents a new living room set - their former furniture was either broken or just plain tacky! And we got some awesome deals - even though it required us having to cart the stuff back home and you know, I just don't like doing that sort of stuff. That's what credit cards and hired help are for!

My shopping continued on the 27th when I went to Buffalo, NY. Shockingly, I hardly bought anything. The sales just weren't there. Well wait, that's not really a fair statement - there were great sales. It's just that we didn't go to any of the stores I shop at.

Like we went to this ghetto fabulous store (AJ Wright) and listen, I might be 1/2 black, but I'm not ghetto. I was honestly the best dressed person in the store and I couldn't even look at anything on the rack - the smallest size was an XL.

I was so bored; I spent my time making outfits from men's t-shirts, patent leather belts, ghetto bling handbags and stiletto pumps. I made a few really nice outfits and they were definitely better than the hoochie mama tops on the clearance rack!

So yeah, then it was New Years and it was good. I kept it low key this year because honestly, it has to be the most overrated holiday ever - I mean, to spend huge amounts of money to count down from 10 in a room with tons of trashy-dressed people and some crappy balloons, streamers, and confetti, is just plain ridiculous!

Seriously, New Years has become one of those, "ummm, no thanks, I'll just save that money for my wardrobe" kind of holidays!

Speaking of wardrobe, I've been spending a lot of time looking at my current clothes - I felt my look got stale in Denmark. Not the colour palette per se, since gray is my favourite neutral, but more about the fabrics and style. You know, my jeans and full-zip hoodie look is so blah now.

So to force myself to buy new clothes, I did a huge run to the Salvation Army with tons of clothes - enough to easily give someone like 10 good outfits. I like to think of it as a good deed that will help me inch my way closer to heaven - actually, on second thought, hell has got all the cool people, so I'll just go there instead!

Anyways, my project for the next three weeks is to buy some new clothes with spring/summer in mind. Based on what I've read so far, I've got mixed feelings about the upcoming spring/summer collections.

According to Pantone, the self-described global authority on colour, mimosa is the colour for 2009. So that means I'll be introducing some yellow into my wardrobe during my time in Amsterdam. Not that it will look all that good - I've never really liked yellow because I feel like it makes me that much more of a giraffe.

You know, tall, thin, long neck, brown with yellow ... yes, that's a giraffe ... or me when I wear yellow!

I'll also be re-introducing orange after I sort of exiled it from my wardrobe last year. I'm starting to think about what I'll wear to the Queen's Birthday too - just in case girlfriend invites me to her palace for a tea and a gossip session!

So we'll see how my wardrobe renewal goes. I want to keep it fresh, fun and fashionable, but still trendy, yet classic. If anything, I know I'll find some great deals in Amsterdam - you know, since I've already researched about the shopping options in the city! And if that fails, I'm a quick 30 Euro flight away from London and Oxford Street!

Ummm, what else ... I got a housing offer from De Key, but I turned it down. And so, I've been spending more and more time trying to find housing on my own. I don't want to live in the Dutch version of Brabrand and pay a fortune - if I'm going to be living in the ghetto, I want cheap housing subsidized by the government!

So that's pretty much been my life for the last two weeks. Not overly exciting, but whatever, it's good to be home ... and have access to decent coffee!

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and figure out how I'm going to pay my incoming Visa bill ... maybe a few "Hail Visas" will work?!

Everything from academics to fashion to politics ... it's the top 10 things I've learned in Aarhus!

2008-12-18T11:51:00.009-05:00

So being based in Aarhus for about 4 months has definitely been an interesting experience. I mean, it's a nice little 'city' of about 300,000 people - that's like 1/10 of the population of Toronto and god knows what fraction of the population of London or Mumbai!

Anyways, like I said before, I've come up with a list of the top 10 things I've learned in Aarhus. Now, they are not necessarily academic things, because, I found this semester very easy and not at the level I expected. *

* Side note ... if the Masters level is this easy, maybe I can get a legitimate PhD then, instead of buying one in Life Experience & Knowledge from an online degree mill! Just think ... I could really call myself Dr. Andrew!

1) I'm quite academic ... when I want to be!

I actually write a pretty decent paper, provided I have the right motivation. And you know, since I like shopping so much, it's really easy actually. Like for example, in the third module, we got our exam on Tuesday and I was already done by Thursday night - all I had to do was print out the page of a cell phone I wanted on eBay and stick it to my wall.

I promised myself that I could bid on the phone only if I finished the essay. And two days later, I was done ... and guess what, I won the phone! And even though I was done so early, I still handed it in at like 11:59am on Tuesday morning ... after running from the street to hand it in on time!

But I'm not only academic in that way. I've also pioneered two really important words that will really define the English language in 2009.

- comingtogetherness: the act of a group coming together and getting along well; this was inspired by the totally awesome Group A, you know, because we just always rocked!

- antisoccermomism: this is what my girl Hilary (that's Hillary with one "L", Thomas!) suffered from during a shock defeat to Barack Obama; can also be used to define hostility towards soccer moms from hockey moms who feel they are superior because their kids play a sport that involves sticks and skating around on ice!

Just wait, these will be two of the top words of 2009!

2) I'm a great ambassador for Canadian culture ... and Canada can thank me for opening a global alliance.

So a few things here. First of all, during the Trip Around the World party, I exported the North American dessert culture - instead of making something myself, I simply went to the grocery store and bought a cake. You know, because that's how we do it over on this side of the pond!

And I've also watched out for Canada's interest. I decided that NAFTA just isn't quite doing it for us up north. So instead, Canada is now part of CIC + G, a truly global alliance. I know the ladies of CIC + G always look out for me, and I look out for them.

Besides, everyone wants to be in CIC + G now. But you know, we've decided that it can't become something like CIC + G + F + M + N + M + ....! Because, let's face it, I'll never remember all the members of the alliance, just like I can barely remember provincial capitals!

And frankly, it always was and always will be about CIC + G!

3) The Danes are pretty cool ... except for the fashion!

It's been pretty cool living in Denmark for the past four months. In some ways, they are similar to Canada. I am intrigued by how much beer they consume over here - and for the simple fact that I saw a grocery add one time that advertised 33 beers for 50 DKK (about $10 CDN!)

For the most part, the Danes have been pretty awesome. We totally get along and language isn't an issue - you know, because I'm completely fluent in Danish!?

But let's talk fashion for a second.

I really need to emphasize that a skinny, saggy-ass Indigo wash jean tucked into white tube socks with white All Star Converse hi-tops with a puffy, cinched-waist bomber jacket with faux fur is a little too wannabe ghetto fabulous! Everyone's wearing it and I encourage the Danes to introduce some variety to their wardrobe.

4) Liberal internationalism is so 2007.

Let's be honest here ... realism rocks.

I mean, c'mon, every country does its own thing anyways, so trying to work together is pointless. As I say, at the UN, there is no comingtogetherness!

Besides, like I said, I've got CIC + G backing me up and two of the countries in our alliance have nuclear weapons, so Canada has nothing to fear really. If anything happens, I'll just phone up my good friends in China and India and be all like, "Girl, I got my some problemzzz over here. I need you to send me a few nukes so I can show these b*tches down south that I mean business when I say that I'll bust a cap!"

5) So you're saying that ALL cultures are like hybrids!

OMG! Say it isn't so!

This is shocking ... like when Bennifer broke up or Britney went crazy!

Seriously, taking an entire module where we learned this was pointless in my mind. I mean, look at Toronto and you can just see the hybridity*.

*By the way, I hate the word hybridity now!

I will definitely never read Kraidy's book again, because, frankly, his argument is useless to me. I think I need to introduce to him the concept of post-hybridity because Toronto is a great example of cultures that have thrived on adapting and introducing elements of other cultures.

You want proof - visit one of those $8 all-you-can-eat Chinese buffets that offer 'American' french (I mean freedom!) fries. Or a jerk chicken place that sells Cantonese chow mein. And you can't forget about the one religious building that literally changes its religious affiliation weekly (one week, its Hindu, the next its Jewish, the next its Catholic, etc.)!

See, it's true! Toronto is totally post-hybrid and so the third module pretty much can be summed up as "Hybridity, huh!"

Seriously, I totally want that one month of my life back now!

6) Roommates can be a blessing ... but most often, they are a curse!

You know, it was definitely an experience living in good ol' Norde Ringgade 70. It was close to a lot of things and I miss that - the tennis courts I used to sneak into, the Rema 1000 I used to shop at on Sunday because it was the only thing open, and so on.

Yet, I definitely won't miss most of my housemates. I mean, they were just horrible people - you know, the kind I would have trashed in high school and probably started a rumour about them!

I mean, who plays music loudly at 3:30am! Or has a meal at 4:30am! Do they not know that dancing after 2:00am and food after 3:00am means you pack on the cals ?!

They totally seemed to miss that last part!

But at least I did have a good ally in the house, Maike, and you know we were always talking about the 'downstairs' clique. It was truly bitchy and I told her that our house in just like the whole Mean Girls movie ... only this time, I won't get hit by a bus, the Plastics will live on, and I'll get my way with everything!

But honestly, with the experience I've had here, I know I'll be able to fall asleep so much easier at home!

7) Even with my skin tone, I still crave sunlight for a natural glow!

Being in Denmark, I was definitely exposed to a lot of cloudy and rainy days.

I've definitely experienced a massive vitamin D deficiency. I needed some vitamin D stat!

I seriously thought about getting a fake tan, but you know, those just look so ... unreal. So I opted to go for the pasty, half n half tone look that I've done for the past decade. It's worked and why change something if it's not broken!

On the plus side, the sky is my favourite fashion neutral - gray. I think it really inspired me this fall to transition from brown to gray as my core neutral in my wardrobe.

8) I'm going to Promises Rehab Centre in Malibu for a hard-core caffeine and shopping addiction.

Seriously, I missed decent coffee while I was in Aarhus. Not that the coffee was bad, it was just soooooo expensive.

And shopping, I could barely buy anything. I started going through such bad withdrawal that I began buying random stuff on eBay just so I could spend money. And let's not even start talking about all the crap I bought at Rema 1000 on Sunday ...

It has been so long since I went shopping that when I went for coffee a few days before I left, I was taken aback when I had to sign the credit card bill. It almost felt foreign - I guess I've just not been shopping enough.

Thank goodness for Buffalo though - I'll be making a few trips there before I leave for Amsterdam. You know, because I'm already planning my summer 2009 wardrobe!

9) I love socialism and rules ... but there's a limit!

It's been really interesting living in a country with a better social welfare system than Canada's - not that it's hard because over here, ours really sucks in so many ways!

I mean, I did like how I had healthcare coverage right away and a doctor I could go to when I was sick ... or just wanted to talk to someone who would prescribe me hardcore narcotics just so I'd leave him alone!

But there's definitely a limit. I mean, I love socialism and I love rules, but you know, only so much.

Like when we went to the Aarhus Film Festival. The entire theatre was open but people happened to have seats in the row I was sitting in. They seriously made people get up out of their seats just so they could sit in where they were "assigned". I was like, "OMG! Who does that?" I mean, the seats they had been assigned weren't even that good anyways.

But my favourite are those who will wait to walk across an intersection at 3:00am, even if there are no cars. People will actually wait until the light turns green. I was shocked, because it's all about jaywalking in Toronto!

So all this has lead me to my innovative socialism theory.

You have countries in Scandinavia and the former USSR (pre 1989) that are drowning in socialism, rules, and a collective mindset. Then you've got France, Germany and maybe China frolicking in the deep end of socialism. Canada and the UK are in the shallow end with crappy social programmes that citizens cling to for dear life. And of course, the good ol' US is off tanning on the deck - you know, because socialism is just so un-American.

Now don't worry, the US will be joining us in the pool once they pass an auto bailout package! If not, at least they'll have a great tan ... and an economy worth sh*t!

10) After careful consideration, I've decided that ... you will see me in Amsterdam!

As we all know, I've struggled with elements of this programme. But given the current media climate in Canada, and the people I've met here, I'll stick it out and return to Amsterdam.

Plus, in some weird way, I'm actually excited about Amsterdam. I've been doing a lot of research and I've found out some great things I can do. Like this acting class I'm taking – you know, because I'm serious about winning an Oscar.

And don't worry, I won't get lost in the Red Light District ... although I might visit some of the ladies and talk tips on how to maximize client revenues! Maybe we'll even have a few dance classes for the girls just starting out at the strip bars too!

And so there you have it, the top 10 things I've learned in Aarhus ... that don't necessarily involve a classroom. Like I said, I enjoyed living in Aarhus, but I'm definitely glad to be back.

Now if you don't mind, there's a double-double from Tim Horton's and a chocolate donut calling my name!

Happy Holidays!

And the countdown is on ... 6 days to go and counting!

2008-12-13T13:01:00.002-05:00

That's right ... less than a week until I'm home!

Only 6 days until I spend about 18 hours in airplanes and airports trying to get back home. Although who am I to complain - I do love flying ... it's just so executive, especially walking down a jet-way!*

* Not walking on the tarmac though - that's so not executive!

Anyways, like last week, this week has been pretty boring. It's our exam week, so that means everyone is holed up in their room's writing away.

On the plus side, it's also Aarhus University's exam week, which has meant that my house has been eerily quiet - not that I'm complaining. But I'm so used to having such loud and obnoxious roommates, that it's weird not having to yell at them to keep it down at 3am in the morning!

Whatever, I've only got to see them for a few more days, and no, I won't be shedding any tears for them ... not even my trademark single tear!

Honestly, the highlight of my week was on Monday*, when we had an extra lecture that started at 9:15am ... I know, 9:15am!

* I know, I have no life!

Not that what the lecture was on was interesting - it was on our course and it should have been our first lecture, not our second last one! But we had the chance to talk to Prof. Wendy Bacon from the University of Technology Sydney, which happens to be one of the partner universities in our programme.

Last year, they started a formal exchange programme, which unfortunately is only open to EU students. And you know, my sham marriage to Nora fell through because I didn't want to lose my other funding - you know, because I love free EU money!

Anyways, I had the chance to talk to Wendy about possibly applying for a spot in the programme, but separate from the EU students. I told her I'm willing to pay tuition and living expenses personally - well, of course, I'd rather find someone to pay for me!

You know how it is!*

* Hello to my former 'clients' from Norde Ringgade - time to pay up!

So we'll see how it goes - hopefully she gets back to me soon with a positive response. But if not, I'll fall back on Plan B (no, not the contraceptive - I'm not pregnant!) and look for an internship in London.

Then again, I'm sure I can get in if I do what any honourable North American would do when faced with an institution that won't admit them ...

Ask them what their price is ... money definitely talks!

And if that doesn't work, I'll play the race card and say that I should be admitted based on existing employment equity and affirmative action initiatives!

But don't worry, I don't think I'll have to go that far ... Australia and Canada have always been BFFs on the world stage - although that's changed under my watch, you know, since I've joined CIC + G!

Anyways, that was the Monday class and on Tuesday, we got our exam questions, which shockingly, I thought were fair and quite easy actually. Although I'm seriously sick and tired of talking about public service broadcasting! I suddenly feel the urge to write a paper defending large commercial, for-profit media conglomerates!

And a side note to all those who think I'm a total flake, I managed to score a 10.0 in our first module - out of the 12.0 scale here in Denmark. Honestly, I was surprised - now I want a 12.0 just because it's higher, but nobody will donate 2.0 of their grade points to my cause!*

* Single tear *

Oh well, we'll just have to up the charm and fashion sense when I'm handing in this paper! You know, because it's like my academic tradition ... a little charm + a great outfit = a surefire 'A', if not an 'A+'! And folks, I've got the transcripts to back up that theory!

Anyways, other than that, the week has been pretty boring. I've just been writing - my essay, tv show ideas, my book ... seems like I can't stop now!

But I have started to pack because I figure I need to get a head start - otherwise Thursday night will roll by and I'll be left in full panic mode. And you know that even with this pre-packing, 10:30pm Thursday night will come and I'll be in my room, sitting on my luggage and yelling at my clothes to squish together so I can zip up the bag!

Oh, I almost forgot - today (Saturday), I ventured downtown for probably the last time. It was somewhat bittersweet - I've kind of gotten used to Aarhus and it's smallness. I'm really used to being able to walk downtown in 20 minutes, which is something I don't think I'll get in Amsterdam.

Anyways, after the nostalgic feelings wore off, I checked out the shopping because I wanted to see if the malls and stores are as busy as they would be back home. Seriously, the Danes didn't disappoint!

It was madness, especially in the toy store. It was like wall-to-wall people - yelling parents, crying kids, exasperated grandparents ... weirdly enough, it felt like home!

And you know that once I heard Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas Is You", it was like being back in Scarborough Town Centre at 5:30pm on the Saturday before Christmas. It was great - and I was tempted to get in on the fun, but you know, Air Canada's baggage requirements can be so strict, so I had to stop myself!

Anyways, that's been about it - a pretty boring week. But like I said, only 6 days to go until I'm home.

And for those of you shopping for a gift for me (either for Christmas or a back-dated gift from one of the previous religious holidays I celebrate, like Diwali or Eid), check out this blog posting - if I get anything on this list, you're seriously off my friend list.

That's right - both my real-life AND my Facebook friends list!

And don't even think about asking for a shout out during my Oscar speech ... it won't happen. And you can forget my Grammy, Golden Globe, Emmy, and Tony speeches as well!

Oh, but do remember that cash is always accepted – Euros or Pounds only please, because the US dollar is tanking!

And you can never go wrong with a preloaded credit card - preferably MasterCard because I've got enough Visa cards in my wallet already competing for my attention/usage!

Luv y'all longtime ... and I look forward to your gifts! :P jks

P.S. - I'll be uploading this week (probably on Thursday or early Friday morning) the top 10 things I've learned in Aarhus*

* Yes, I did actually learn something! Shocking isn't it?!

Even on the ice with dull skates, I've still got style, grace, and elegance!

2008-12-06T11:25:00.001-05:00

Another week gone ... and this time it was incredibly boring!

With no TA sessions and class only on Tuesday and Friday, it was a pretty uneventful week.

Nothing overly exciting happened and there's no Mundus drama to report – at least nothing that can be verified with statements from sources! *

* See, I am trying to be a better journalist - it's just that, you know, I'm supposed to be the on-air talent!

I swear, the most interesting thing this week was that the International Secretariat farewell party was in fact not a party – they said to be there at 8pm for dinner, drinks, and dessert.

So of course, I went, not because I wanted food, but you know, so I could give my plate of food to a someone else and enjoy a nice glass of water!

Apparently they started the dinner at 6pm and so when we got there, everything was gone and they were clearing plates. A few of Mundusians definitely weren't happy.

So instead, Thomas, Carina and I ventured to this really sketchy restaurant near the harbour. They both had hot dogs and I got fries - and yes, I did eat some of them! And come to think of it, I think Thomas had it right when he said I was probably the first 'non-white' person to eat there.

But whatever, I love bringing a little diversity into people's lives - I mean it's not everyday you run into someone: who believes they are 1/6 black, 1/6 white, 1/6 Native Canadian, 1/6 Chinese, 1/6 Indian, 1/6 Qatari; and who celebrates all religious, gift-receiving holidays!

And so, instead of bitching about how boring the week was or my usual laundry list of problems I have with the programme ...

I'll bring it into focus and talk all about ... ME!

Since I had a lot of free time this week, I managed to get a few personal projects completed.

Like I sent off to W Network a proposal for a new show. It's definitely similar to the organizational/makeover shows currently airing on W Network. I had already sent them another proposal back in July and they liked it, but they already had a full schedule - I did manage to get at least get a phone call from the programming coordinator, which I thought was a nice (and often forgotten) gesture!

So I'm hoping for the best this time - although don't worry, I highly doubt I'll be leaving this programme. The Canadian and American economy sucks right now and I'd rather not take my chances in trying to score a job - layoffs at CTV and Canwest combined with cutbacks at CBC don't spell success for someone like me! And like I've said, at least this programme keeps me occupied for the next year and a half.

But if anything, trying to pitch show ideas is only helping me refine my craft for my big day – the one pitch that really matters ... that's right, I'm talking about the day I pitch my talkshow to the executives of ABC, NBC, and CBS and start a bidding war! *

*Okay, maybe that's the reality that plays out in my head, but as we all know, I'm dead serious about having my own show!

As well, I also finished my first film treatment. Now all I need to do is find a bootleg copy of Final Draft Pro to write the screenplay and I'll be set.

I'd tell you about it, but I'm pretty sure that most people will know what it's about ... gymnastics!

And don't worry, I don't think this film will win me my much-coveted Oscar. I still can't decide what I want my Oscar for – directing, acting, or for best film?

Besides the proposal and treatment, I also had the chance to follow the political drama in Ottawa. Who knew Canadian politics could be so interesting?

I mean, we were sooooooooooo close to defeating Harper ... so close!

And when I heard that Michaelle Jean was proroguing Parliament, I literally yelled at my computer screen - I mean, how could she do that?

Oh well, for my views on the whole affair, plus why Michaelle Jean no longer has “girlfriend” status and doesn't get anymore “love ya longtimes”, check out my A Dose of Andrew segment on it.

Anyways, the highlight of my week was on Friday - I went ice skating for the first time in a few years ... okay, I lied - it's probably been a decade since I've skated!

At first, I was a little worried, you know, because I didn't want to fall, because that would be plain old embarrassing. I mean, I have really good balance (you know, from my days as King of the Balance Beam!) but I'm definitely not into the ice sports - I leave that to my younger brothers at home!

Even though the skates were soooo blah (a horrible shade of blue, plus they were as dull as a plastic knife from McDonalds), I did have fun!

And I learned that I still have a few moves - you know, the forward cross-cuts and the backwards cross-cuts leading into a single loop or axel jump. As for the spins, we still have to work on that ... majorly!

I swear, if there weren't so many kids - and parents taking advantage of a free Friday night daycare service - I would have been able to do so much more. I seriously wanted to trip a few of the young hotshots who weaved in and out of people skating around. You know, just stick our foot out, watch them fall, and be all, "Ooops, I am just soooooo sorry" - you know, my usual apology routine!

Anyways, that was my third-last week in Aarhus - pretty boring, but I managed to complete a few personal projects, plus I had the chance to show some of the Danes how we keep it stylish, graceful and elegant on the ice!

And so on that note, I'll tell you to stay tuned for my final two blogs from Aarhus – the next one will be my final recap and the my last one will be a list of the top 10 things I've learned while living in Denmark!

So stay tuned ... or else you won't get a shout out during my Oscar acceptance speech!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas! *

2008-11-29T12:33:00.001-05:00

* Don't worry, I'll refrain from singing Christmas carols off-key!

But in Aarhus, Christmas spirit has really taken over. Not only is there the famous Christmas beer on sale, but they've finally decorated most of downtown with lights. And tomorrow they are lighting the large Christmas tree sitting outside of the Town Hall!

Anyways, last week (November 17 - 21) was really boring - I only had class twice and no TA sessions so the week really dragged on. But there were two highlights:

First, on Friday, I saw Burn After Reading. Now usually I'm not a fan of the Coen brothers - as we all know, I'm still smarting over their Oscar wins last year! But the acting from George, Brad, John, Tilda and Frances was great - in fact, I think John Malkovich at least deserves an Oscar nod for his role as a foul-mouthed ex-government employee.

The second highlight was watching The Devil Wears Prada at "Le home de Montana". Since this is like the 20th time I've seen the movie, I can recite most of the lines by heart. And now Tony knows one of the movies where I draw personal inspiration from - although I don't think I'll ever be as mean as Miranda! Wait ... scratch that ... let's make that a 'maybe'!

This week has been much more interesting. Because of the way class is structured, we had two TA sessions plus two lectures. So that meant class 4 times a week - I haven't done that since my first year at York!

Anyways, as we all know, I'm not the biggest fan of this module. It's seems so separated from the other two, and the organization is outright horrible.

Plus, I'm getting sick and tired of readings and comments in class that tend to take the "well everything is like this and is the same" standpoint. One thing I've always tried to do is refrain from using words like 'all' or 'everyone' - the world is not homogeneous!

And since I think I'm pretty progressive, I find a number of our texts (and by extension, some academics) to be too historical and backwards-looking in their interpretations.

For example, take a discussion I had about public spheres. I argued that just because people (mostly new generations) do not take part in traditional public spheres doesn't mean they aren't participating. I would argue that the nature of these 'spaces' is changing and diffusing outwards from the more traditional centralist manifestations that were seen during the halcyon days of public spheres and discourse in the 1960s and 1970s: *

* I know, who knew I could be so academic in my blog!?

Plus, I've also found myself consciously (and subconsciously) defending the United States and it's cultural exports from the onslaught of the simplistic "cultural imperialism = US media exports" argument. It seems to be the fall-back argument that's the easiest to make and I think that you can't just blame the Americans - they aren't the only ones exporting their stuff! And c'mon, if anybody knows American cultural products, it's Canada ... we sit right next door and get 99% of their stuff at the same time!

Oh well, at least class is almost over - only 3 more to go!

So what else ... ?

Well on Tuesday night, we headed to the Student House to celebrate the birthday of one of the CIC + G ladies, Angie. It was fun ... but what was even more fun was the party she had on Wednesday.

She really went all out - everything was great and she was so organized (totally playing up the stereotype hun! :P)! And I'm so jealous of her collegiate because it's brand new - floors, appliances, furniture. Not like my run-down, built in the 50's shack that I call a home ... for only 20 more days!

On Thursday night, Casa Montana, under the direction of Thomas (aka “Reverse Bounty Bar”) celebrated Thanksgiving Dinner! Everything was really well done - but I'd have to say that the best part was the 10 minute conversation on tabloid talk shows, like Jenny Jones, Ricki Lake, Sally, Maury, Montell ... you know, because that's just my thing!

Although it did feel weird to celebrate Thanksgiving in November - I'm so used to celebrating it in October. Then again, it only reminded me of what I'm missing back home ...

You know, because the American Thanksgiving only means one thing ... Black Friday shopping!

Honestly, my body is so wired for Black Friday shopping - during the entire class on Friday, all I could think about was what I would've purchased and how I would've passed the time while standing in a line at Target for 45 minutes!

Seriously, it is so bad that at 12:30pm our time (or 6:30am in Toronto), I felt my arm muscles twitch, as if I should have been swiping my credit card at Target or Wal-Mart.*

* Maybe I could visit rehab for my shopping addiction ... hmmmm?

Oh well ... at least I could go shopping Friday night. And I was shocked to learn (well back in October that is!), that there is one night where the stores are open until midnight!

That's right ... midnight!

It was like Midnite Madness all over again. It reminded me of when Scarborough Town Centre had Midnite Madness - it was always a crazy night, filled with moms and dads trying to shop and tacky, wannabe teens looking for a warm place to hang out!

Oh the memories ... good times ... good times!

But before I could shop, I wanted to see Aarhus' Christmas Parade. I know it's corny, but I wanted to see how similar/different it is from the one in Toronto - plus, I'm still looking for that elusive half black, half white Santa Claus!

Personally, I thought the parade would have been longer - and I 'm not quite sure why Santa was first. I'm so used to seeing him last - you know those sketchy parade coordinators want you to stick around and watch all the cars with ads plastered on them drive by before seeing Santa. And I was waiting for the candy canes, but they were nowhere to be found!

But the best part of Friday, of course, was the midnight shopping. And in typical "Andrew's in Denmark" fashion, I didn't buy anything. It's just way too expensive here - and that's even when you factor in the 25% tax rate.

And seriously, it's so bad when stores have price tags that list the prices for other countries. Like at Jack Jones, they have tags that show the prices in Denmark, the EU, Finland ... and Canada. And the price in Canadian dollars doesn't match up to the price in Danish Crowns, even with the tax factored in - I smell a rip-off!

So once again, it was another night spent window-shopping. Mostly, my lack of spending can be attributed to my issues with the price, but then I remembered that I have to cart everything back to Toronto in three weeks. And I know I'll struggle to pack already, so I figure why make it harder on myself!

On the plus side, Tony, Thomas and Nora did get a chance to see how I shop - although they didn't get the full experience. You know, the one where I'm walking around the store finding the good deals while you wait in the change room and I yell at you to try something on, even if you hate it!

(paging Rennae, who has had this experience a number of times :P)

At least I could share in the deals that Tony and Thomas scored - for Tony, it was a fitted black military-style wool jacket, while Thomas, shockingly ditched the black jacket in favour of an army green, faux fur trimmed jacket!

Anyways, like I said, I'm home in 20 days, which is good.

So while I can't wait to see everyone at home, I know that my first order of business will be do all the Christmas shopping for my parents.

And that means that on Saturday, you'll likely find me, suffering from extreme jet lag, standing in line at Wal-Mart drinking my third coffee ... of the morning!

My first film festival ... and I think I'm "movied out" for 2008!

2008-11-17T14:00:00.012-05:00

It's now 32 days and counting ... until I'm out of here!

I've officially had it with living in Aarhus - from my housemates to the weather to the shopping, nothing really sits well with me.

But oh well, at least I'll be home soon, although that means I'll only have a week to do all the Christmas shopping for my family. It's a challenge, but I think I'm more than up for it - after all, I wrote the book on professional shopping!

Anyways, our third module, on the intersection between media, culture, and globalization hasn't started out all that well. I thought it would've been much better - and frankly, the module is coming across as completely pointless.

And rumour has it that our professor is a film studies scholar, and unfortunately, I don't think he'll bring anything relevant to class discussions, as film is a completely different type of media, as compared to print or television.

And besides, I'm still really irked that he said he was interested in Britney Studies. I really felt like explaining to him that I practically invented that field as I've always connected entertainment news to academic concepts ... hmmm ... I smell plagarism!

Unfortunately, I'm not really happy with this course and I was really counting on this module to make up for my disappointment - looks like it won't be happening anytime soon. And I won't belabour the point that I'm trying really hard to see the value in this programme - I honestly think I might be better off going back to Canada and finding a job out west.

You know, since I've really gotten into screenwriting and I think that's a more appropriate path for me - and for those of you that know, yes, I am kicking myself for giving up an excellent opportunity in Toronto to take a place in this programme ... unfortunately, it's not one of those opportunities that will magically appear again!

Anyways, since talking about class is enough to make me want to drop out, I'll talk about something else ... and shockingly, it's not celebrities ... but it's something close ...

Film Festivals!

Well more precisely, the Aarhus Film Festival.

And let me just say, I was pleasantly surprised by the offerings - I thought they might have been in Danish, but all of the movies, except for Waltz With Bashir, were in English or at least had English subtitles.

The festival started on Thursday and since I want to break into film (and win an Oscar for something ... anything really), I figured I should start attending film festivals and network.

I was really tempted to try and crash the opening event, but I decided against it - if it was the Toronto or LA festival, it would be a different story and I'm sure my antics would have made the cover of newspapers all over!

Plus, I also had another birthday party to attend - and side note, I realize that for some reason, anytime I'm at a party, I'm always in the kitchen.

I'm not sure why, but I think it has to do with my weird relationship with food - and besides, it's always the best place to hear the latest gossip and engage in my new activity, fake smoking! It's like smoking, only there's no cigarette so it's 100% cancer free - the benefit is that you can still do the whole "I'm ultra cool" ash-out ritual anywhere!

Anyways, the film festival was pretty good. I ended up seeing 8 different movies - most were good and I really only had a problem with two of the films.

I saw so many movies that I think I'm "movied" out for the rest of the year - plus, I've got the always important Oscar season coming up and I've got to save my movie-watching energy for my "watch all the nominated films" marathon (location, time and date TBA)

So here's a breakdown of what I saw.

** Friday **

- Dealing & Wheeling in Small Arms: A really interesting view into the arms trade with particular focus on how weapons from states in the Balkan region have found their way into conflict zones in Africa. I'm astonished at the gun culture mentality of not only the creators of these weapons, but those who trade them, those who collect them, and those that use them.

- Recipes for Disaster: A hilarious documentary that follows a Finnish family of four that decided to embark on an oil-free diet for a year. From the teary, goodbye car scene, to the smart aleck son who lets his dad know that the camcorder is made of plastic, it's a great movie that really shows how reliant we are on oil, not only to fuel our cars, but also to package so many of the items we find essential to our lives.

** Saturday **

- The Greatest Silence: Rape in the Congo: Without a doubt, the most heart-wrenching and disturbing movie I saw. I was absolutely stunned at the horror of what women in the Congo face, but equally enraged at the men who boasted about the rapes. I had the chance to speak with the director, Lisa Jackson, after the film, and I told her that I thought she did an extremely admirable job.

- It Happened Just Before: This was the one movie I wasn't crazy about. This documentary tells the personal stories of migrant sex workers through those who would interact/see them (e.g. border officer, brothel owner, consulate worker, etc.). I thought the narrative structure was interesting, but I found it dragged too much - it might have been better if it was about 40 minutes.

** Sunday **

- Letter to Anna: An excellent documentary into the life of Anna Polikovskaya, a Russian journalist who was murdered for being critical of both the Russian and Chechen governments. It was a great insight into the sacrifices that some journalists make in the name of the truth.

- It's Hard Being Loved by Jerks: Of course, I couldn't attend a film festival as a Canadian without seeing at least one movie in French. This one dealt with the controversy surrounding a French magazine's decision to reprint the Danish cartoons of the Prophet Mohammed. Despite the posturing and self-aggrandizing demeanour of the owners and employees of Charlie Hebdo, I thought the movie really pointed to an important debate that must occur within Islamic diasporas.

- The Dictator Hunter: This documentary disappointed me slightly. It followed Reed Brody, a human rights lawyer attempting to bring Hissène Habré, the former dictator of Chad, to justice. I would have preferred if the movie focused more on the geopolitical aspects of the case, in particular on how the African Union, with it's storied history of supporting and legitimizing dictators (paging Robert Mugabe), arrived at a consensus to try Habré in Senegal.

- Up the Yangtze: Another excellent (and Canadian-made) movie about the intersection between modernity and poverty in China. I was really saddened to hear that the daughter's parents could not afford high school education and quite frankly, spoke to and treated her harshly. I was really impressed by not only the scenery, but also the divergent paths that people walk down in modernizing societies.

So that was pretty much how I spent the weekend - in and out of movie theaters in Aarhus. If anything, it was a welcome change from watching movies on my computer.

And since I'm no longer a film festival virgin, you know I'll be going to many more during my time in Europe - I swear film festivals are like Lay's potato chips ... you can't have just one!

And yes, I'm pretty sure you might be hearing of a crazed Canadian trying desperately to sneak into a screening of Angelina's latest movie at Cannes ... hopefully my fashion sense and charm will prevent them from calling the cops!

If not, please contact the Canadian Embassy and let them know I'm not that crazy ... wait, maybe I am!

Oh well, a jail stint never hurt anybody in Hollywood ... right?!

Exams, elections, and excitement over Starbucks! ... I know, I have no life!

2008-11-11T17:15:00.002-05:00

I've never really realized how much I hate essay exams that are 100% of the final grade.

Seriously, doing multiple smaller assignments throughout the year is totally where it's at – obviously, that memo failed to make it to Aarhus University since last week was our exam week.

And of course, in keeping with the theme of the course, the question was horrible and the reading that accompanied it even more so! In fact, I'm sure it only confused people instead of helping them.

Plus, it seemed like all of last week was a complete blur of gray. Literally, it was cloudy, gray, and damp every day! It was like the sun gods didn't want me to get my daily dose of Vitamin D!

Like on Monday, I could barely motivate myself to do any work. It was just too gray and too depressing – so instead, I bought myself a magazine and cut out the pictures and stuck them to my wall. It's amazing how much better a white wall looks with a few pictures of A-list Hollywood celebrities!

Anyways, Tuesday night was also election night in the US! And we all know that I'm still smarting over the failed Hillary '08 campaign.

She was totally the victim of anti-soccermomism, which, as I define in my forthcoming book, Confessions of an Undercover Soccer Mom, is the media's inherent editorial policy that prevents journalists from publishing content that paints soccer-mom approved presidential candidates in a positive light!

Anyways, Kim had an election night party, which rocked. Of course, I was in the corner waving my Hillary '08 flag and lamenting that it could've been her against McCain.

And side-note ... I just love how CNN was calling states even with 0% reporting – ummm, I don't claim to be a math whiz (anymore!) and even I know that's wrong! But at least they called the right stuff, unlike the AP who called the Minnesota Senate race in favour of Al Franken – now the state is in full-recount mode!

And like I've said from the beginning, I've never been a really big fan of Obama's change message and the way he is represented in media coverage – for my take on that issue, click here. Besides, I'm not sure how much of the Washington mentality he can really change.

Again, another side note ... Is it just me, or was Obama's demeanour in the final days of the campaign “heavy”? And no, I'm not referring to the caked on makeup on Michelle. But I noticed that he had that, “What the heck have I gotten myself into?” kind-of look. I think he knows that he's got a lot to prove and that his first administration will be the most scrutinized yet.

But, whatever, congratulations to Mr. Obama and the US.

And memo to Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson. You can go back to your respective groups and resign because neither of you will be America's first non-white president. Personally, I'd elect a black lesbian to lead since that's really the only group that hasn't had a shot at the White House yet!

Anyways, I finally finished my exam on Wednesday and spent much of Thursday trying desperately to edit it so that it was under 4,000 words.

I was so desperate, I ended up going to the library where I know I can't get on the internet to do some major cutting ... of both words and cals! Surprisingly, every time I tried to edit, my word count went up – I think I hit a high of about 4,900 words before managing to finally hit 4,000 words.

So if anyone is doing an essay on terrorism and its impact on the state, e-mail me and I can send you three pages of arguments and paragraphs that I couldn't use! And of course, you don't have to cite me, you know, since I'm not a published academic ... yet!

Anyways, on Friday night, at like 5pm, Kim, Christina and I decided that we were going to travel to Hamburg on Saturday. We were all desperate to leave Aarhus and its weather for a few days. Copenhagen was out of the question because it's expensive and frankly, I needed better shopping!

We booked our tickets, which only cost like 440 DKK, and of course, we had to select the route that involved a train that left Aarhus at 8:30am. Being that I'm not really a morning person, I wasn't looking forward to it. But surprisingly, I was at the station by 7:50am and was really proud of myself!

With a magazine and coffee in hand, the train ride to Hamburg was pretty relaxed – the trains were mostly empty and I got the chance to catch up on some much-needed entertainment news. And my new favourite Brangelina wannabes are Jordan and Peter ... plus, I'm totally on “Team Kerry Get Better!”

We finally arrived in Hamburg at like 2:30pm and I loved the train station – it was like a huge mall. It reminded me of Victoria station in that there were tons of stores. I figured that if I hated the shopping in the city, I could definitely find something here.

So, since we left last minute, we didn't book any accommodation. And I was not about to do the whole “couch surfing” thing – I'm just not that adventurous!

The first hostel we tried had no rooms left and was full of teenage kids running around and being loud. And I loved this one group of girls who weren't from India but decided they'd try and wear a sari – in keeping with my CIC + G alliance, I was like, “This doesn't work for you girls!” Unfortunately, I didn't have enough time to show them how to properly wear one, but they can be on the lookout for my new spring/summer 2009 “Saris for Men by Andrew” collection.

We finally found a hotel further down the street. And although it was more expensive, it was really worth it. We had a room with three beds and our own washroom and the entire place was really quiet.

Surprisingly, the room was actually well decorated and I loved their use of household items in innovative ways – plungers bolted to the wall like hangers and mousetraps that doubled as magazine holders! Gotta love German engineering and efficiency!

Anyways, we spent Saturday night shopping since they have stores that are open until 8pm, unlike the 4pm closing time in Aarhus.

On a personal note, I'm in love with this new store called C & A. It's like the German version of H&M only cheaper – along with a huge clearance section in the men's department.

We also found this great mall, Europa Passage, and when we were walking through it, out of the corner of my eye, I saw the Starbucks logo. At first I thought I was hallucinating – you know, because I've been sans decent coffee for so long.

Turns out I wasn't dreaming – it was real!

And you know when you want something so badly that time slows down – that's what it was like when I saw the Starbucks. I literally ran down the escalator and towards the store. It was a total slow-mo beach run Baywatch moment.

I was only worried that I'd run into a window or something, but whatever, I've got style and grace so even I did something as ditzy as that, I know I'd still look good!

Besides, a venti toffee nut latte is totally worth any amount of embarrassment. And seriously, I don't think I ever enjoyed a latte as much as I did on Saturday. It totally energized me to go out and seek more bargains!

All in all, our Saturday shopping excursion did snag me some bargains. And unlike the stores in Denmark, German stores know and understand what the word sale really means – at least 60% off. And folks, that's why its now CIC + G and not CIC + D!

I picked up some great tees for 3 Euros, new winter boots for 3 Euros, along with this great 80s inspired bag that Kim initially found revolting, but she secretly likes it now – although she'll probably deny it!

Anyways, dinner on Saturday was at this Thai restaurant and of course, there was drama. Kim ordered a dish that said baked vegetables and when she got her plate, the veggies were fried. We told the waiter that's not what she ordered, and to make a long story short, Kim didn't get a replacement meal. They originally wanted her to pay for the wrong meal, but they said they'd make a “special exception”.

That was really the only truly wacky thing that happened. And hearing a conversation that switched between English and German was tough – I totally lost track of the conversation, which is why I just sat there and made sure I looked great because, you know, that's what I'm good at!

Surprisingly, we did also do some cultural things in Hamburg. Like on Sunday, we visited Spicy's Spice Museum.

We really went there because I read they had a chocolate exhibit. Someone must have forgotten the memo that I sent about exhibits – in order for something to qualify as an exhibit, there needs to be more than one table and a few displays. And more samples wouldn't hurt!

We also took a stroll through the St. Pauli district and the infamous red light district on Reeperbahn. It was totally trashy, and I loved seeing the families with little kids strolling through the streets at sunset. It was a little weird – you know, like the father is introducing his son to a nude bar! It was a little too [insert personal adjective of choice] for me!

The most interesting part of the district was the sex store that was right beside the McDonalds. It was like family values right beside overt sexuality. And then a few stores down, another sex store was showing this S&M bondage flick in the window.

Of course all this time I'm thinking ... where is Focus on the Family when you need them!?

Monday was pretty much another shopping day. We hit up a German supermarket and I finally got some decent coffee and low-fat candies.

Of course, I couldn't leave Hamburg without two things.

First, I needed one more run-through at my favourite, C & A, since I'm a firm believe that stores change their sale racks daily. And of course, C & A didn't disappoint – there was new stuff and clothes were actually in my size!

And in the category of “Most Random Moment”, I'd have to say that my run-in with a German lady in the store takes the cake. She came up to me and asked me if this men's shirt with metal clasps on the back could be washed. I explained to her how to wash it and she thanked me and walked away. But then she came back two minutes later and asked me for some fashion advice.

And you know, I couldn't just say no. I mean, I'm part of CIC + G so I did the honourable thing and helped her put together a few outfits. Even when I'm on a different continent, I still have people come up and ask me for advice – obviously, I must give off a fashion-savvy vibe!

Secondly, I also couldn't leave without another Starbucks! Again, totally worth the money and I snagged a java-jacket that I've put up on my wall to remind me of what decent coffee tastes like!

The train ride back to Aarhus was alright – it wasn't as nice as the ride to Hamburg. Mostly it was because this group of students was in the same car as us and they were loud and obnoxious. Plus in the one train, we had reservations, but people were sitting in our seats. Thank goodness I didn't have to go all, “Hold my sh*t Christina” on them!

All in all, this week was pretty good. We finished the module I didn't like, I handed in my exam and I got to leave Aarhus for a while. Not too shabby!

And now we start in the final module, which I can't wait until it's over. I already see myself having more issues with the content and the structure of the course.

But whatever. I'm back in Toronto in 38 days from today and I'm totally excited!

Until then, I'll keep counting down the days ... and the cals!

Bookstore bargains, giftless Diwali celebrations ... and it's now CIC + G!

2008-11-02T17:21:00.006-05:00

It's now t-minus 47 days until I leave Aarhus!

I am just so bored here! I'm literally losing my mind!

And by losing my mind, I mean I'm buying random crap on eBay that I have no use for whatsoever! Someone please help me!

Anyways, I would have posted a blog late last week, but we had no internet in my house for an entire weekend. I know, it was really tough – and trying to use the public library's computers was completely pointless because they are so slow. I mean I couldn't even check my e-mail properly, let alone Facebook or YouTube!

Our house finally got back online on Monday, which was a huge relief. I felt so out of the loop and there was lots of news to catch up on – and yes, that includes both hard news, like Canadian politics, but also the soft news, like what's going on in Hollywood.

So yeah, it's been a pretty interesting week or so over here.

Like on Wednesday I ventured out to a bookstore in “downtown” Aarhus that was closing. I saw a sign that said they were having a 50% off sale and I knew I had to visit – if anything, I now know that the Danes are actually aware of what a sale constitutes. I mean, it should be against the law to call 20% off a sale price!

I actually ended up spending two and a half hours browsing through the books. I walked in at like 2pm and walked out at 4:45pm. And trust me, this is a big accomplishment – this store is nothing like Chapters ... not even Coles!

And guess what ... there wasn't one book on celebrities or entertainment news. Everything was academic!

I ended up buying four books – that's right, 4! I got Failed States by Noam Chomsky, Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser, a book on censoring culture, and ...

Okay, well, if I'm honest, I did pick up an entertainment-related book on screenplays. But before you start judging, here's how I rationalized buying it.

I figure since I'm so bored, I'll just start writing a lot more. And I'm now finding inspiration for stories everywhere – everything from a random comment in class to waiting for the bus and wondering what the 40-something that's sneaking out of a sex shop does for a living.

Plus, the guy who owned the bookstore gave it to me for free. I couldn't decide which book I wanted and he said that he'd rather give the book to someone he know would use it – see, a little charm pays dividends!

And speaking of screenplays and writing, I'm trying to find an agency that accepts unsolicited submissions, so if you've got any connections or leads, please let me know.*

* Honestly, I only want an agent so that when I win an Oscar for Best Screenplay and Best Actor, I can thank my agent, after thanking my parents, the Academy and the host of gods and god-like people I pray to!

Anyways, bringing it back into focus ...

Wednesday was also the day we had a Diwali party, and it was awesome.

And of course, they had food, but you know me, I let everyone else go before attempting to sample the food.

I still think that buffet battle scars are so late 90s trailer park style. 2008 is all about the Shopping Catfight battle scars because those you can proudly wear anywhere!

Sadly, I did not get any gifts during this Diwali celebration. Apparently, only children get small gifts, so I've decided that I'm starting my own off-shoot of Hinduism where you always get gifts.

Well that, and I'm looking for a new holiday to replace Diwali with ... preferably something where you get lots of gifts. So if you know of any, please let me know.*

*Wow, I'm really asking a lot of the people who read my blog!

Anyways, Friday was our final day in our second module. And I'm incredibly happy it's over. Not just because I didn't learn anything new, but the longer it went on, the more jaded about the program I became.

But Friday was more important for other reasons. It was a very monumental day for my newly-formed alliance, CIC.

We had our first annual CIC coffee meeting and upon review, we've recently expanded our alliance – it's now CIC + G!

We've admitted Germany because we felt we needed a little European representation - and you know, I've always said I'm 1/8 German at heart!

And don't worry, they're aware that Canada's natural resources have been allocated to China and India in exchange for my appointment to a high-ranking cabinet position in the soon-to-be-announced world government. That's right, CIC +G is all about nepotism and political corruption at its finest!

And of course now that Germany is in, everyone else will want to be in. Pretty soon it'll be like a new UN ... everyone will be doing it and it'll go out of style. That's okay, I can always form new alliances, you know, because everyone wants Canada's natural resources.

Anyways, Friday night also happened to be Halloween And here's my take on this “holiday” ... Honestly, once you stop going out for a little trick or treat action, Halloween is pretty boring.

It's sooooooooooo overrated and quite frankly, it's only a legitimate reason for people to dress really bad and make huge fashion blunders. Like the girls I saw wearing shoulder pads – I don't care if you're trying to look like a cracked-out 80s diva, shoulder pads are always a big NO!

Thank goodness it's only one day though.

So anyways, there was a huge party out in Skoldhoj, which, I'm sorry to all my homies from out that way, is literally in the middle of nowhere. It takes forever to get there.

Although, bus #15, which takes me on a tour of Braband, Aarhus' "ghetto", is my new favourite bus in Aarhus. I love how multicultural it is and I love walking on the bus and be all, “Take that bitches, now me and my half-blackness are the majority!”

Anyways there was supposed to be a trashy party at Skoldhoj, and I think we all know that I'd have a field day at an event like that, so I just stuck to our small pre-party and left at midnight.

And for the record, if you want to know what I dressed up as, I went as myself. I figure my personality, on a really bad day, is a hell of a lot more scary than any ghost or chainsaw-wielding psychopath!

I mean, c'mon, when it's like the time of the month, I know I can be brutal! Although we haven't gotten to that point ... yet ... but we have come very close!

So yeah, catching the last bus from Skoldhoj was fun and not just because the bus was full of drunk and 1/2 drunk university kids. Mostly it was because they all decided to break out into song ... only, it was a Christmas carol!

I wanted to let them know they had the holidays wrong, but whatever, I figured I shouldn't harsh on their mellow times. But the singing was soooooo off key – I felt like showing them how a real stage *DIVA* does it, but I just didn't have the whole “I'll show you how to belt it out like Mizz Houston” outfit on.

Finally, Saturday was my dear (and very financially-savvy) friend Roman's birthday party and it was at the University Bar, which surprisingly, is actually a nice place. I mostly went because I'm sure in London I'll be relying on Roman, you know, because I'll be walking around with an earpiece and I'll be, "Ummm, Roman, what the heck is the Dow Jones and why is my money now worth less than 10 minutes ago!"

Anyways, the party was great and his wife, Klara, is totally awesome and I love her hair – it's like Halle Berry's 2000-2002 short n' spiky style meets Posh Spice's edgy 2007 asymmetric bob. It's FIERCE and it's FABULOUS!

Anyways, that's pretty much it. And this week stands to be pretty boring since it's our exam week.

Again, this question, like the last one, is absolutely ridiculous. It's just like every other question we've been given in this class, so I'm not sure why I'm complaining since it seems to be a trend.

But whatever, either way, I'm sticking my tried and tested method – I'll dress really well when I hand in the assignment and I'll compliment the secretary so that my essay gets passed along to the easy marker!

And if all else fails, I'll just do the honourable (north)-American thing ... I'll bitch, moan, and complain until I get my way.

And if that takes too long, well then, I'll just have to call my trusty lawyer and initiate a class-action lawsuit and allege that this question somehow defames my character and that I'm entitled to pain & suffering plus punitive damages!

You know, because that's just how we do it "north of the 49"!

Will this program make me lose my Andrew-ness?

2008-10-23T16:39:00.001-04:00

So, since I came back from Copenhagen, it's been pretty hectic.

Starting with my room situation, I've dug in my heels in (and no, not my stiletto heels!) and I refuse to pay my rent until I get a massive discount from my landlord.

I mean, you can't just walk into someone's room and start construction. And just because it was the week of the Autumn break doesn't automatically mean I'll be away – some of us still have classes.

Plus, I'm convinced that all the construction has made me sick ... either that, or my seasonal allergies are acting up again!

If that's the case, I'm really worried. Last time I had allergies this bad, I lost my voice for those two fateful weeks in grade 11.

Can you imagine my not speaking for a day – let alone a week or two?

But anyways, being sick has let me focus on other things.

Like I recently e-mailed the coordinators from Amsterdam and asked them why they changed the course. I wasn't really happy with the elimination of Entertaining the Citizen.

That was totally my chance to shine. It was going to be my opportunity to really share my celebrity and entertainment knowledge.

Sadly, it won't happen. I wasn't impressed with the rationale behind the decision, even though I said I was, you know, because I'm such a nice Canadian and I try and avoid conflict.

And you know what, I have a real problem with schools, departments and programs that act unilaterally and do not consult students when making massive changes.

What was really interesting was their view that Entertaining the Citizen had too many American examples. What does that mean?!

I mean, c'mon, of course it will have a lot of American examples because America is home to major media conglomerates.

But I don't know ... this anti-(North)Americanism seems to be the way this program is structured. I knew when I applied that I was in for a program that differed from North America, but it almost seems as though in an effort to be pro-European, there is a dismissal of other valid ideas, viewpoints, and courses.

And ironically, it's made me really question whether or not I belong here. I miss the plurality of viewpoints, experiences, and theories I was offered at York. And again, I wonder if this course will even help me to get to where I want to be in 5 years.

But whatever. I think I can deal with it.

And even though the replacement course in Amsterdam seems like an exact repetition of a course offered in the Hamburg specialism, I think I'll survive.

All I need is a brand new outfit and shoes, my eyebrows carefully waxed, and a new, bitchier pair of glasses and I'll be good to go. Bring on the professors – they won't be able to resist my charm and my sense of style!

Anyways, we're also winding down the second module. I can finally see the finish line. Thank goodness!

I'm just glad it's almost over since it is such a repeat of my undergrad studies. And they've got some messed up rules here.

Like for example, if you are one word over the word limit, they won't mark your paper.

And to make it worse, the references you do (either in-text or with footnotes) are counted too. So that means, in an essay where I have 50 two-word citations, I lose 100 words.

Trust me, I can say a lot within 100 words ... just like I can say a lot in 100 seconds!

But like I said, I'll be glad once this course is over. I need to move on to something new.

Although for some reason, these past few classes, I've been really fired up. I think it's because I was wearing Republican Red when we were talking about terrorism and you know how much the GOP loves their terrorist rhetoric!

But more importantly, I'm also impressed with how academic I can be. Like this one debate we had, I didn't make one reference to to celebrities or entertainment news!

I know, it's shocking!

And I don't know whether that's a good thing or not. I'm worried that this program is making me more “academic” and I'll lose my Andrew-ness!*

* Well, I don't think that'll happen because we all know that if I just watch Mean Girls I'll be back to my old self!

On the plus side, I did finally buy a substantial item of clothing from Aarhus. Of course, it came from H&M since it's the only store I can afford.

I bought these great denim jean shorts that easily make me look 5-10 pounds thinner ... and you know how important that is to me!

I'm already planning outfits for debut in late spring/summer in Amsterdam. You know, you've got to think ahead and since I hate my wardrobe right now, I'll focus on another season.

And really, focusing on spring and summer is a good thing because I heard that in a week or so, it'll start to get dark at like 4:30ish in the afternoon.

I just can't have that. I need my vitamin D and my sunlight!

Then again, charging me a little happy can easily overcome any vitamin D deficiency. After all, the lighting in malls and stores gives me vitamin D ... right?!

And don't worry, I won't be spending any real money, because I have a plan.

I know, I'm smart enough to actually plan something ... other than the theme of my outfits for a particular week.

So here's what I'll do.

This Saturday, I'll visit an H&M here and buy an item that costs about 400 Danish Crowns, like a new pair of jeans.

Next week, I'll visit a different H&M and return the jeans and buy something else.

I'll continue this pattern of returning an item and buying something new for the next 8 weeks until I leave for home.

The way I see it, I'll be walking out of each H&M with a new item while technically not spending any money.

And to make it even better, a week before I leave, I'll just return the item(s) for cash.

Seriously, think about it. Each week I have a new item that obviously I won't wear, but I still get to walk out of the store with a little something new.

Now that's clever!

I am so smrt ... S – M – R – T!?

Wait ... I mean S – M – A – R – T!

Keeping it FIERCE in Copenhagen with the ladies of CIC

2008-10-15T17:50:00.006-04:00

So this past week has been pretty boring on the academic front. I don't know how much more of this module I can take. It is such a repeat of what I did at York – it's gotten to the point that without at least two coffees, I'll fall asleep in class.

Anyways, this past weekend was also our first group trip – and it was to Copenhagen.

First of all, we decided to leave for Copenhagen at 6:45am! I know, talk about way too early! I had major bags under my eyes and looked horrible. And you know that I kept my sunglasses with me at all times, you know, so I could pull off the whole “I'm a freaking DIVA” attitude.

So the bus ride wasn't really a full bus ride in the end – instead it was half ferry half bus. It was an okay ride, but I was just thankful that I found the lifeboats, you know in case anything happened. And as I told everyone on the trip, if anything were to happen, I'll take my own boat and I promise to call for help once I've reached land. You know, just because I care so much!

So when we arrived in Copenhagen and got to the hostel, I quickly teamed up members of CIC – Medha and Sakshi.

*Sidenote: Just so you know, I've unilaterally withdrawn Canada from NAFTA and instead joined CIC – it's a new global alliance of emerging superpowers (China and India) along with a middle power with tons of natural resources (Canada). I figure that when the world comes to war, I won't have to worry because China and India will totally have Canada's back. Plus, when they install a new world government, I've been promised the position of Minister of Fashion, Style and Attitude!

Anyways, we first we went to see the Danish Design Centre (DDC) which literally was a museum designed to showcase Danish innovations in various aspects of design. Some of the exhibits were interesting – like the “lonely people” jacket made out of velcro and the dresser that was comprised of mini-suitcases. But my favourite was the tray of vials depicting the medicating lifestyle we have adopted. And you know me, I had to pick up the vial with “Addiction Liberation”. And don't worry, I've already asked the DDC to keep a large stock on hand for my pre-talkshow fame stint in rehab!

So after that, we decided we needed to do a little shopping. I've had very little success in my “Charge Me Some Happy” campaign in Aarhus and I was hoping Copenhagen would be different.

Sadly, it wasn't! Everything was too expensive and the fashion trends right now are not ones I can pull off. But just so you know, if you suffer from extreme “bow-legged-ness” (is that even a word?!), then you should definitely fly over to Denmark and shop because it seems like all the jeans over here are made for that.

After overcoming my bout of depression from an unsuccessful shopping campaign, we visited a round tower that looked like the rooks you play chess with. It had a children's puppet exhibit in one of the rooms you pass by on the way up the tower – ironically, the room had it's own distinct aroma of baby barf meets fresh wood.

And let me tell you, I'm surprised Danish children aren't possessed or disturbed. Some of the puppets were so depressing and dark. Although my favourite is the one I've named Ms. “Cracked-out Hoebag” Piggy. Her boobs were half showing and she looked spaced out. I was completely floored when I saw that and was literally like “Hello, where is the religious right of America?!”

Anyways, the views on the top of the tower were nice, although the program said that the ascent was stair-free and there were like 20 stairs. So in the true (North) American spirit, I'm suing them for false advertising? Anybody feel like being a lawyer today?

After all that walking, we made it back to the hostel in time to meet up with everyone for dinner. We decided to go out as a group to a Chinese restaurant. Now, since I'm technically ¼ Chinese (you know, mostly for the red envelope during New Year's thing), I figured I should see how the Danes take on Chinese cuisine.

I wasn't impressed. My meal was très salty – I might as well have just had a shaker full of salt on plain egg noodles. But that's okay, because I totally had to drink lots of water and we all know how much I just LOVE water ... especially ice water! Hello negative cals!

After dinner, half of the group decided to venture out to a jazz club, but since I'm not that jazzy myself, I skipped it and decided to plan my day tomorrow. Well that, and I was looking really tired and since you never know who you'll run into, I had to get some major beauty sleep and plan my outfit for Sunday.

Sunday finally came around and we decided to go all over. We started at the National Museum (because it's free and you know how cheap I can be), which was interesting. By far the best part was when Vicky (one of the China reps in CIC) hopped onto the horse in an effort to look for her man – and by extension, the cute little Danish baby she'd like to abduct ... I mean adopt!

Next on the list was to see Christiana, which is the self-governing community in Copenhagen. I was definitely not impressed – the whole idea of segregation is something that I would hope wouldn't occur in Canada. You know, can't we all just get along and sing Celine Dion! Honestly, I felt like breaking out into My Heart Will Go On because you know that it would've definitely smoothed over any issues in the relations between Christiana's citizens and Danes!

On the plus side, we only spent an hour in Christiana. And the sign on the way out says that you are now entering the EU so once I stepped across the line, I raised my arm and was like, “Smell the regulation folks ... SMELL THE REGULATION!”

After that, we took the metro to see the Little Mermaid. Now just a note to the Copenhagen transport people – the person who made the ticket-punching machines needs to get fired because 4 Masters students could not get it working properly!

Anyways, when we made it to see the Little Mermaid and I wasn't impressed. You know, girlfriend has been sitting in the same pose for ever it seems. She needs to change it up – I feel like her style has stagnated. And where was my favourite Disney villain, Ursula? She was nowhere to be found and sadly that meant no “Poor Unfortunate Souls” duet between myself and Ursula! Too bad, it could've been great – two divas of the stage collide for an unforgettably bitchy song duet!

On the plus side, CIC ended up meeting a professor from the University of Wyoming, Cindy Price who was awesome. She knew lots about the Mundus program and was visiting Scandinavia on research – I give her credit because I highly doubt I could visit a foreign country to do research ... unless that research involved comparing sales and professional shopping techniques!

So that was Sunday pretty much – although we did have a drink in a smoky jazz bar. The music wasn't very good and I was almost tempted to pick up the mic and try a little stand-up comedy.

Anyways, on Monday, we ended up walking around some more. We visited Copenhagen's oldest bakery, which was nice – the coffee was somewhat blah, but they had nice desserts. I bought two and told myself that we can just walk (or starve) it off later!

Then we took a walk to see the changing of the guard at the Royal Palace – I like how much more accessible the Danish royalty seem to be. Literally, the guards were like walking in front of me. It gave me a great chance to see that the horrible cerulean blue pants they must wear and that some of the guards need to shine their shoes!

Once that was over, we walked downtown towards the library. We saw this great store with a sign that read, “Fashion is for idiots! (like us)” and you know I had to get my picture taken.

As we continued walking, we decided that instead of visiting the International Press Centre, we were going to visit the state library, also known as The Black Diamond! And you know me, if something is diamond I have to see it!

The library was great. The architecture and design was simply stunning and if Aarhus or Toronto had a library like that, I'd actually visit it – and not just to gossip but to also read and be all academic! Plus, they had a collection of editorial cartoons of Danish politicians and I think we literally spent like 20 minutes discussing just one! I felt so academic and so S-M-R-T ... I mean S-M-A-R-T!

After the library, it was soon time to leave, but we decided to visit Vestboro, which is their version of the Red Light District. It was uber trashy. Sex stores everywhere! Although I did think it was interesting to see a church right beside a sex store that showed 24-hour porn. It was like religious right meets slutty left!

Sadly, I had to leave Copenhagen without buying anything. I did see this charcoal gray wrap cardigan that I wanted. I tried it on and I loved it, but it was 800 Danish Crowns, which is like $160 Canadian. And you know, given my reputation as a bargain hunter, I just couldn't buy it! The cardigan wasn't on sale and thus, it violated like my fundamental core value – never buy anything at full price!

All in all, it was a fun trip and the ride home seemed a lot shorter. Plus I did get a chance to perfect my knitting!

When we finally arrived in Aarhus, it felt good to be back. I missed knowing where everything is and was just looking forward to settling in and catching up on sleep.

Yeah, that didn't happen because when I arrived home, I found my room a mess as my landlord, without asking my permission or giving me notice, decided to change the windows in my room. While I thank him for that, all of my stuff was coated in this fine white plaster powder.

On the plus side, I did give me something to clean and since my clothes also got dirty, I also have an excuse to do more laundry!

YAY!*

* Okay, perhaps I need to get out more?!

Anyways, stay tuned because my project for the week is to now get my November rent reduced!

Oh, and I almost forgot, I launched a new YouTube show, A Dose of Andrew. Please check it out by clicking on this link. Tell me what you think of my show (the good and the bad) – and please subscribe!

Worker bars, VP debates, and teaching the ladies how we do the booty shake!

2008-10-04T09:03:00.004-04:00

The first week of classes in our new module is complete and this one seems like it will be a 4-week rehash of what I learned at York ... or should have learned but was too busy catching up with the latest from People, In Touch, and Hello Canada.

Our class is now on the Aarhus University campus, which is great. I can roll out of bed 10-minutes before class is to start and still get there on time.

Right ... like I would ever do that!

We all know that I'm up at least an hour before class, monopolizing the the bathroom while I get ready and decide what I'm going to wear.

Not that I'm vain or shallow or anything like that (* P.S. You know, I can hear the laughs from the people who think otherwise), but I need to take my time in the morning.

After all, as I always say, life is a runway and you've got to look good and act FIERCE all the time!

And that's why I take so long in the morning to get ready - you never know who you are going to meet.

Plus, when you're like me and constantly confused with a D-list Canadian celebrity (paging Aubrey Graham, aka Drake), you have to look good!

Anyways, since Aarhus is so small, there wasn't much going on this week. On Monday night, we went out to celebrate the fact that we finished our first module and exam.

We ventured to the same "worker's bar" that I visited before with Leo and Michelle. And yes, it was still raw, and edgy, and ... well I'm not quite sure how else to describe it - so feel free to insert your own adjective.

I also showed some of the group my trademark ... a front handspring with another handspring step-out. Even with the small form breaks and a step on the landing, I managed to score a 9.7 and win the silver - but I'm still convinced the Chinese girl who beat me is underage (paging the girl who stole Nastia's gold medal, He Kexin).

Anyways, this week I also watched the VP debate on Thursday night and into early Friday morning with Nora (Ms. Germany) and Thomas (Monsieur de Français). After seeing McCain and Obama go at it, I wanted to see how Palin would handle the debate.

And surprisingly, she did well. She held her own and really went after Biden - who tried to steal a page from Clinton's book by getting "choked up" when answering a question. Plus, she looked great and immediately set the tone of the evening when she walked right up to him and asked him if she could call him Joe!

I may completely disagree with her policies, but I give her credit for saying exactly what she believes in and what she stands for. Plus, I'm convinced that the winks and the hockey-mom references were totally directed at people like me ... you know, the SUV driving soccer moms who formerly supported Clinton but feel unease about Obama!

Even though the debate was at 3am in the morning here, I still stayed up and despite only 4 hours of sleep, I think Friday was a pretty productive and fashionable day!

Friday was also the day of the PF-Fest, a party thrown by the political science students at Aarhus University. At first, when I bought the ticket, I didn't know what to expect. Who would be there? Would it be a bunch of students sitting around a table debating Plato and arguing why Pax Americana is dead? Would there be music?

Surprisingly, it was pretty good. There were lots of people, many of whom decided to dress up - some even managed to hit the Richmond Street standard, while others kept it casual with an outfit that could double as something you'd paint your house in!

But, again, there was horrible music. I don't know what it is about the DJs over here. They can't get the music selection right. Obviously, they haven't heard of Billboard's Top 100 and the dance remixes that exist for pretty much every song on that chart!

I mean, there was a solid 30-minute stretch where they played 50s and 60s hits. But they did make some good choices, namely Britney Spears and the Baywatch theme.

And the dancing! Some of the dancing was horrible. I'm talking people who are offbeat and making all these weird arm movements. Just think of the horrible dancing on MuchMusic's Electric Circus and you'll know what I'm talking about.

Seriously, some of these people need to learn how to dance. Like, for example, there were a few couples trying to swing dance to the music. Ummm, you can't swing dance to "Piece of Me" or "Ghostbusters" ... you just can't!

And so, with that being said, I'll end this blog posting with a copy of the transcript from my latest show, "Tell Your Itch To TV's Newest Bitch"!

Today, on my new prime-time talk show, "Tell Your Itch To TV's Newest Bitch" we're talking about the booty shake and how to maximize your chances at finding that special someone on the dance floor.

Please enjoy this pre-programmed video segment and start practicing your booty shake with some Britney Spears (Piece of Me) or Pussycat Dolls (Beep) music

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=K88yBMzm4Dc

And, for my final thought of the day ...

Remember, on the dance floor, show your style, show your class ...
and definitely shake ya ass!

Please join me next week where we'll be discussing dance floor fashions - what works, what doesn't, and what outfits could result in pregnancy and major baby daddy drama.

Thank you for joining me and we'll see you next time!

*Roll credits*

Today on "An Afternoon with Andrew" ... writing exams, learning about history ... and a shocking revelation!

2008-09-26T15:08:00.024-04:00

So I've decided that my new talkshow will be titled "An Afternoon with Andrew"!

It's classy and upscale, it can totally compete with "The Oprah Winfrey Show" ... and I know that my fellow SUV-driving, Tim Horton's-drinking soccer/hockey moms will totally enjoy it!

Well, it's either that, or I go with "Tell Your Itch to TV's Newest Bitch" but I thought that might be a little too much - you know, a little too in-your-face for daytime television ... but primetime ... hellooooo to my second talk show!

On to more important things ... I'm very proud of myself - I've done my first graduate exam. Not that it was hard, but the question was messed up! I still managed to finish it though, simply by revisiting all of those boring globalization lectures at York.

And since I'm done, if I ever have to read about or speak the words "supraterritorial" or "transplanetary" again, I think I'll head for the nearest window and jump!

Anyways, since I finished my exam, I've had some free time to explore Aarhus. I found these great clay tennis courts near my house, although you supposedly have to be a member to use them.

Yeah, I just won't be following that rule. I think I'll play tomorrow, mostly because I don't want to forget how to hit my well-timed and beautifully-struck Monica Seles-inspired return of service.

Other than tennis, I've being checking out what else Aarhus has to offer. Like today, Kim and I decided to head out and check out Den Gamle By, Denmark's open-air old-town museum.

It's a nice little museum, although it's in an ironic spot, because on the other side of the road is this modern-looking skyscraper. Obviously, somebody in the city planning office needs to get fired!

At least the skyscraper let me know we were still close to modern humanity, you know, in case I get lost in all the history - I need to know that I'm close to modern amenities at all times!

The recreated village was alright - although it reminded me of Black Creek Pioneer Village meets the small museum in Thomson Park. And of course, no historical museum would be complete without real-life people acting out how life would have been like - some of them were a little scary since they took their job a little too seriously!

All I can say is that thank god I wasn't born back then. I don't know what I would've done. Sleeping on hay, toilets that don't flush, coffee that you have to grind by hand ... I just wouldn't have been able to do it.

But I am intrigued by the concept of moving two single beds together to make a double - if I could travel back in time, I'd be forced to let people know that just because it's two separate beds does not prevent pregnancy! I then would've introduced them to the concept of baby-daddy DNA tests and The Maury Povich Show!

Not only did the museum house replica houses built in the 1600 and 1700s, but there was also a special exhibit on circus posters and another on tobacco. The poster exhibit was boring, same with the tobacco one, although I've always been fascinated with 50s, 60s, and 70s cigarette ads because they are so simplistic and stereotypical yet very effective.

Like this one, obviously the girl, who's taken a page out of the Jane Fonda workout gear fashion book, decides that she wants to be on the phone while having a cigarette. I guess in the 60s, when you were done your daily cardio workout, you lit a cigarette and called up your girlfriend to gossip about your neighbours!

You know that if I see anybody doing that, I'll interrupt their conversation and be all, "I'm sorry, but all this is sooooo 1950s. Modernize girlfriend ... modernize!"

On the way home, we stopped in at my favourite new place in Aarhus, Brunn's Gallery. Of course, it's a mall ... remember, old habits die hard!

Every time I walk in, I feel so at home! I take a giant breath and know that regardless of where I am, malls are like my own personal mothership. That, and I felt like charging me a little happy on my newly minted Danske Bank credit card!

And you know, I've got to break that card in and charge a few items to it, because I hate when the cards in my wallet compete for my attention and get all jealous of each other. I like to ensure that each card gets equal opportunity to buy me something - it's my personal version of equal opportunity!

Sadly, the mall hadn't really changed merchandise in the two days since my last visit. So, I decided I'd check out Salling, which is a 4-floor department store in the centre of Aarhus - think Harrods only waaaaay less expensive.

Now I won't lie, I was attracted to the store because I heard they were having a huge sale, and wherever there's discounted merchandise, I have to at least make an appearance.

Well that, and the signs said GULD, which with my exceptional Danish language skills (*feel free to laugh now!), I was able to translate into GOLD! And as I say, if somethings written in gold, wrapped in gold, or has gold in the title, it must be good ... so by extension, this sale should be good too!

Should being the operative word ... it wasn't that great and I wasn't impressed. Nothing really caught my eye, and converting prices from Danish Crowns to Canadian dollars only made it worse!

But while I walked around the store, I did get a chance to notice how everyone is so nice here * ... almost too nice! You can't be nice when shopping. It's a sport and the gold medal is finding the bargain of the century. And I'm sorry, but I'm all about winning the gold medal at any cost ... teamwork and being nice are completely overrated when it comes to shopping!

* On a side note, I'd love to drop some of these people into a store during Black Friday or Boxing Day just to see how they'd react!

Like case in point, I was looking for a pair of jeans and rummaging through a huge pile of denim and people actually waited until I was done before joining in the fun. If that was me in a store in Buffalo, I so would've jumped right in, using my long and lean reach to maximize my bargain hunting prowess!

Now, for those of you standing up, I recommend taking a seat here. I have breaking news ...

Sadly, I have to inform you that I ...

I ...

I walked out of the store empty-handed!

I felt naked without a bag on my arm. It was weird you know ... like the world is falling apart!

I mean, it's one thing for the financial markets in the US to be crashing, but for me to walk out of major store sale without at least one bag is a real indication that something is wrong ... like the apocalypse is upon us!

But that's okay, I'm sure there will be other sales, and I'll be ready for all of them ... all of my credit cards are raring to go!

And just like I told my fellow Mundusians last Friday that I was exporting North American Dessert Culture, next time there's a sale, I'll do the honourable thing and export the North American Bargain Hunting mentality ... which, let's be honest, is totally my personal mantra!

Exporting North American Dessert Culture ... and Celine Dion!

2008-09-21T13:56:00.004-04:00

So like I said previously, this week has been really busy – having class 4 times a week is really tough. Thank goodness I only went to York twice a week. I can't handle all this learning – just as Lisa Simpson's Malibu Stacy doll would say, “Learning causes wrinkles!

Anyways, starting with the good stuff. Monday was a day off for us, which was great. I cleaned, and don't judge me ... yes, I'm a little OCD when it comes to cleanliness. Maybe my pre-talkshow fame stint in Promises Rehab Centre in Malibu can be for an addiction to cleaning! Now that would definitely land me on the cover of People and perhaps, US Weekly & In Touch!

The rest of the week we had guest professors giving lectures on particular aspects of reporting. Tuesday and Wednesday were reserved for Kevin Williams' talk on reporting and war. It was pretty interesting - plus he showed two CBC documentaries and I was all like, "That's right, Canada does make good journalism, and no, we don't tow the same foreign policy as the US!"

Thursday was by far the most interesting day for me. Neil Henry, a professor from UC Berkley gave a lecture on Obama, Palin and the US media. Now, we all know that Hilary was my home-girl from the start of the primaries, so I'm definitely biased. In the end, this one professor felt that Obama would win – I'm not so sure about that!

After that guest lecturer, we also had a partner reception at school which was a chance to meet the reps from University of Amsterdam and City University. It was great having the opportunity to meet with them and get some of the practicalities sorted out – unfortunately, it seems like the next big – apparently, it is really tough. And I'm not ready for the whole homeless thing – it's a look I just can't pull off!

And so, to all the students in my class, please note that I'm now accepting applications for the position of “Roommate”. The job doesn't pay anything, except you get a clean place to live in (along with my always colourful play-by-play commentary on life), in exchange for a constant flow of lattes. And of course, you must dress well and have a sense of style – anybody who wears UGG boots and sweatpants will not be screened through to the interview stage. If interested, please e-mail my assistant!

Anyways, the partner reception also gave me a chance to corner the reps from City University and ask them about getting a summer internship. I really doubt I'd be able to get anything substantial in Toronto because I'm not in a Canadian university/college. And so now I'm thinking I might leave from Amsterdam and head straight to London and get settled and start an internship, preferably something on-air for the BBC – you know, since I'm sooooo British!

And then Friday ... what to say about Friday. Class was okay, and at night, we were having a Trip Around The World Party. In a nutshell, everyone was supposed to bring a dish from their native country.

Now coming from Canada, I was trying really hard to think of our national dish. A medium double-double from Tim Hortons? Kraft Dinner? Pancakes and maple syrup?

And that ultimately lead to the bigger question of what is Canadian culture, but I won't tackle that here. I'll save it for the communication studies students at York who'll argue this in Media, Culture & Society.

In the end, I decided to bring two store-bought cakes. My rationale is the following:

In Canada ... correction, North America ... we buy our desserts from the store when going to a party. So instead of introducing you to Canadian cuisine, I'm introducing you to North American Dessert Culture! In fact, you could say that I'm simply exporting culture!

I'd have to say that the best part of the party was when people started singing the songs from their home country. I missed most of it (since I'm known for going a little Simon Cowell when I hear bad singing) but when they asked Canada to start singing, I wasn't sure what to do.

I decided that instead of O Canada, we would sing My Heart Will Go On, since Celine is one of our most known (and liked or disliked) exports. And just in typical Canadian fashion, it brought people together and next thing you knew, we were all standing around in a circle belting out the Titanic hit.

Sadly, my song had to come to a close and then a few other people tried their hand at singing – bit sadly, nobody else really brought everyone together like Celine does!

And since we've already done the cultural thing, I'll be hosting the next party. For those interested, it will be a theme party – Martinis & Mean Girls.

This party won't be loud or crazy – there will be classy cocktails and nice desserts - no beer allowed. There will be a screening of Mean Girls, because apparently some people haven't seen it (*cough Aradhana)

And following that will be a thorough academic analysis of the film from a realist/constructivist lens that draws on a strong theoretical framework of Scholte's concept of “transnational social connections” with a dash of “supra-territoriality”!

* By the way, that last paragraph is an inside joke – only Mundusians will get it! *

Roadtrippin' it to Skagen with Ms. Germany & Ms. India

2008-09-19T04:05:00.013-04:00

So, it's been a busy week for me in Aarhus. And no, it's not because I've become chronically addicted to buying crap on eBay that I don't need - I can fully rationalize all of my eBay purchases, thank you very much!

On to more important things ... on Sunday, Nora (aka Ms. Germany), Aradhana (aka Ms. India) and I decided to visit Skagen and Grenea, the northernmost point in Denmark.

But before I could even get into the car on Sunday morning, I had to pick my extremely tired self out of bed. Why so tired you ask? Well, the night before, I didn't fall asleep until 3:00am!

And no, it's not because I was out partying. On the contrary, we had a small party at our house that I thought was over at 12:30am when most people left.

Yeah, that didn't happen - it seemed like it continued upstairs in the kitchen beside my room. Honestly, I only had peace when people went outside for a cigarette. And I was really close to getting up and locking the door, but I kept hoping that it would get quieter - it didn't and it seems like this pattern has started repeating itself, just as I thought we had changed the image of our house away from that of the Party/Frat house!

But whatever, even though I was really tired, I still managed to get up early to make sure I looked good for our road trip. After all, you never know who you'll meet while driving along the highway!

So, driving there, we ended up taking a detour through Aalborg - let's just say it was interesting.

Now, we all know that I'm the least judgmental person out there (okay, for those of you laughing, let it out now!) ... but I found Aalborg very depressing. It reminded me of what an old Soviet town would have looked like. It seemed really gray and industrial. It was definitely raw, urban, and in a depressing way, edgy!

And while driving through the city, we didn't even find one open coffee shop. Granted, it was a Sunday morning, but you'd think that at least one would be open by 11am. Without a coffee, I found myself absolutely mesmerized by the bridge that let tall ships pass through ... this is what happens when I'm suffering through a massive caffeine withdrawal combined with about 5 hours of sleep.

So after driving through Aalborg, we took another detour, this time to Lokken - which, by the way is nowhere near Skagen. But, the beaches they had were really nice. And they had a swing where we recreated the famous Dirty Dancing final dance/song number.

Anyways, there were these really weird looking buildings though on the beach. At first, we figured they might be to prevent erosion to the houses situated on top of the dune-looking hills. But then I decided that this must be where all the adventurous people come to join the Deep Sea club ... you know, since being part of the Mile High Club is so late 1990s.

We finally made it to Skagen at about 4pm and it was really worth it. The sight of the two seas colliding was really cool. Plus, the town had a really small-town quaint charm about it. It's definitely worth driving up there and spending a night and having a nice latte in the morning while sitting on the beach and getting some much needed Vitamin D.

We left Skagen about 5:30pm and took the correct way home, all the while jamming to the Danish radio. It was hilarious because they only played one Danish song and the rest were in English - granted, it seemed like late 1990s/early 2000s pop and rap.

But driving through the small towns and villages in Denmark was nice, although being from Toronto, I'd miss the hustle and bustle of the big city.

Oh, and as a final thought (just like how I'd do on my talkshow) I'm definitely loving how Nora drives. She totally was clocking at least 120-130 km/h on the highway, just like I would be in the fast-lane on the 401. She's so typically German in that way, and that's what I about her - she drives just like I do!

Now all she needs is a mid-size SUV and a few kids in the back and she'd be a bona fide Soccer Mom ... oops, I mean Football Mom!

Friday fun at Ikea ... and Baresso has nothing on Starbucks!

2008-09-15T09:25:00.009-04:00

Seems like my time in Aarhus is going by really quickly - just one more week to go before I'm done the first module. It couldn't come soon enough though, because I'm starting to go through massive Tim Horton's withdrawal. I'm even missing crappy Canadian television shows.

Okay, so this past week was good. I feel like I'm not learning that much, given that my background is in political science, but I'm still having fun chatting away with everyone. Well that, and the good gossip has started going around, and you know I'm all over that!

So on Friday, I "debuted" a new outfit. See, over here in Denmark, I don't just wear a new outfit, I "debut" it, because, you know, it just sounds better! Well that, and I'm studying journalism and really, it's about how I look - not about how smart I am!

Plus, now it's getting colder and windier so my options have dramatically increased. I mean, we all know I'm about fall colours and fabrics, so I'm glad that summer is over and cool weather is on its way. But if I'm here and it starts snowing in Denmark, I think I'll just about die!

Anyways, Friday was also my second time shopping in Ikea over here. I went with Christina, or XXX-Tina as she's now know. She's American, so you know we totally get along ... except when it comes to foreign policy and health care!

We went mostly because she wanted stuff for her room - like me, she didn't get that much when she moved in. I went mostly because I wanted to charge me a little happy. I figure, if I'm buying stuff and happy, I won't resort to other comfort addictions that some people have ... like eating!

Okay, so first things first. I totally remember taking Bus #3 with Kim when we went last time. Yeah, ummm, who knew that Aarhus had two different Bus #3 routes - one that goes to AarhusNord and the other that goes to Trige.

And of course, with Kim I took the Aarhus Nord #3, but with XXX-Tina, we ended up going to Trige. It's a part of Aarhus (I think) that has a small town feel ... wait a second, all of Aarhus has that feeling!

It's so small town that I only counted one gas station and supermarket. I'm sure there are more, but still, I was a little freaked out when I got off the bus. After speaking to the bus driver, and incidentally, not getting that much help, we made our way back to the Ikea that we passed on our way to Trige.

And I didn't realize how much fun it is walking through Ikea. I love putting rooms together with different pieces of furniture. Honestly, I cannot wait to have my own two-bedroom condo downtown - it will be impeccably decorated!

Of course, the good deals aren't to be had in the upper floor of Ikea. You have to walk through these rooms to get to the downstairs part, which is where all the bargains can be found. And boy, did we find some bargains.

Like for example, I got this great fleece blanket for 9 Danish Crowns - like $2 Canadian. And I finally bought a new frying pan because the ones in my house have the black stuff coming off and you know that stuff causes cancer - and as I always say, I'm too young to die and I'm definitely not dying of cancer!

So we make our purchase and on the way out decide to get coffee - of course, it comes out of a machine - yuck!

And then, the most hilarious thing happened. You know how I say I'm a professional shopper - I can easily manage three bags on each hand with a coffee and my cell phone, along with my credit card strategically placed in my left pocket. Well, I definitely had an un-graceful moment.

So with a coffee in one hand, a bucket with my stuff in the other, and a box to make a clothes hanger, I walked fiercely out the store. Maybe a little too fierce because after taking 15 steps, everything started falling. First my bucket (causing my candle to break) followed by the box, and then the piece de resistance ... my coffee!

And you know, there is nothing fierce about spilling your coffee and breaking one of the candles you just bought. It was totally embarrassing! Thank goodness nobody recognized me as the stand-in for the wheelchair kid from Degrassi - that would have ruined my fledgling career!

But whatever, I kept walking anyways and didn't turn back. XXX-Tina got some coffee on her, but that's okay, I told her to bring her blouse to my house and with my trusty laundry products, I can get any stain out. Plus, since I brought a steamer from home, we can have a steaming party too! *

* I know, I'm definitely OCD and need some help! *

So with all our stuff, we wait like 40 minutes for the bus and end up taking this really cool regional coach back home. I loved the seats and totally think I'll just travel on these buses all the time.

University's birthday. I equated that to mean university-sponsored When I got off at my stop, I realized that the huge Friday Bar was still going on. A little history behind that - apparently, this is the largest Friday Bar because it is in "honour" of Aarhusdrunkeness.

Coming from Canada, I'm really surprised at how much university-sanctioned boozing there is here - like, if this was Toronto, you know someone would already have sued the university and
they would've been forced to cancel all events. Hello Queen's Homecoming in Kingston!

Essentially, it was an excuse for people to get pissed drunk and flop around, listening to craptacular indie music while freezing. I'm sorry, but I had better things to do with my time, like catch up on the second season of Brothers & Sisters in anticipation of the season premiere next Sunday.

So yeah, Friday was good. And on Saturday, I went to the beach. This time, I headed to the south beach which is a million times better than the one in the north. For one thing, there's less seaweed, cleaner sand, and a nice path you can walk along in the south. Plus, along the way, I saw some clay tennis courts that I'm desperate to use!

I spent a while at the beach making sure I got a healthy dose of vitamin D, since you know, if you're deficient in that you can have all sorts of problems. On my way home, I decided to stop at Baresso, which is the de facto Starbucks here. Honestly, it is way too overpriced and the chain has nothing on Starbucks. The only thing that I like it for is the atmosphere - in fact, I came up with some great ideas for my new screenplay.

When I got home, I found out that my housemates were having a party. You know, when you come home and you're just tired and want to relax? Yeah, that was me, but I felt bad, so I hung around outside for a while.

The party lasted for about 5 hours and I met a few interesting people studying law and such - all the power to them, because I couldn't do it. But I told them that when I have my own talkshow, I'll definitely need a lawyer, because you know, I can't be held responsible for my outrageous comments!

So that was Friday and Saturday. I'll be posting a recap of Sunday later, because, let's just say, it was a long day that involved visiting everything from the crappy to the beautiful!

My Oscar-nominated role in "Room Service" ... and the realities of clubs in Aarhus

2008-09-06T07:53:00.020-04:00

It's been a few days since I uploaded a new post on my blog. And you know, it's tough to keep the blog up when I'm trying to be a good student and actually do the readings - I'm testing my hypothesis that doing readings actually lowers my grade point average!

Anyways, I've officially finished one week of classes and my final thoughts on it - I'm still undecided about the programme. Based on what we've done so far, I can tell that the programme is very theoretical, but I still think it offers me the chance to still be me - loud, obnoxious, and talkshow-obsessed with a hint of intelligent observations related to entertainment news.

So far, class has been pretty good. It's definitely different that being at York. We only meet with the professor for about 30 minutes at 10am, and then we break off into groups and discuss the material until 12pm. Lunch for an hour (or in my case, just keeping it simple with a bottle of water and a coffee). Then we meet with our TA for an hour to prepare a presentation, then from 2-4pm, it's showtime.

Actually, the week started off really good with an awesome presentation I made on realism in global politics. I definitely hit all the key points and I can thank Professor Whitworth of POLS 2930 for all that. And honestly, all I needed was a camera, a microphone attached to my collar, and better lighting and the classroom could have served as the set for my talkshow.

So all in all, I can't really complain - class is pretty good and interesting. Except for the horrible definition of globalization as an increase in transplanetary social connections, which we have to work with for the rest of the module. I'm so over globalization. It's like the Rachel haircut and eurodance raves ... it's so 1990s!

One thing I really like about the group is that we get along and try and get together as much as possible outside the classroom. Like on Monday night, some of us went to see the second performance from the GobSquad, "Room Service - Help Me Make It Through The Night." Unlike the previous hour-long production we saw, this one was going to be about 5 hours and would involve audience participation.

The people who starred in it were great. Having to perform for 5 hours straight is definitely hard work, and since they do a number of performances that involve well-cue music and excellent timing, I have to say that I'm really impressed. But as much as I like them, I'm sure that my sole acting experience that will garner me an Oscar for Best Actor will be better - I'm just saying ...!

In fact, I even got to try out my acting chops since this production relied on audience interaction. One of the performers, Sarah, called down to where the audience was and asked someone if they'd pick up the phone and play truth or dare with her. Since nobody volunteered, I got up and answered the phone to a loud round of applause. I felt like standing there and telling everyone that I'd like to thank my parents, my friends, my director and most importantly the academy for voting for me.

Anyways, Sarah and I got to know each other. We decided to play truth or dare. She chose a dare and collectively, we asked her to phone reception and ask if they knew how to hire "male entertainment." Sadly, the receptionist didn't ... oh well!

And of course, I'm no fool - I chose truth and she asked me if I ever cheated. Umm, I just can't do that - I have morals, and ethics ... and values! I have standards ... and just like those at Scarborough West S.S. would know, they may be low, but they are standards nonetheless.

All in all, it was a great time. She and I are BFFs now ... look out Paris and Nicole, there's a new BFF team in town!

But the fun didn't stop there - I elected to have Martin, Albana's boyfriend (she's in my class) follow after me and he chose to do the same thing with another one of the characters. Only this one character took things really far ... he wanted to be exactly like Martin and for the next five hours, all he did was pretend to work his way to becoming the Pope's newest software consultant.

And it got even better - the final act involved someone from the audience going up to one of the character's rooms because she didn't want to be alone as she had just broken up with her boyfriend. Jan, another one of the students in the programme, decided to go, after me and a few other people encouraged him to. It was such a mistake. He ended up being tied to a chair and couldn't talk. I felt so sorry for him!

But all in all, it was great fun. And even though it was a long 5 hours, at the end of it, it was worth it. Plus, there was some really deep parts of the production too, like a song on sleep and how it represents people who spend their whole life sleeping through their dreams, rather than trying to make them a reality.

So that was Monday, and our next group outing was on Friday. As it was coming to the close of the Aarhus Festival, so we decided to go to this party that was happening in downtown. Essentially, it was more or less a giant club built primarily for the purposes of the festival. But honestly, having now been to two clubs in Aarhus, I can say that in Toronto, we do it a lot different.

Like with fashion ... what some of the people were wearing was just plain tragic. Guys in running shoes and shorts, girls in horrible tops and tights with wretched (that's my new British word of the week), Amy Winehouse-inspired hair. And everyone's donning the keffiyeh like it's uber trendy - I honestly doubt if those who wear it even know the meaning behind it.

And the music, I don't even know what to say. I didn't hear one top-40 hit. Where was Rhianna or Katy Perry or Leona Lewis or Linkin Park or remixed with a dance beat? The music was just off and the DJ even had the audacity to plan a hard-rock song. Everybody was dancing with a little head-bopping to the side. I felt like I was moshing, just minus the drunk idiot thinking that crowd surfing is hot - it was definitely raw, edgy, and hardcore ... only, this wasn't a concert, it was a club!

Thank goodness we left at 2am, just before the live band took the stage. Considering that they did a pathetic round of sound checks for what seemed like half an hour, I was glad to leave - I don't think that staying to listen to crappy emo music meets techno meets hardcore rock was really my thing!

On the plus side, now that it's Saturday, I have only 15 more weeks in Aarhus before I'm home again. Seriously, I'm in such desperate need of a medium double-double from Tim Horton's!

Then again, I did have the chance to make a new BFF and test out my acting chops, so I guess Aarhus isn't that bad after all - well, except for the club fashions and music!

I think the bees in Denmark are alcoholics ...

2008-08-31T17:24:00.001-04:00

Okay, so it's been a few busy days here in Denmark, but let me first start by making a proud declaration ... I've survived my first week in Aarhus. Not that it was hard, but when I first got here, I was totally not impressed, but now the "city" has grown on me and I feel more at home ... although, I'll always be a Torontonian at heart.

Anyways, one of the things I've noticed here are the bees - there are tons of them. They are everywhere ... you're never alone in Aarhus because there's always a bee close by. Seriously, though, the bees seem to hang out with the beer drinkers - like on Friday, they were buzzing around the people drinking beer in the Friday Bar. And just as we were about to leave, I saw this one bee literally swimming in a cup of beer. Honestly, it stayed there for like 3 minutes! I would've loved to have seen it attempt to fly away drunk!

The bee really seemed to be enjoying itself, and that's why I'm convinced that all the bees in Denmark are alcoholics. I feel like telling them "The first step is admitting you have a problem". Well that, and I'm reminded of the Trix commercial "Silly bees, beer is for grown-ups"!

Okay, on to more important things. This week coming up is Aarhus Festival. It's like Taste of the Danforth meets Illuminato meets the Beer Festival - there is something for everyone. And it seems like everyone in Aarhus participates in the festival.

So a bunch of my classmates decide to walk downtown and visit some of the attractions. We end up going to this Alice in Wonderland meets treehouse projects concert venue in the western part of downtown. It was very sketchy, very hippy, very not me! It just had this weird vibe that I honestly wasn't feeling. Well that, and everyone was drinking beer and looked ready to pass out!

Instead, we walked through the town and ended up at the port of Aarhus. It sounds nicer than it actually is - it's a very industrialized shipping port. But whatever, it provided a nice backdrop for a few photos - it was edgy, it was raw, it was urban ... it was fabulous!

As we were walking back, we ended up seeing a bunch of people from class who were heading to this theatre performance. So I was left with a choice - should I go and see a performance or go home and read something really boring that had nothing to do with celebrities at all. I think we all know which option I chose ...

Before the performance, we ended up hanging out at this outdoor cafe where I got an ice cream, although with a disgusting view of a pig roasting on an open fire - honestly, it only made me that more convinced that I'll never eat pork or beef again! The ice cream wasn't bad, but it was expensive, like so many things in Aarhus!

When we finally thought we found the place, only half of the group ended up going in. The other half, myself included, waited outside thinking that they were buying our tickets. After 20 minutes, I think we all realized they weren't coming back and tried to find the place ourselves - we ended up barely making it in time to see the performance.

Anyways, the performance we saw was a movie shot by the Gob Squad. They were great. The central premise of the movie was that one of the characters had to save Aarhus from anonymity by kissing a random stranger. The other three characters played a role in making the perfect shot - one of them had to find the person to take part in the kiss, another had to conduct the PR work, and the last person had to find the ideal location. What was great about the movie was that each character shot their own movie and it was recorded about 20 minutes before it was screened - it was truly "live" video.

Besides that, we also ventured to the Social Club, which apparently is Denmark's only club. I was shocked at the dress code - I was let in wearing flip-flops, jeans and a t-shirt. It was so different than the dress code of Richmond Street. And for all of my friends who enjoy beer, you should definitely make it to Aarhus and visit the Social Club. Not only was admission free if you have a student card, so was beer - all you have to do is reuse the same glass your first beer came in. Of course, it was all wasted on me, because, you know, beer is gross - and has too many calories!

So Saturday was officially my latest night - I got home at about 12:30am and got to see tons of drunk people stumbling around town. Not that I would judge them, but I seriously cannot understand how you can have fun when you can't even remember what happened that night - then again, people need friends like me to remind them of the hijinks from the night before!

Sunday, was a pretty awesome day because I met up with two of the students in my programme and we went to the beach. Although it was small, I still had the chance to get in some quality tanning time. There was tons of seaweed on the beach and there were people everywhere (since it was like the warmest Aarhus has been since I've arrived) so I couldn't really have it to myself.

And so that's pretty much what has happened the last few days. Now, I've got to get back into the university grind - we already have an assignment due tomorrow along with a bunch of readings.

Not that I'll actually do them ... I'll just rely on my charm, my wit, and my sense of humour to get me through the class.

And if that doesn't work, at least I have my fabulous sense of style!

I'm going to be famous ... well in Denmark at least !

2008-08-27T18:19:00.002-04:00

I've officially been a student for the past few days, and between April and August of this year nothing has really changed - I still take at least 45 minutes to get ready in the morning.

After all, I have to keep the York tradition alive - I must ensure that I look like I just stepped off the runway at all times!

Anyways, the week started out with activities and those forced introduction and communication icebreakers. For the most part, I've never been a fan of these types of things. I find the whole "Hi, I'm Andrew ..." ends up forcing communication between people, instead of allowing it to naturally flow.

Besides, I'd like to think that I'm pretty social - in fact, I'm sure I've spoken to everyone in the programme at least once.

Once those activities were out of the way, we were introduced to the practicalities of the programme - readings, assignments, grades, etc. It's looking like I'll actually have to do the assigned readings - I won't be able to rely on my charm, wit, and ability to demonstrate how entertainment news relates to anything and everything. Oh well, little does my professor know that my thesis will be on how People magazine has exported the ideals of Brangelina and how this represents a new form of globalization.

Anyways, the first two days have been relatively boring and uneventful, but full of opportunities to talk and gossip - things I do best. I'd have to say the best part was finding out how much money is in my Danish bank account - and no, I won't reveal how much because I'm not looking to make donations to the latest cause celebre.

I almost forgot ... we did have Danish lessons on Tuesday. And as much as I'd love to learn the language, it's not phonetic - it doesn't sound similar to how it is spelled. So I don't think I'm missing out on much. Everyone seems to speak English and I've noticed that walking down the street, you hear an eclectic mix of Danish, English, Chinese, Arabic and a host of other languages - and you know, given how multi-ethnic my "background" is, I'm sure I won't have trouble fitting in or continuing my tradition of celebrating any "gift-receiving" holidays.

And in some weird way, trying to learn Danish has made me more motivated to become fluent in French. Don't ask me why, but I guess Danish seems so hard and French seems so easy - plus, when I have my national talk show on the CBC, I'd like to be able to offer my final thought of the day in both English and French.

Speaking of my talk show, the coolest thing happened to me today - and yes, it did involve a microphone!

So last week, I got a random e-mail from a production facility based in Denmark. In the message, I was asked if I would like to record a brief script in English for a safety video for a large Danish security company.

I'm not going to lie - at first, I was really hesitant because I didn't know who these people were. But I searched the name, and they turned out to be a legitimate company that has produced a number of video campaigns.

Anyways, the day that they had wanted to record was the day I was supposed to learn Danish - but seriously, how much can you learn in 3 hours? So we rescheduled it for the following day, and they were so eager for me to participate that they even travelled to Aarhus University to make the recording.

When it came down to it, making the recording was fun. All I had to do was read 4 lines of text and I think I did a really good job. And I think they were impressed because I made a few ad-lib changes to make it sound more authentic.

We ended up doing four takes in roughly 15 minutes and I earned 1000 Danish Crowns, which is about $200 Canadian. Not too bad for 15 minutes of work.

Now all I'm saying is that this had better not be my 15 minutes of fame - otherwise they can take the money back, because I don't think the recording will earn me an an Oscar, Golden Globe and Emmy - unless I buy votes!

Oh, and for those of you thinking you can get a copy of this recording and sell it to the National Enquirer, it will be tough - you know I had my lawyers put in a "no reselling to third parties who wish to disparage the on-air talent's name and good nature."

I just can't have bad press - well, at least until I've been to Promises in Malibu at least once!

Forget the Plastics, the newest clique in town is NAFTA!

2008-08-24T15:52:00.004-04:00

So last night, a number of the students in my programme decided to get together with our student mentors and go out for a few drinks.

We decided on this small bar in downtown Aarhus and because our group was so big, we had to use the downstairs "party room". Honestly, walking down the stairs and through narrow corridors reminded me of every cliche-laden horror film. I has half-expecting someone to burst out with a knife or a saw of some sort to wreak havoc - thank goodness I kept my eye on the emergency exits at all times and calculated the number of flips I'd need to do in order to escape and still score a perfect 10!

Anyways, I made it downstairs okay (not without almost hitting my head though) and was surprised to learn that you can smoke inside clubs and bars in Aarhus, unlike Toronto. As soon as the first person lit up their cigarette, I had a headache - where's the Vicodin when you need it!

I found that meeting my classmates confirmed to me that I'm definitely the youngest person in the programme, which I'm not sure if I should be excited or nervous about. The other people that I'll be studying with seem really nice. I'm just worried that being the youngest also means I'm the most inexperienced when it comes to "traditional" journalism.

And realizing that has made me seriously question whether this is the right programme for me. I just don't know if it will give me what I want and whether I can actively participate with such a limited amount of experience to draw on. I guess I'll see how the programme goes and see if it feels like the right fit for me. If not, then I'll most likely relocate to LA sometime next year and try and launch my career as Oprah's replacement.

Oh well, enough with the worry (because I do it so well) ... back on topic. It turns out that many of the people living in residences around me are aware that my house is known as the party house, meaning that my house is in need of a serious image overhaul.

And for most of the night, I chatted with this girl from Mexico, and together with Kim, we've been calling ourselves NAFTA - it's like our own little clique, made all the better by our appreciation for a cinematic masterpiece, Mean Girls.

I ended up leaving at around 11pm because I was tired, jet lagged and was getting a pretty bad headache. Walking home from downtown Aarhus to my house was pretty simple and quick too (by the way, for those of you who want to see where I live in relation to the school, click here). Personally, it felt like walking through a much less hectic downtown Toronto - just with more bikes and people carrying cans of beer.

And while walking at night, I discovered that Aarhus seems to have more pubs, bars, and cafes, compared to clubs, which is fine by me, since we all know I despise clubs, not just for the skankified fashions, but also because everyone is so close together and sweaty and drunk - plain and simple, it's just gross and unsafe!

But I did see my first drunk person who passed out in the middle of a street. Thank goodness someone came to help them because I honestly didn't know what to do - other than stylishly walk by slowly until someone tries to wake him. Gosh, they love their alcohol here.

So tomorrow I officially start classes with Orientation. It'll be interesting to meet everyone else and see how the programme is structured. I have so many questions - like when is the first free weekend I have to go on a shopping spree in London?

Arriving, getting settled, and learning that not everyone thinks I'm the kid from Degrassi

2008-08-23T18:03:00.001-04:00

I've officially arrived in Europe - well I arrived a few days ago.

So far, it's been an interesting journey. There have been ups and downs, but for the most part, I'm really excited. Getting here, given all my issues with finding the proper flights, was pretty easy.

And for those of you who don't believe me, it's true - I managed to pack in a ton of my clothes, a portable steamer, 10 pairs of shoes, toiletries, and my favourite DVDs into two bags that easily came within the 50lbs limit.

The first part of my trip took me from Toronto to Frankfurt, Germany. Most surprisingly was the totally awesome flight attendants who were really nice. And, true to form, I sat at the back of the plane and was one of the last people to board – you know, because I've got a chance to walk down the aisle, pretending it's a runway and acting all fierce. And to make it complete, all I needed was a few camera flashes and people yelling my name and I would've been set!

In Frankfurt, I definitely got lost, simply because the airport is so busy and nobody really knows where they are going. I finally find out the gate for my next flight, and am shocked to learn that a bus will be taking us to our plane – umm, excuse me, what happened to those jet gateway things?

Anyways, as I stand on the tarmac breathing in dirty airplane air, waiting to board the plane, a flight attendant comes over and lets me know that I can board via the back exit of the plane – score!

This flight, from Frankfurt to Copenhagen, was alright. But what was even better was the mall that's inside Copenhagen Airport. It had a Starbucks and a slew of really good stores, so you know, I charged myself a little happy.

And as I'm sitting in the airport, I noticed one of the people in my class, Kim. After talking about everything from our flights to our journalism experience, we debate who had a better Black Friday 2007 campaign, which, I won of course, because you know, I am Canada's #1-ranked Professional Cross Border Shopping Champion.

My last flight, from Copenhagen to Aarhus was on this small propeller cargo plane. Surprisingly, the plane was full and crowded and the engines made a lot of noise. Thank goodness the flight was only 30 minutes, and as we approach the airport, I honestly thought the pane was making an emergency landing on a farm. Instead, it turns out that the airport is just so small - literally, it's one building with two shops and I didn't even see a security checkpoint.

I grab my bags, and along with Kim, we hop onto the bus that will take us to Aarhus. When we arrive in Aarhus, I get a call from Anna, my student mentor who's meeting me at the train station. She's really nice and explains how the buses work and which ones I take to get to my house.

As we arrive at my house, I'm a little nervous because it's on a main road. But, it is literally steps from Aarhus University, so I can't really complain.

Inside, the house is nice, and I've got a bedroom upstairs. On my floor are three other students and we share a bathroom and kitchen.

For the rent I'm paying – about $660 Canadian, I'm not that impressed. My room came with only a bed, a chair, a desk, and a bookshelf. The washroom and kitchen are small and I have to pay for laundry. But whatever, I'll make do – and on the plus side, there's a small shopping mall right beside my house!

Despite my problems with my room, the people who I'm staying with seem nice – even though they are a little loud and I can tell some of them like to party. Obviously, we'll have to nip that in bud ASAP! At least they'll let me do my thing and clean!

Anyways, turns out that in my house is another girl from Canada - but she's not in the same programme as me. We start talking as she has a cigarette outside.

Midway through our conversation, she says that I look like someone familiar. Expecting her to say that I look like the kid from Degrassi, I was pleasantly surprised when she said I reminded her of a friend she had back home. Thank goodness - and I loved the fact that she doesn't see the resemblance between me and a D-list Canadian celebrity. Besides, I've always thought of myself as at least B-list, if not A-list material!

So after getting settled, I visit the grocery store and yes, I did buy food, despite the fact that I couldn't read most of the labels. I just stuck with things I knew, like water, bananas, bread, multi grain Cheerios, coffee, juice and milk.

The following day, on Friday, Anna, myself and Kim go to the National Registry to get our CPR numbers. I thought it would take longer, but we were done within 20 minutes. With all this free time, Kim and I venture off to Ikea.

I think I've only ever been to the Ikea in Toronto 3 times at the most, so I'm not sure what to expect. Inside, this Ikea was huge. It's definitely bigger than the stores in Toronto.

Since we have time to spare, we decide to walk throughout the entire store. However, because we are only here for 4 months, I have to temper what I buy and focus on the basics. The best part about our trip were the prices – for the equivalent of about $50 Canadian, I got two large towels, two small towels, a portable clothing rack, two cups, two bowls, a plate, hangers, and a small duvet & slip cover.

So with two huge bags in tow, I return back to my house. And now, with a bit of furniture, my room is starting to look more livable and more homey – although I'm limited to one hanging clothes rack, meaning that I'm literally living out of suitcases. Oh well, it's all about sacrifice, and since I really want to have a good time in London, I'll skimp on things here and in Amsterdam so that my place in London looks really good for those of you who'll come and visit.

All in all, it's been an interesting few days – from a computer crash to decent flights to an awesome Ikea adventure.

Hopefully, it will only get better, since our Orientation session starts on Monday, and I've got a feeling that I'm the youngest person in the programme!

And with any luck, I'll be the best dressed too!